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I am curious if anyone is from a big city and has since relocated to a rural location very happily.
Many things have happened in the last 10 years which have rendered my contemplation. I'm from the Bronx and I have left home many times- to join the military, to live in Australia for 5 years, Argentina for 2 years, contract work around the US many years.... and every time I leave, I miss the city enough that it actively bothers me everyday till I get back. It's not family ties; my parents have died now along with my grandparents and my uncles, aunts, cousins & siblings live abroad.
I'm simply in love with my city. But it's killing me. Is there any possibility I can leave for good and not exist heartbroken?
 
I am curious if anyone is from a big city and has since relocated to a rural location very happily.
Many things have happened in the last 10 years which have rendered my contemplation. I'm from the Bronx and I have left home many times- to join the military, to live in Australia for 5 years, Argentina for 2 years, contract work around the US many years.... and every time I leave, I miss the city enough that it actively bothers me everyday till I get back. It's not family ties; my parents have died now along with my grandparents and my uncles, aunts, cousins & siblings live abroad.
I'm simply in love with my city. But it's killing me. Is there any possibility I can leave for good and not exist heartbroken?
No. You're tainted now and will forever remain human cattle in your dystopian home.
 
I am curious if anyone is from a big city and has since relocated to a rural location very happily.
Many things have happened in the last 10 years which have rendered my contemplation. I'm from the Bronx and I have left home many times- to join the military, to live in Australia for 5 years, Argentina for 2 years, contract work around the US many years.... and every time I leave, I miss the city enough that it actively bothers me everyday till I get back. It's not family ties; my parents have died now along with my grandparents and my uncles, aunts, cousins & siblings live abroad.
I'm simply in love with my city. But it's killing me. Is there any possibility I can leave for good and not exist heartbroken?
I live far out in the country and used to work in a big city, but I also despise big cities with every fiber of my being so I can't really speak to missing city/subdivision life without that bias. I lived in the outskirts of a big city prior to my current place. It was 45 minutes away from where I worked at the time and I was content with it until they started the usual route of ruining a small town by slapping in strip malls. I got a new job that lets me 100% remote save for 1 day out of the month, which is around the time the cocksuckers started building a Wal-Mart directly across from my subdivision. On a 2 lane road. Said fuck that shit, found a multi-acre property where I only have one neighbor who is 2 acres away, the property across the road from me is marked as historic, and the town hall works hard to keep the city out, even running off Dollar General when they were looking to buy nearby land. 2 hour drive when I have to go into the office and half an hour to get groceries, but I don't mind, I don't miss it for a second and I love the peace and quiet without other houses almost touching tips on the roofs.
 
I live far out in the country and used to work in a big city, but I also despise big cities with every fiber of my being so I can't really speak to missing city/subdivision life without that bias. I lived in the outskirts of a big city prior to my current place. It was 45 minutes away from where I worked at the time and I was content with it until they started the usual route of ruining a small town by slapping in strip malls. I got a new job that lets me 100% remote save for 1 day out of the month, which is around the time the cocksuckers started building a Wal-Mart directly across from my subdivision. On a 2 lane road. Said fuck that shit, found a multi-acre property where I only have one neighbor who is 2 acres away, the property across the road from me is marked as historic, and the town hall works hard to keep the city out, even running off Dollar General when they were looking to buy nearby land. 2 hour drive when I have to go into the office and half an hour to get groceries, but I don't mind, I don't miss it for a second and I love the peace and quiet without other houses almost touching tips on the roofs.
My city banned Walmart and Amazon. I actually relish in the big parking lots and internal shopping cart lane space of those places when I leave the city. Walmart seems a purely suburban and rural area landmark to me.
I understand and appreciate the advantages of elsewhere, I'm simply asking if ever elsewhere feels genuinely better than home. If so, how
 
something snapped, and i'm finally ready to quit my job without anything else lined up. it'll probably be fatal to the white-collar career i spent 8 years to get qualified for, but they're working me to death, literally. i feel ill all the time. i don't even have the capacity to apply to other jobs. i rarely ever get a full weekend off, and when i do, it's because i'm neglecting tasks that will come back to bite me the next week.

i think i would rather move back into my parents' house than continue to live like this for the foreseeable future.
 
