Is it too late for me?

[constant exposure]

Ever since I was young, about age 5, I’ve been infatuated with being a girl. Then once puberty hit I started masterbating to crossdressing and for the past 10 years I’ve only masterbated to mainly mtf transformation. I could probably count on one had the times I’ve deviated from that and watched “standard” porn.

I’m a good looking guy and I like who I am as a man but anytime I start to get aroused my want to transition hits me like a truck. After I finish I’m appalled and ashamed and want nothing to do with transition. Yet it never fails to creep back into my mind.

I know that I have AGP and it is something that I will have to deal with but I want to be able to consistently be confident as a man and have a loving girlfriend and a family. Can I overcome this? Or have I done too much damage as is?

I’ve been struggling with this for years and any insight would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Glad I couldn't help]

Yes.

 

[Lurkism]

If I could react TMI I would

 

[Penis Drager]

Where is this pasta from?

 

[The Cunting Death]

Yes

 

[Nom Carver]

no it's fucked

 

[Pope of Degeneracy]

It's never too late to do the hokey pokey

 

[naught sock account 1]

You will never be a real woman. You have no womb, you have no ovaries, you have no eggs. You are a homosexual man twisted by drugs and surgery into a crude mockery of nature’s perfection.

All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your ghoulish appearance behind closed doors.

Men are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed men to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even trannies who “pass” look uncanny and unnatural to a man. Your bone structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunk guy home with you, he’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your diseased, infected axe wound.

You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.

Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a man is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably male.

This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

 

[Positron]

Don't listen to the above poster. Transition will be the second happiest decision you'll ever make in your life, and will pave the way to the happiest decision you'll ever make in your life -- suicide.

 

[IAmNotAlpharius]

IMO anything can be overcome if you want it enough.... Also find other hobbies than wanking off and a job if you don’t have one. If you’re too busy to think, you won’t have time to be depressed, and you’ll feel a lot more accomplished.

 

[Niggernerd]

You're mentally retarded but it's okay, if you find jesus he will teach you to be normal.

 

[Jones McCann]

Stop watching porn.