How do I get a girlfriend?

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Wujime said:
I don't know where you are from, but in the first world just talking to people you don't know out of the blue makes you look like a giant desperate weirdo at best and a predator most times
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I am American and live in America. And I've never had a negative experience striking up a conversation with a stranger.

Wujime said:
Yeah first it was "get out of high school" then "just get a degree" and now "just get a job". No, this is all a cope, people who get gfs do it as drug addicted bums (like tarl)
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Uh, no. A job is a basic functional aspect of life. Sure, unemployed addicts can find (unemployed addict) girlfriends, but if you're not one then irrelevant. Don't look at these people as real people or things to emulate.

Wujime said:
Objectively in a better place than being Steve Carrell in the 40 yo virgin.
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Also better than a squashed bug on the bottom of your shoe. Or a rabbit picked off by an owl. But also not the only alternative version of life.

Wujime said:
Not when any bodycount is higher than yours and you'll inevitably find out when no hymen is there
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Lol, tell me you haven't had (much, if) sex without telling me you haven't had (much, if) sex.
 
Wujime said:
Yeah first it was "get out of high school" then "just get a degree" and now "just get a job". No, this is all a cope, people who get gfs do it as drug addicted bums (like tarl)
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chad slays at 14 while he's a dumb high schooler with zero cash, meanwhile betas are told to graduate with three degrees and build a $100k a year career before being worthy of female attention.
this kind of advice is typical woman advice - it won't make you any more attractive or get you any genuine affection or love, instead it's intended to groom you into being a useful sucker that can get exploited for betabux by women in the future (only after they're done slutting it up with chad of course)

Beelzebub's Lawyer said:
Reality is that the majority of men are cowards who will see a woman they really find hot... and they will never approach her and then make up a bunch of bullshit excuses as to why.
Be the one motherfucker who just doesn't get embarrassed by anything.
You see a 10/10? Walk up to her and say the cringiest thing you can think of, just for the hell of it.
Chances are, you will come across better than most men who tremble at the thought of talking to her.
Don't worry about the outcome, don't think about how to "win" this situation, just have fun.

Do this enough times and something will happen sooner or later.
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yeah something will happen sooner or later - you'll become known as a deranged creep who constantly harasses random women.
real life is not like those (staged) PUA videos on youtube.
 
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Wujime said:
Not when any bodycount is higher than yours and you'll inevitably find out when no hymen is there
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This sent me down a rabbit hole and I saw some unsettling ass pictures and I just cant believe it
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Are people really born like that all smooth and they gotta like, take a pair of scissors to it?
 
Sounds like you need:
SchuComic9P1.jpg
 
I see the "just grab one" answer is already taken.

Serious answer then is STOP GIVING A FUCK. You want a girlfriend.. treat women like a housecat. (Disclaimer this is for a girlfriend not getting laid)

If meet a new strange cat and you immediately lay into it, run at the cat, try to touch it, talk to it, chase it, be loud? That cat will be under a couch or on top of a bookcase wanting nothing to do with you. Women and cats sense the same energy and flee.

Instead stop giving a fuck. Like with a cat, be in the proximity of women but do other shit. Ignore them or barely acknowledge them. Be polite and funny but be there to do other stuff. Dont do any of that pickup culture neg shit just go hang out at a party or event and have a good time. The goal is not to meet women but just have fun near them. Cats and women will be intrigued, they will come investigate and then get your attention. Then meet their attention level with yours. Dont try to grab them suddenly or admit you like them. Polite conversation meet polite conversation. Match their energy. Increase the attention slowly.

Then once you cash in your v card you wont reek of it anymore and can be even more relaxed.

TLDR
Stop talking so much, stop being a spaz, stop thinking so much, stop chasing the pussy (cat or otherwise). Stand near women without being a weirdo and pet the one that jumps on you.
 
Just don't sing Erika to them if they're Jewish

Also don't say "Au Revoir Shoshana" if they're Jewish
 
ConsentAccidentVictimNo98 said:
Also don't say "Au Revoir Shoshana" if they're Jewish
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No see this supports my advice. Hans Landa acted totally disinterested in her, met her family, and then let her go without chase.. literally saying goodbye.

And she was like OBSESSED with him and couldn't stop thinking about him!

The nerd who wouldn't stop pursuing her? Shot dead.
 
rub cat food all over your body, filipinas love the smell of canned food.
 
BeardedWall said:
Serious answer then is STOP GIVING A FUCK. You want a girlfriend.. treat women like a housecat. (Disclaimer this is for a girlfriend not getting laid)

If meet a new strange cat and you immediately lay into it, run at the cat, try to touch it, talk to it, chase it, be loud? That cat will be under a couch or on top of a bookcase wanting nothing to do with you. Women and cats sense the same energy and flee.

Instead stop giving a fuck. Like with a cat, be in the proximity of women but do other shit. Ignore them or barely acknowledge them. Be polite and funny but be there to do other stuff. Dont do any of that pickup culture neg shit just go hang out at a party or event and have a good time. The goal is not to meet women but just have fun near them. Cats and women will be intrigued, they will come investigate and then get your attention. Then meet their attention level with yours. Dont try to grab them suddenly or admit you like them. Polite conversation meet polite conversation. Match their energy. Increase the attention slowly.
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Women are cats yaaaah.
I don't think this works. Cats like me but women hate me all the same. All I can attract is cats. Maybe I should add a cat to my pfp. Think it would go well with all the cheese?
BeardedWall said:
Then once you cash in your v card you wont reek of it anymore and can be even more relaxed.
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This doesn't always work either.
 
thyme said:
Are people really born like that all smooth and they gotta like, take a pair of scissors to it?
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I remember a news article of a turkish (I think?) girl that didn't have a hole in her hymen. She thought she didn't have her period yet, when in reality it was building up inside of her. Eventually she got sick and doctors had to drain a few months worth of stale period blood from her.
 
Hi FreeRoss,how's being a morbidly obese mentally ill small dicked chink who wants to rape and kill his mom going?
 
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