I am curious if anyone is from a big city and has since relocated to a rural location very happily.
I actually did leave a city during pandemic and I’m quiet happy for it to be honest. I do miss it in ways and there was a lot of things I couldn’t of participate because of money and other factors that I wish I did but at the end of the day I know there’s no going back.

It depends on how much of a shithole you city has become in my opinion, I had to leave myself because things were somehow more dangerous when it got gentrified VS when it was starting out and we’re increasingly getting more expensive. So I guess it depends on how fed up with the area you are. I finally can enjoy the outdoors more and I have a balcony, I’d still like to distance myself with the roommate I have at one point but I know with how things are and are projected that’s not happening anytime soon.
I live far out in the country
I don’t know where you live but it sounds great. Most of the towns that I’ve visited or lived in have been infected by greed and corporate scum. I’d love to have more local things in my town but everywhere I go the cattle fixate on Starbucks and other shit brands. It’s even happening in my town currently and I don’t see things going good in 10 years.
 
I actually did leave a city during pandemic and I’m quiet happy for it to be honest. I do miss it in ways and there was a lot of things I couldn’t of participate because of money and other factors that I wish I did but at the end of the day I know there’s no going back.

It depends on how much of a shithole you city has become in my opinion, I had to leave myself because things were somehow more dangerous when it got gentrified VS when it was starting out and we’re increasingly getting more expensive. So I guess it depends on how fed up with the area you are. I finally can enjoy the outdoors more and I have a balcony, I’d still like to distance myself with the roommate I have at one point but I know with how things are and are projected that’s not happening anytime soon.

I don’t know where you live but it sounds great. Most of the towns that I’ve visited or lived in have been infected by greed and corporate scum. I’d love to have more local things in my town but everywhere I go the cattle fixate on Starbucks and other shit brands. It’s even happening in my town currently and I don’t see things going good in 10 years.
Please elaborate, born and raised in a big city? How big, >500k or <1 million? Did you own a car when you resided in city?
 
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My city banned Walmart and Amazon. I actually relish in the big parking lots and internal shopping cart lane space of those places when I leave the city. Walmart seems a purely suburban and rural area landmark to me.
I understand and appreciate the advantages of elsewhere, I'm simply asking if ever elsewhere feels genuinely better than home. If so, how
Yeah, my bad, I definitely came off ranty there. Like I said I definitely have a bias and I can't pretend it doesn't still irritate me to think about how often decent little towns are being turned into stip mall hell. For me home is wherever my family is. I always feel better when I'm surrounded by my immediate family or my old friend group which is why I'm always way happier during the holidays than the rest of the year. Not really a specific location, I'm just the most content when I get to spend time with the people I care about. I'm still within driving distance of my family which works for me. I think if you find the right place that still meets your requirements and interests you might not miss it as much, but there will always be pros and cons to any place. Grocery day is an even bigger chore and if you need something fast, Amazon most likely isn't going to be a next day delivery so you have to go get it, but for me the pros definitely outweigh everything else.

I don’t know where you live but it sounds great. Most of the towns that I’ve visited or lived in have been infected by greed and corporate scum. I’d love to have more local things in my town but everywhere I go the cattle fixate on Starbucks and other shit brands. It’s even happening in my town currently and I don’t see things going good in 10 years.
That's pretty much how it was at my last place. Was great when I moved there. First house, there was no other houses behind our subdivision so you could watch deer walking around, mostly retired couples living there so it was pretty quiet. Took about 7 years for them to fill every spot of land they could find with bullshit and put three more subdivisions behind us which made the original residents leave/rent out their houses and the trash started moving in. Wal-Marts always make the area directly around it look ghetto so I knew I had to gtfo before it was finished.
 
