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me again. just want to vent a bit about my situation. turns out this year, my father took out a loan for around 50 000,00 thousand dollars wasted all off it on himself without us knowing about it. my father was forced to take a loan many years ago (i wont talk about why) and my mother helped pay it off. they both worked and it took 13 years to pay that loan off and as soon as he was green., he decided to take the new loan this year and has been spending it all on what i said last time. i doubt he will ever be able to pay it back, being in his 50ths, living off the system etc.

it all feels like a bad dream to be honest. you could make a movie out of how batshit insane he is (hell, he could be a lolcow with a thread on this site lol)

but its clear now, the hard times will start now and im in for a bad time.
 
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If he comes to his senses, I wouldn't worry about it at all. Just pay the minimum, and when he dies. Just don't take over the debt, because the bank will try to lure you into it.
i dont know how it works in Sweden but in other countries, they force the next of kin to pay off any debts if the person dies or disappears.

i honestly think my father wants to die but to afraid to do it the old fashion way.
 
If insurance allows, I'll be in rehab starting tomorrow. Wish me luck in detox. Cuz tremors on the couch is not my idea of fun.
Usually if you're on something you spaz out from withdrawing from, like booze or benzos, they at least give you a painfully weak and shitty benzo like Ativan. And a B vitamin shot if you seem to be deficient in those.
 
I haven't been doing too good lately. I've been extremely lonely, and painfully bored. The only good thing that's happened recently is that I passed my GED tests. Sadly, that doesn't really make up for the crushing loneliness. I've mostly given up on finding a relationship due to nobody I meet online living anywhere near me. All I can really do is occasionally post on r9k looking for potential boyfriends because I'm too much of a social retard and a coward to meet people IRL. And to top it off, I've had a really bad cough for the past week.
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I’m really sorry to hear that man, loneliness can be a agonising dull and drawn out feeling, I’ve been feeling the same way, I’ve recently officially dropped out of university ( it was my third *sigh*) and as a result I’ve had to find work doing leafleting going from house to house in a place near my area and deliver leaflets to aspecific amount of houses through their letterboxes m. It’s as boring s it sounds even though the pay is decent, but man does it wear you down. I’m also left thinking about from the past like at school how I regret a lot of time I was squandering there, not making or cultivating the relationships I should have done and letting others walk all over me when I shouldn’t.

I resent my lack of freedom as I’m 25 and still at home, and there aren’t currently many prospects of me living away anytime soon, I’m constantly strapped for money and live on the edge, I constantly have to be careful about every damn thing I spend and I’ve ended up broke many times, it’s beyond frustrating. So yeah not brilliant .😔
 
Been better, after nearly a year on immunosuppressant treatment I finally caught my first opportunistic infection, and it is in my balls. Pain was so bad I had to go to the ER a couple of days ago thinking I had testicular torsion. Getting better, but having my balls ultrasounded was an experience to be sure.
 
Using up my vacation time for the remainder of the year. I have at least one day off every week this month.

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Some dumb bitch killed my car. An old "wolf in sheep's skin" thingy that I've spent a lot of blood, sweat, alcohol, and knuckle skin fixing up. She somehow managed it in a 20kph/15mph parking lot, stone cold sober, also taking out a newish parked BMW and the window of a sporting goods store.

Right now, I wanna rape, torture and murder all the world's Karens(tm). This from a guy who has a teenaged induced Skinnerian paraohilia for women named Karen/Karin (see also: Hermann Goering).
 
I have my precalculus final coming up. Struggled with this class for a number of reasons, but my third go at it has actually been going significantly better than the first two (I think it being in-person helped a lot). Even though things have been going better, I can't stop worrying that I'm gonna fuck this up, but I should probably have a little more faith in myself

ETA: Didn't do particularly well on the final, but it was only worth 20% of my overall grade. I got out with a C. It's good enough
 
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Just found out yesterday that my dad is in the hospital, some dirty nasty fucking cunt gave him a cold and now he's on a downward spiral and might die because he's got no immune system due to treatments for leukemia. He has a very strong chance of dying so I'm trying to plan a trip as soon as I can to see him. No one fucking told me where he was, not a fucking one. I'm disgusted.
 
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