How could Chris get into (better) shape?

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Get a big black man to chase him round the neighbourhood for a few hours a day.
 
There's a kickstarter going on right now for an omnidirectional treadmill that hooks up to vidya. That's the only way I think Chris would exercise and even then he still wouldn't buy it.
 
Anon said:
There's a kickstarter going on right now for an omnidirectional treadmill that hooks up to vidya. That's the only way I think Chris would exercise and even then he still wouldn't buy it.
Not even to play the included pack-in game, "China Chase"?
 
Kosher Dill said:
Anon said:
There's a kickstarter going on right now for an omnidirectional treadmill that hooks up to vidya. That's the only way I think Chris would exercise and even then he still wouldn't buy it.
Not even to play the included pack-in game, "China Chase"?

That would require effort.
 
Kosher Dill said:
Anon said:
There's a kickstarter going on right now for an omnidirectional treadmill that hooks up to vidya. That's the only way I think Chris would exercise and even then he still wouldn't buy it.
Not even to play the included pack-in game, "China Chase"?
The china's supposed to come to him. He's gonna be the househusband, remember? :tomgirl:
 
Marvin said:
Kosher Dill said:
Anon said:
There's a kickstarter going on right now for an omnidirectional treadmill that hooks up to vidya. That's the only way I think Chris would exercise and even then he still wouldn't buy it.
Not even to play the included pack-in game, "China Chase"?
The china's supposed to come to him. He's gonna be the househusband, remember? :tomgirl:

Chris as a househusband. :lol:
 
Is Chris aware that house-spouses are generally expected to clean?
 
Sex is pretty good exercise, so maybe Chris should get a girlfriend.
 
Crazy Pacer said:
Sex is pretty good exercise, so maybe Chris should get a girlfriend.

But that would be hard work for him. He doesn't even know what's "good exercise" is even if its simple as using the stairs to push on the balls of your feet up and down to stretch your legs out. His hardest exercise is standing while playing Guitar Hero and that's what he's good at so far. For him to try new exercises, its going to be tough but he has to try then he'll get used to it.
 
Coldgrip said:
CalmMyTits said:
... Chris won't do this on his own, unless something drastic happens in his life, like having an heart attack.

Would he even recognize that he was having a heart attack? It's been speculated that Chris must feel like crap all the time due to his poor health and no exercise, so I doubt he would realize he was having one. Hell, he'd probably just ignore the pain and chalk it up stress caused by the trolls.

That is a very valid point. Heart attacks can be sneaky sometimes, as they do not always come with the stereotypical chest pain and left arm pain. There's a real possibility that Chris could pass away from an heart attack simply by not recognizing the signs especially if the symptoms could be dismissed as other things (headaches, dizziness, nausea, shortness of breath)
 
CalmMyTits said:
Coldgrip said:
CalmMyTits said:
... Chris won't do this on his own, unless something drastic happens in his life, like having an heart attack.

Would he even recognize that he was having a heart attack? It's been speculated that Chris must feel like crap all the time due to his poor health and no exercise, so I doubt he would realize he was having one. Hell, he'd probably just ignore the pain and chalk it up stress caused by the trolls.

That is a very valid point. Heart attacks can be sneaky sometimes, as they do not always come with the stereotypical chest pain and left arm pain. There's a real possibility that Chris could pass away from an heart attack simply by not recognizing the signs especially if the symptoms could be dismissed as other things (headaches, dizziness, nausea, shortness of breath)

Considering his steady diet of garbage and soda coupled with a sedentary life style I'd be really surprised if he hasn't already experienced a minor heart attack.
 
You know, Chris COULD use Officer Kimmi as a yoga mat. Problem solved.
 
Chandler Cats said:
You know, Chris COULD use Officer Kimmi as a yoga mat. Problem solved.


What a lovely mental image. OPL attempting to do downward-facing dog on a worn out love doll.

That's me warped for the day. (:_(
 
Coldgrip said:
Considering his steady diet of garbage and soda coupled with a sedentary life style I'd be really surprised if he hasn't already experienced a minor heart attack.
He did say he had experienced "the bright light of death" or whatever even "during waking moments", so this may actually be accurate!
 
teheviltwin said:
Chandler Cats said:
You know, Chris COULD use Officer Kimmi as a yoga mat. Problem solved.


What a lovely mental image. OPL attempting to do downward-facing dog on a worn out love doll.

That's me warped for the day. (:_(


Sorry, couldn't resist... :heart-full:
 
Chandler Cats said:
teheviltwin said:
Chandler Cats said:
You know, Chris COULD use Officer Kimmi as a yoga mat. Problem solved.


What a lovely mental image. OPL attempting to do downward-facing dog on a worn out love doll.

That's me warped for the day. (:_(


Sorry, couldn't resist... :heart-full:

Don't say that too loud. Knowing Chris he'll read that and it will be the only advice he takes from this whole board!

On a side note, he'd never exercise because it's uncomfortable and hard.
 
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