How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[Avocado Kin]

Good news: You're not.

Well, that’s just my personal belief and it scares me

 

[Nick Obre]

Well, that’s just my personal belief and it scares me

So stop it.

I'll put aside my insufferable atheism for a moment and say that usually I think there's people who get some sort of comfort or solace in religion and belief, and that's ok. If it improves your life and hurts no one, that's good.

But you're here telling us that it's a source of anxiety and suffering. So why put that upon yourself? Think about why you believe it, challenge the assumptions that cause it, and try to release yourself from that self-imposed fear.

 

[Clovis]

I'm ok. Took the dog to get his dew- claws trimmed because he hates it and I'd rather pay the nice local dog groomer girl to be the villain than fight him at home any more.

Went next door and got another piercing while I was waiting for him to show solidarity with his trauma. We were both Very Brave so we went to the pub as a reward.

Every day I appreciate living in a solid middle class, stable, affluent area more. I hope my job continues to be tolerable so I can justify staying here.

I hate the world and everything in it. Mom finally got us evicted with all her screaming, and is blaming it on dad and her boyfriend. To be fair they also suck. But she won't take responsibility apart from saying she's sorry and wishes she were dead.

Now, my brother and I will be fine, we can and likely will just move in with our grandparents. We already weekend here so it's just a matter of moving our stuff. Though his fish tank might be an issue as it's salt water. Our cats can come up here too, there's plenty of room for them. More than our house actually.

And I'll be around people who are able to actually motivate me to do shit and start my adult life. (Executive dysfunction and depression have made me rather useless. And yes it's partially my fault, I understand this. Don't lecture me on that right now.)

Mom, though, I don't know where she'll go. I don't even... feel much about it. I'm just numb. I'm not upset, my brain just started thinking about the logistics of what me, my brother, and the cats will do while I listen to mom cry and say she did nothing wrong on the phone. I'm not sad, or particularly angry. I'm just numb.

Numb is normal. It can take a decade+ to process family shit, and it comes in stops and starts but as long as you're functional just focus on moving then afterwards make yourself a crash mat for landing and processing. Whatever that looks like for you. Just get out of what sounds like survivor mode and get settled. Everything else can fall in to place later.
She's not your responsibility.
At least you have your brother to go through it with and bear witness/provide a parallel POV. That seems to be helpful.

Moving with a fishtank has always been ok. I use polystyrene boxes to insulate my fish and stop to open the bags and give them air regularly. Just move them on the back seat of the car with no lids so the at least have some light and i can keep an eye on them. (But if he's saltwater, I'm sure he knows what he's doing anyway).

FWIW I've experimented and determined I can only do a week around my parents but we all have a great time if we microdose our time together to a day or less at a time. Most people I know are like this. It just took a miserable period of living with them to discover we actually like each other when we live as separate individuals.

 

[Bruce LaLiLuLeLo]

Job Applications turned up dead, shot down. Uni Applications as chugging along slowly, more dead than alive. I am losing hope, I hope the future is okay, I dont want to spend all my life coping with failure using video games.

 

[The_Gam3]

Job market seems deader than dead in my area. Also kinda sorta late on my rent. I should be worried more but I don't know where I am emotionally to be honest.

 

[missnaptime]

I've been dabbling in Christianity a touch since I've kinda been shunned at my shul for dating a Christian. They're really not very happy with me, but frankly i think it's stupid. They allow same sex marriage, but not interfaith? So stupid. So i've ended up learning more about it anyway because I want to be understanding of his faith, practices and beliefs and support him as best I can.

I've also picked up some good coping mechanisms for when I get anxious, which happens a lot. So, instead of ruminating about my fears, I thought about how I would act in the event of the worst possible event happening, and discovered I would approach it with the same sort of love I do now, sort of 'troubleshooting' them. I also wrote something to express my feelings in a constructive way and I feel a lot better and like I understand myself better. I like writing poetry sometimes, so I find it's useful, although I mainly write about cute animals like field mice and hedgehogs and things like that, not personal things about me and my relationships with others.

I may not understand God or his reasoning, but for the time I have the people in my life, I will love them to the fullest, do my best to do right by them, and cherish them. Even if I'm still a little afraid, I will choose to be brave and do my best. )

 

[missnaptime]

Thinking about God in general scares me. The thought that we are forever connected to this incomprehensible thing that created us scares me. Thinking about eternity scares me. Eternity is terrifying but also is non existence. Existing in general is just kind of terrifying if I think to much about it.

We are so blessed and so beautiful as individuals for this very reason. Beyond our comprehension, every millisecond on this earth our actions that are already known are blessed and cherished by God. We can be gone in an instant. How gracious is that sort of mercy, to let one of your children, let alone *billions* of them, roam free to make their own decisions, and to have only some of them come back to cherish you and come and talk to you when they need advice and guidance? That's absolute king level stuff. If I was God I would have lost my patience by now with everyone's tomfoolery.

