Im contemplating my lawn.

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mindlessobserver

mindlessobserver

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jul 18, 2017
I am looking out over my lawn from the back porch. At first my thoughts were that it needs to be mowed soon. The second thought was that the advertisements for lawn care, turf building, grass seeds and so on are in full force. I've not really worked on this lawn since I bought my house last year. Since I got it in the middle of summer it never came up. Now though, it is ostensibly the time to do it.

It's definitely not the homogenous field of grass people expect. It's actually a hodgepodge of different grasses, crab grasses, succulents, pokeweed, invasive aylanthus, dandelions, butter cups and baby tree shoots.

Ostensibly right now I should be killing all these plants with fire and importing some grass seed and turf builder to make the perfect mat of green. But then I think to myself, "this is what autistic Boomers do." They spend thousands of dollars exterminating the native plants and then bring in non native plants that will die within a year and force a repeat of the process? Why?

Besides, the butter cups and dandelions are actually pretty. The local bees seem happy. There is a pine tree growing in the back corner that may be a Christmas tree here in the next few years. Why should I kill all these plants and replace them with expensive turf? Nah.

Except for the pokeweed and aylanthus. Those fuckers are going down.
 
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dont mow your lawn. its better for the environment that way. fuck the hoa and their bs rules on perfectly mowed lawns
 
That sounds like a perfect lawn.
 
Deadwaste said:
dont mow your lawn. its better for the environment that way. fuck the hoa and their bs rules on perfectly mowed lawns
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No HOA where live thank god. Don't even really have a neighbor that can bitch about it. The person closest to me is some old codger that keeps the house as a weekend retreat. I've suddenly realized I am free, and so are the native plants.

Ughubughughughughughghlug said:
Is this a metaphor for the Great Replacement?
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:thinking:
Deadwaste said:
dont mow your lawn. its better for the environment that way. fuck the hoa and their bs rules on perfectly mowed lawns
Click to expand...
Oh no, it still needs to be mowed in places. Last thing I need is roots undermining the house foundation.
 
I'm down with the fire stuff. Eventually those flowers will become too old to flower and will not be as pretty as intended, so by the time summer comes they will help contribute to the next season's coming.

If you want something nice but not high maintenance in terms of plants, I'd recommend reoccurring stuff like daffodils and irises. As long as they're in the same place and they have sufficient nutrients in the soil, they always come back at the right season, and you can always relocate them by digging up the bulbs or retrieving their seeds.
 
Americans and mowed lawns have always been so bizarre to me. You go through all the effort of maintaining your garden, but instead of growing food you can eat, or having plants that smell or look good and improve mental health, you just keep using energy to cut grass and produce nothing.

Sadly for my house everything is paved over (a travesty), but I recommend going for the cottage garden aesthetic if possible. You get a nice garden, pollinators get something to help them, and some plants you grow could have benefits, e.g. Roses can be used in cooking. Granted you don't want invasive species, but mowing your lawn is fucking dumb. You picked a shit time for gardening though, since fertilizer is going up.
 
Deadwaste said:
dont mow your lawn. its better for the environment that way. fuck the hoa and their bs rules on perfectly mowed lawns
Click to expand...
The actual solution to the HOA question:
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In some municipalities it's actually illegal to not mow your lawn. If it's over six inches it's against the law. I don't know what the punishment is, probably just fines.
 
The story needs an epilogue. I planted some rose bushes on the perimeter and a redbud tree sapling in the middle. All rescues from the throw away pile at the grocery store.

All of them are now growing like crazy. I literally just dug a hole, threw them into it and boom.

The real star though is a bird started building a nest in the hanging flower pot facing the lawn. She put alot of work into it. Killed the flowers in the pot but whatever. Everyone was fascinated watching her work. Just listened to her do the "I am down for sexy times" song, and a male responded. Singing went for a good 5 minutes. Silence after that, and then the male did his "look at me bros" singing.

Probably gonna have some chick's in my flower pot this summer. Why do Boomers spray their lawns with poison again?
 
mindlessobserver said:
The story needs an epilogue. I planted some rose bushes on the perimeter and a redbud tree sapling in the middle. All rescues from the throw away pile at the grocery store.

All of them are now growing like crazy. I literally just dug a hole, threw them into it and boom.

The real star though is a bird started building a nest in the hanging flower pot facing the lawn. She put alot of work into it. Killed the flowers in the pot but whatever. Everyone was fascinated watching her work. Just listened to her do the "I am down for sexy times" song, and a male responded. Singing went for a good 5 minutes. Silence after that, and then the male did his "look at me bros" singing.

Probably gonna have some chick's in my flower pot this summer. Why do Boomers spray their lawns with poison again?
Click to expand...

Epilogue needs an epilogue. What kind of succulents, and what kind of birds? Also, we're going to need photos when the eggs hatch and you have fuzzy babies bimbling about your yard. :heart-full:
 
Does anything not get more interesting the more you pay attention to it? Does anything not get more interesting the more other people are interested in it? That is to say, why aren't we all slipping down holes? And how much good can we do by paying attention to this world, and what's a responsible level of attention to banish into the depths? I guess I'm excluding the possibility of these holes tending towards reality, I feel like that'd be too fortunate.
 
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