The threads have become weirdly parasocial. Either they want to be a cows best friend and hope they're doing well or they want them to drop dead immediately and go to hell. There's not much fun is there?
It's genuinely just about having fun. When you're college aged, you still have at least 4 decades of work ahead of you. The work that is available to students is mostly low pay while there's always opportunity to join clubs or parties that will close their doors to you as you age. Simply put, it usually will not be possible to have the same type of fun once you leave college while you can always work low-pay jobs.
Got my job overlap payout. I spent most of it to reduce my modest student debt (by US standards). It'll be nice to be rid of it in a few months, but at the same time it's like.. then what? I'll just be putting my money into savings. I guess having no debt is good but it still feels odd to just start saving shit cause I don't spend it. I scour Steam for an excuse to buy new games cheaply and it's just not there. I invest with little chance I'll leave kids to pass it onto.
There's lots of people on here who get really agitated easily. There plenty of cows who deserve scorn, but I miss the ones who are just strange weirdos. Agree with you on the lurking part as one thread I lurked way before this account is dead.
That's why I stopped following the Pizzacake thread - there's only so many times I can take of a middling comic artist's takes and her cucky husband.
You just get used to pain.
Dude, why are you so dead set on the idea that the issue is you? You are not a fictional protagonist. Yes, you have have control over some parts of your life, but curveballs happen with everybody all the time. You get too many of them in a row and bam - you think it is going to be like that forever. Not everything is your fault.
So whose fault is it? Is it my parents for not raising me right that I don't have the self-discipline to move forward? Is it fate that dropped me off at the wrong time at the wrong place? Blaming anybody else besides me is pointless and it's just looking for a scapegoat to feel better about me, a grown adult being incapable of being one. I don't see anyone else to blame but me here, even if it's still counterproductive since I can blame myself all I want, I'm still not doing anything to change my life circumstances.
Nobody's. World isn't fair, it doesn't have to be.
You have, you just get bumps on the road.
So blaming only yourself somehow helps? Doesn't seem so.
Well, you can't be born as someone else far far away, but I've seen you trying stuff. And don't start with "it is not enough", your attempts show that you don't want to give up, you're just to nervous that another try is not going to solve everything or almost everything at once. I get it, I am anxious too. It is last day of summer and I wanted to go swimming, yet now I feel less like doing it. But you know what? Kicking myself won't help me craving it again like I used to. Yes, you can force yourself into doing stuff, but you can't force yourself into wanting or enjoying things. You have to let yourself feel free first.