I grew up in the country (5 miles from town, 10 miles from bigger town, 45 miles from actual shopping). And since then have lived in places with populations all over the map.

Before where I am now I was in a giant Californian city. The amenities were nice, we had Fry's Electronics, Costco, REI, Ikea, etc. And I thought that was all great and I'd always want to live somewhere near all that. After a couple years I started trying to buy a house (2010ish) and was getting outbid with people offering cash and waived inspections. About the same time I changed jobs to a remote work place and I snapped. Moved to the hinterlands of the Pacific Northwest, closer to a small town than where I grew up with a few more amenities, but all the real amenities are much further away. Sure I have to go to Home Depot every couple weeks, and the trek to Ikea is once or twice a year, Fry's Electronics is dead, the airport is a pain to get to but they don't make me come to the office much. And I paid 1/3 of the price for a house, with some land, still a subdivision and the fucking neighbor across the street keeps his outside lights on all the time, but it's still nicer than the city at the end of the day. Population of this town and county has been basically flat for many years, there's no real industry here so there's no new jobs, so there's no population pressure to move here so there's no new strip malls, which is nice.

About the only things I do miss is good healthcare and getting people to do literally anything. I visited a city and had an ear problem, the local mall had a clinic, walked in, was seen within 30 minutes, no appointment, not an urgent care either just for normal every day stuff. Here it's 3 months until you can see a doctor for the first time if you're lucky. For other stuff it's a giant pain to get electricians, plumbers or other contractors, they either never call back or say sure, how's summer 2025 sound?

You win some, you lose some.
 
@WASR96
Not at all I understand I hear it often. As you said, largely what is valued is the proximity to family and familiarity. These are not characteristics I necessarily seek in any given place as my family is not here or wherever I may go & I've lived around enough that every land, sky and weather are adaptable. It's not discernible enough a sensation to put to words. Something about home and heart I'm sure. Just hope to know eventually how to eliminate it from actively bothering my day to day life when I leave this vindictive bitch of a place that I innately love.
 
Please elaborate, born and raised in a big city? How big, >500k or <1 million? Did you own a car when you resided in city?
It was about 200,000 residents and I did not have a car at the time, I usually bummed rides from friends and family and trust me the road infrastructure was not fun.

My current area is about 20,000 in population because it’s a small city (think a small 1900s city that never really developed past the 50s) I still don’t have a car currently but the busing infistructure is 1,000 times better. I’d imagine if you could ride the train where your at it would be better (I haven’t taken a subway though). The thing that makes me really happy about my place is I’m paying for the same price when I first moved to the city (a grand) but I get a lot of amenities and maintenance guys who aren’t bitchy all the time. I could not imagine what my old apartment costs now (I think it was 3-4 grand when I left and it was just a 2 bedroom box)

Like I said though if you aren’t facing the problems I once had then things should be fine but if you miss family, hate being accosted by homeless 24/7, dislike a lot of the people you are around in the city, hate the infrastructure or dislike where the city’s going then you won’t regret a thing.
 
not doing good.
this will end in disaster, but not a soul will know in the real world.

how do i stop destroying my own happiness?

why cant it let me be. why cant i just enjoy something as it happens?

im at the point of having all possibilities open for me, free of the past if i choose to.

yet i cant manage myself, or keep me on track. i will loose the person that means the most to me.

why am i standing still?
i know what to do, yet i do onlybullshit or nothing.

im tired of this curse not letting me go. im doomed.
 
It was about 200,000 residents and I did not have a car at the time, I usually bummed rides from friends and family and trust me the road infrastructure was not fun.