 

[Betonhaus]

I made a little fuck up while at work and while my supervisor was helping me undo that fuckup we discovered I had made a bigger fuckup that would've been bad if it hadn't been caught. Then when I went rock something off the floor that I dropped my pants completely ripped apart right in front of my supervisor. And the drive home was super super icy and I still have to go back later to pick up the person I carpool with so today has been swell.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Work's been closed for the last 1.5 days because we got slammed with a giant winter storm and I could barely control my car when they sent us home early. I even hit my neighbor's SUV when I lost control at a blazing fast 5mph trying to turn onto my street. No damage thankfully and he helped push me when I was stuck.

That's one hell of a way to meet your neighbor.

 

[AnOminous]

ate dominos and threw up at 3 AM cause of it
Never eating dominos again.

Ate a Pizza Hut mini-pizza and boneless "wings." Was actually pretty okay for a change.

I even hit my neighbor's SUV when I lost control at a blazing fast 5mph trying to turn onto my street. No damage thankfully and he helped push me when I was stuck.

Had a minor dent incident in a parking lot a couple months ago. Pulled out and someone hit me. Luckily it was where there was already a dent (the car came with a couple hence its price).

We both got out of our cars somewhat belligerently. Technically if you rear-end someone you're presumptively the one at fault. However, I have to admit I barely looked back and pulled out too fast. We glared at each other for a second or two, then realized we were both white and just exchanged apologies and information. Neither of us put in a claim.

 

[TheRedChair]

How I'm doing....

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

We both got out of our cars somewhat belligerently. Technically if you rear-end someone you're presumptively the one at fault. However, I have to admit I barely looked back and pulled out too fast. We glared at each other for a second or two, then realized we were both white and just exchanged apologies and information. Neither of us put in a claim.

I didn't even rear end him, I front ended him. I was taking a right turn onto my street but then my car decided to slip and slide and it ended up being the ultimate torture test for my brakes. No damage and we talked it out thankfully.

 

[Brett DeLawyer]

I am having a Medical Event™ that superstition dictates I am not allowed to speak about until April. It is physically destroying me way more than last time, I am the most irritable I have ever been in my life, and have no one to talk to about it.

I want to peel someone’s face off and make someone else wear it like I’m in a gotdang Mexican cartel and I have no idea how to mitigate this feel. No one to talk to that will listen, no caffeine, no tylenol or similar pain relief meds, no smokes, no sleep (thank you toddler,) no hot baths, every smell is horrible, every food tastes horrible, I have lost 10lbs in a month without trying because everything is disgusting. Too cold to do anything outside. Too tired to move.

I know I asked for this, God, but why nearly every possible awfulness is dialed up to 11 right now I would really like to know.

 

[Overwritten Tapes]

I didn't even rear end him, I front ended him. I was taking a right turn onto my street but then my car decided to slip and slide and it ended up being the ultimate torture test for my brakes. No damage and we talked it out thankfully.

I once rear ended a truck that was trying to run a red light and braked at the last second. I barely tapped the metal bumper and put a small crack in mine. Dude got out smoking a blunt, we looked at both of our cars, agreed to let it go, and gtfo before any cops came.

 

[Justice Tony]

I’m doing great. I had something I was worried about and felt unprepared for today but I think I crushed it. God is good.

 

[huesofmercury]

meh thats really just about it

 

[Avocado Kin]

Y

So stop it.

I'll put aside my insufferable atheism for a moment and say that usually I think there's people who get some sort of comfort or solace in religion and belief, and that's ok. If it improves your life and hurts no one, that's good.

But you're here telling us that it's a source of anxiety and suffering. So why put that upon yourself? Think about why you believe it, challenge the assumptions that cause it, and try to release yourself from that self-imposed fear.

You’re not actually putting aside your insufferable atheism. Everything you’re saying here is insufferable and not helpful.

 

[Señora Airi]

8th straight 10 hr work day. I was down 1/3 of my workers for the lunch shift, so that sucked. Luckily they came in at dinner. Now I'm gonna crush some PBRs and hot pockets, then do some cleaning that needs to get done tomorrow.

 

[Patrick Bait-man]

Job Applications turned up dead, shot down. Uni Applications as chugging along slowly, more dead than alive. I am losing hope, I hope the future is okay, I dont want to spend all my life coping with failure using video games.

Job market seems deader than dead in my area. Also kinda sorta late on my rent. I should be worried more but I don't know where I am emotionally to be honest.

>be unemployed
>live in 2020s
>"GET A JOB YOU LAZY NIGGER!"
>submit 6 million job applications
>nothing

Lol, lmao even. I hate this gay world.

 

[Bruce LaLiLuLeLo]

>be unemployed
>live in 2020s
>"GET A JOB YOU LAZY NIGGER!"
>submit 6 million job applications
>nothing

Lol, lmao even. I hate this gay world.

Sometimes the corpo/startup will say shit like "oh this x person visited earlier who said he/she does xyz more and has abc more stuff but we rejected him/her. What more than that can you commit?". It's all so tiring.