If Phil Was Smart - Just for funsies - Don't take this thread too seriously friend

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If Phil was smart, he'd realized that the bankruptcy was a MAJOR wake-up call and get his life back on track. He'd go "You know what, I got damn lucky by having all of that debt wiped off. Let's downgrade my lifestyle: sell the khando, pay off what's left on it, move into an apartment, and get a actual job. Midfirst wants their money and it's just easier to get myself prepared."
 
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If Phil was smart about his cat:​

1) Buy Jasper toys so he can play around alone. Or hell, spend time with him!
2) Buy cheaper cat food. Phil begs for money to buy Jasper food almost every day.
3) Speaking of litter, use shopping bags and dump them into the normal trash *
4) Don't spray the cat with water near the electronics! Never punish your cat. Ever. **

* He has a separate trash container in his garage, slowly filling it up. Basically keeping cat piss and poop for weeks!
** Phil never did any research about cats. He doesn't know anything about taking care of cats. Even basic shit.
 
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FoxVirus said:

If Phil was smart about his cat:​

1) Buy Jasper toys so he can play around alone. Or hell, spend time with him!
2) Buy cheaper cat food. Phil begs for money to buy Jasper food almost every day.
3) Speaking of litter, use shopping bags and dump them into the normal trash *
4) Don't spray the cat with water near the electronics! Never punish your cat. Ever. **

* He has a separate trash container in his garage, slowly filling it up. Basically keeping cat piss and poop for weeks!
** Phil never did any research about cats. He doesn't know anything about taking care of cats. Even basic shit.
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LTG and DSP have another thing in common. They both treat their cats pretty poorly.
 
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tripmix said:
If Phil was smart he would realise it doesnt matter if you dox someone to 34250980948024820398420948204820498204820 people or 3 doxing is doxing. Leaking info is still leaking info.

Why the fuck do you even have people sending you driving licenses in the first place?
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why would phil do that if it can be easily verified as himself doing it.
i wonder if his life could be made easier with pseudonyms and alt accounts that aren't seemingly related to himself. play the plausible deniability card.
 
goku123 said:
why would phil do that if it can be easily verified as himself doing it.
i wonder if his life could be made easier with pseudonyms and alt accounts that aren't seemingly related to himself. play the plausible deniability card.
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The day Phil doesn't use darksydephil/TheyCallMeDSP for usernames for things is the day a game has a character creator and he doesn't instantly make himself.
 
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on the topic of phil being smart, theirs a million moments in his life going all the way back to the days of wolverine figure when his life could have improved because of it.
but if phil was smart, he would have never lost the helicopter job, he would have switched to direct capture instead of pointing a camera at the screen, he would have actually paid rambo and howard a decent chunk for their contributions and for project 7, leana would have stuck around. he would have kept his mouth shut about her panic attack. not spend ludicrous amounts on useless junk and gatcha. actually get in shape, never made the isaac himler joke and became a member of channel awesome. phil might have been making in the low millions depending on when in his life he decided to become smart, so to speak.
 
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If Phil was smart:

He would start getting blood pressure checks regularly, minimize (or outright eliminate) his daily salt intake, become much more physically active, and cut down on sugars, gluten consumption, and maintain regular vitamin D intake (or get more sunlight). Does anyone know if he has health insurance? I have this feeling that he might have venous thromboembolism, which is essentially blood clots in his legs.
 
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FoxVirus said:

If Phil was smart about his cat:​

1) Buy Jasper toys so he can play around alone. Or hell, spend time with him!
2) Buy cheaper cat food. Phil begs for money to buy Jasper food almost every day.
3) Speaking of litter, use shopping bags and dump them into the normal trash *
4) Don't spray the cat with water near the electronics! Never punish your cat. Ever. **

* He has a separate trash container in his garage, slowly filling it up. Basically keeping cat piss and poop for weeks!
** Phil never did any research about cats. He doesn't know anything about taking care of cats. Even basic shit.
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God damnit Jasper get off the computer.


Also if Phil was smart he would have utilized his gambling addiction to make money off of it.
 
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Vapid_Idiot said:
(or get more sunlight).
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Phil has stated he is allergic to the sun. This is because he got sunburn while filming project 7 outside all day in the summer without sunscreen.
Vapid_Idiot said:
Does anyone know if he has health insurance?
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He has the cheapest plan available since you need to have insurance if you are a business.
Vapid_Idiot said:
I have this feeling that he might have venous thromboembolism, which is essentially blood clots in his legs.
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Uhh, no! This has been explained as the reason he needs to take so many breaks. He walks around his house for 20 minutes so he doesn't get blood clots.
 
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If Phil was smart...
  • He would work on rebranding and improve quality of stream, from software to setup to not look like some boomer who set up a camera in front of their mug in a shitty fluorescent, blank room
  • He would utilize his ~$200,000 Finance degree to actually, you know, solve his situation which he should be capable of doing
  • He would be wealthier in general by smartly spending his 6 figure income instead of shitting it out on brand new Corollas, base model BMWs, and gacha games
  • He wouldn't be bitching and moaning about making 6 figures from playing video games for 9 hours a day
  • The game might actually detect his inputs
 
If Phil was smart he would never think playing badly video-games was a job on the first place, but if he was a slightly more smarter IRL Phil he could agressively milk flavor of the week games and think ahead if something goes wrong.
 
If Phil was smart he would have waited a few weeks or months to buy a laptop and xbox to try and pass them as gifts, instead of buying them right after a begathon.
 
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If Phil was smart, he wouldn't turn on the a/c in his whole house when his waif is out at work.

He could just leave the AC on in the awffice but why cool the whole house?
 
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