My current area is about 20,000 in population because it’s a small city (think a small 1900s city that never really developed past the 50s) I still don’t have a car currently but the busing infistructure is 1,000 times better. I’d imagine if you could ride the train where your at it would be better (I haven’t taken a subway though). The thing that makes me really happy about my place is I’m paying for the same price when I first moved to the city (a grand) but I get a lot of amenities and maintenance guys who aren’t bitchy all the time. I could not imagine what my old apartment costs now (I think it was 3-4 grand when I left and it was just a 2 bedroom box)

Like I said though if you aren’t facing the problems I once had then things should be fine but if you miss family, hate being accosted by homeless 24/7, dislike a lot of the people you are around in the city, hate the infrastructure or dislike where the city’s going then you won’t regret a thing.
Many things you describe are feeding my discontent. Here we have about 11 Million inhabitants + commuters daily. It takes 1.5 hours to travel 10 miles in rush hour. To run or bike, you inhale traffic several hours daily. To take public transit and work full time + personal life, $300 monthly average. To park is impossible, untimely & costly. To own a car is to pay a mortgage considering insurance for the zip code. Yes there are a million doctors and lawyers and contractors and whatever you may need, but you are one of 11 million customers to them. None will remember your name or what you last spoke about, and yet you'll pay a fortune to see them.
Don't get me started on rent. Or crime. Or squatters. Or public works. Or public school. Or the roads. The tolls. The ever rapid increase of cost and then even quicker decline in quality of life.

And yet,
It is very dark outside of here. Very alien at times. Very standoffish when you come from somewhere else. Meanwhile if you were to relocate here, no one would notice you'll blend in and start new without that issue.
 
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And yet,
It is very dark outside of here. Very alien at times. Very standoffish when you come from somewhere else. Meanwhile if you were to relocate here, no one would notice you'll blend in and start new without that issue
Theres nothing wrong with you. You're just a homebody like many other people in this site who just so happened to be on the other side of the current shitflinging. That guy who hates the idea of having a strip mall within an hour of him is sharing a similar response to what you have to the idea of leaving behind your home to where it feels wrong to leave it behind or have it taken from you. Yes, there are tons of hipsters all over the place who are going to mock you for being where you are but they're honestly no better than all the snobs who would mock and shun people who didn't leave the countryside for the big city decades ago. Just be happy where you feel like you belong.
 
I wish I could move back to my home town. It was a forest town where you had to hike through the trees for shortcuts to different parts of the town and it was beautiful.
Even if you could things aren't the same any more. Even the more rural areas are being expanded into and destroyed because someone needs more housing for niggers.
 
I wish I could move back to my home town. It was a forest town where you had to hike through the trees for shortcuts to different parts of the town and it was beautiful.
The good old times..

Been thinking about life and future,guess thats how being handled with the responsibility feels like.
 
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I am curious if anyone is from a big city and has since relocated to a rural location very happily.
Many things have happened in the last 10 years which have rendered my contemplation. I'm from the Bronx and I have left home many times- to join the military, to live in Australia for 5 years, Argentina for 2 years, contract work around the US many years.... and every time I leave, I miss the city enough that it actively bothers me everyday till I get back. It's not family ties; my parents have died now along with my grandparents and my uncles, aunts, cousins & siblings live abroad.
I'm simply in love with my city. But it's killing me. Is there any possibility I can leave for good and not exist heartbroken?
You may not be able to. Alot of time's there is simply nothing someone can do about where their stride is in life and thats that. My mom doesn't live in the area I am in anymore and despite being born and raised in it for over 25 years she still has the housewife demeanor from the area no matter how far she lives away from it.
 
Tired, burnt out and worn out. I've been looking for a new job but it feels exhausting just trying to keep up with stuff as usual. Combine that with personal troubles, family drama, and multiple people recently quitting at my current work (who still have yet to be replaced) and I've come home most days of the week just to lie down and fall asleep on the sofa.
 
I got to go out out more job applications, as I have no idea what the hell happened with the school bus driver job I thought I had. I had three days of training to write the written test for the bus drivers license, and I let them know so that they could in a week or two schedule me to start the driving part of the test, but it's been two weeks and they haven't scheduled me yet and I have no information on what's going on.

Update: I checked on my Armed Forces application and noticed a change, so I called in and it does sound like I'm in a queue for the final interview, but it's triaged so it might be quite a wait still. So sounds like that's still moving which is promising but really for being desperate for recruits they sure move slow.
 
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