I bought a pants, AMA - with zipper!

Solution
Why did you get a pair with a zipper? We all know you aren’t potty trained.
It has that flappy thing on the back so no more accidents.
They sell pants in your size? are you sure you didn't buy a tent?
34x29 is normal, fuck you!
How easy is it to operate the butthole flap
Two words: velcro. I've already mastered its operation.
How many stickers and tags were there on said pants?
I put a bunch of cool stickers on them already but I won't count them.
Why did you get a pair with a zipper? We all know you aren’t potty trained.
It has that flappy thing on the back so no more accidents.
They sell pants in your size? are you sure you didn't buy a tent?
34x29 is normal, fuck you!
How easy is it to operate the butthole flap
Two words: velcro. I've already mastered its operation.
How many stickers and tags were there on said pants?
I put a bunch of cool stickers on them already but I won't count them.
 
Solution
I have a really long butthole. Are these "pants" able to be made to accommodate such a butthole? I have gone nude from the waist down all my life because I am shaped differently to normal people and Mother always said I would never be able to wear leg shirts. Strangers usually just think its a tail, except for one time when I had downtown diarrhoeah and a black Homeless shouted, "that nigga shittin out his mothafuckin tail!". Then everybody looked. I couldn't leave the home anymore
 
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