If Earth was an app and you could give it an update, what would you do?

[LiaLongShong]

Merge two countries together, spawn an actual monster in Loch Ness, resurrect Elvis but he can't enter Earth's atmosphere and can only fly around in a spaceship?

 

[not william stenchever]

Fix the Islam bug.

 

[Vyse Inglebard]

Fix the Islam bug.

And the nigger bug while we're at it

 

[Pierre D'Olnique]

• Decreased Nigger aggression by 80%. Buffed the intelligence by 10% to compensate in order to prevent the WEWUZ spam.
• Increased Pajeet hygiene by 3000%.
• Disabled server transfers from Africa.
• Disabled server transfers from India.
• Disabled server transfers from Middle East.
• Players who transferred to Europe/the US/Japan in order to exploit early-game benefits will be forcibly relocated and have their accounts reset to level 1.
• Changed the outcome of event VII.XI.MCMXVII.
• Changed the outcome of event XXVIII.VI.MCMXIV, which also disables the event I.IX.MCMXXXIX.
• Reverted a lot of buffs given to women by accident.
• Hardlocked sex settings.
• Fixed the bugged respawn timer for Jesus Christ. The Last Judgment should now proceed as normal.
• Removed Jews from the game.

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

higher polycount for titties and ass

 

[The Cunting Death]

Fix autism bug

 

[DSHK]

Apply an update to remove the Earl Dube sprite from the game