I'm going to get fired from my job, what should I do?

[WinchesterPremium]

Boss brought me into his office and told me "Get Gud Newfag" then poured my coffee down the drain I see the end of the line

 

[SNU]

Don't worry. They can't fire you without your consent.

 

[The Magnificence]

The only appropriate response would have been to immediately whip our your hog and piss on his desk. Too late now, of course, but something to keep in mind for the future.

 

[Penis Drager]

Get a better job.

 

[SCSI]

If you're a programmer, delete all documentation you've written (lol doco) and replace all comments in your scripts with helpful things like "#Does something", "#Very important, do not change!", "#<name of coworker you hate most> helped write this." Bonus points for that last one if the script is in Perl.

 

[Punished Benis]

Put clear gelatin mix in the office toilets.

It's like the old plastic wrap trick, but a million times harder to fix.

 

[MysticLord]

Raep him.

If you're a programmer, delete all documentation you've written (lol doco) and replace all comments in your scripts with helpful things like "#Does something", "#Very important, do not change!", "#<name of coworker you hate most> helped write this." Bonus points for that last one if the script is in Perl.

Better to replace 10% of the documentation with completely wrong info, forcing them to review all of it. 10% of the effort, 100% of the hassle.

Put clear gelatin mix in the office toilets.

It's like the old plastic wrap trick, but a million times harder to fix.

Tell me more about this.

 

[Haint]

Nut up and get gud.

 

[Joe Swanson]

Shit on his desk to assert dominance

 

[SaintChristopher69]

Turn on all the fire alarms and run.

 

[Manul Otocolobus]

Shit on his desk to assert dominance

Unfortunately, that is actually a crime, and they can actually figure out who it was from DNA in the shit. This all actually happened to a woman in the UK who did it.

Sometimes modern science works against our best interests.

 

[WinchesterPremium]

Accept your fate and start an only fans

There seems to be a high demand for me to take a dump on my boss's desk, I'll film it and put it on only fans! I've found my niche!

 

[Persian Carpet Salesman]

 

[Caddchef]

Go out in a blaze of glory, shit on his desk.

 

[TomServo]

Maybe take their advice and git gud scrub?