How is the kiwi above you in bed?

Talks a big game about oral skills but when he gets down there doesn't know how to do anything besides some stupid tricks like tonguing the alphabet.
 
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A slice of southern fried goodness from Texas. Very curious about regional sex acts, like when you put a flag in my ass.
 
You can blitzkrieg up my Third Reich any day after that performance.
 
I won't say much but I will say this: we've both been excommunicated by the catholic church and the pope cried when he witnessed our sex tape.
 
I nearly collapsed from exhaustion. The woman is insatiable. 10/10 would get trapped in the jungle any day of the week with her again.
 
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I was the first of his "hat trick"... He fucked a bowler hat and a flat cap later on, but told me that I was the "best fit" out of the three.
 
Does things with her body science does not allow, gave her my hat.
 
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Brought a whip to impress me when I was expecting chains. 5/10

And had no snazzy hat. 4.5/10
 
He..he did things to me!.... Oh god.... I've already said too much!
 
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Very submissive. The nurse outfit was a nice fit, however.

Would try again.
 
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Well the prehensile penis came as a bit of a shock but would bang again.
 
Was into some weird stuff, but was very creative, I'll admit.
 
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Our "dinner" was trying out nyotaimori on each other, but it ended on a sour note when we spilled some soy sauce on the sheets and a poison ivy attack from the (supposed) decorative leaves. Nevertheless, we had some more kinky fun applying the aloe vera on the rashes.
 
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Dr W said:
Confused when I asked about her eye size. Still decent, however.
Click to expand...
Dragged me into an alley and anally violated me with an old shoe. Or was that just a dream I had? Either way, 10/10.
 
After we did oral, he said that I'd have to "wait for the next part." Whatever that means.
 
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The robes and chanting were a bit odd. I left when she busted out a tub of goat's blood and told me to help consecrate the altar to her dark lord.
 
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