James Rolfe / James D. Rolfe / Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) / Rex Viper and Cinemassacre / Screenwave - Now with not much grieving about a 41-year old man still making videos on YouTube. We're the balls on the dick.

[Staffy]

Unfortunately they're doing it because of YouTube algorithm.

Is that true though? There are still YTers that don't do this. Cr1tikal comes into mind.

And get ready for more milk down the line! The sooner they continue, the better. AVGN/Cinemassacre, as sad as it is, is just a burning train at this point, might as well watch it run down the tracks blazing

 

[José Mourinho]

Is that true though? There are still YTers that don't do this. Cr1tikal comes into mind.

And get ready for more milk down the line! The sooner they continue, the better. AVGN/Cinemassacre, as sad as it is, is just a burning train at this point, might as well watch it run down the tracks blazing

Just noticed these completely unnecessary "redone" thumbnails. I know it's not the end of the world, but they're just so tacky...

Posted in r/TheCinemassacre by u/CantaloupeTrain • 293 points and 133 comments

old.reddit.com

Just noticed these completely unnecessary "redone" thumbnails. I know it's not the end of the world, but they're just so tacky...

Posted in r/TheCinemassacre by u/CantaloupeTrain • 302 points and 133 comments

web.archive.org

 

[Raging Capybara]

Slobwave is the genius of the muh algorithms and SEO, just trust these guys!

They are so good at optimizing organic engagement on Youtube that the channel's monthly viewership plummeted since they took control of everything and started changing the video's thumbnails.

 

[BrunoMattei]

On the subject of AVGN reviews you disagree with: I re-played Silver Surfer on the NES. It's really not a bad game. It's hard for sure but par for the course if you've played shmups. Curious on the thoughts shmup players familiar with the Jap shit may have on Silver Surfer @Frank D'arbo . The hitbox on the Surfer is incredibly bias and half the time you die because you touched a part of the environment but otherwise it's a fine shmup. The one thing he never mentioned in the review is that you have a Bomb powerup and can use it by hitting Select. And you always start with a Bomb powerup after you die. The Bomb kills everything on screen excluding bosses and really helps in tricky spots. The weird thing is that the bosses are piss easy like an entirely different person designed the bosses independent of whoever designed the preceding level. The ending is a cop out and you expect the Surfer to fight Galactus but NOPE. Just some text is all you get.

Another one is Top Gun 2 which is a very fun game. It's hard but it's very good. I thought he would have addressed that in his re-review of old games he covered but he never mentioned it.

 

[moments fade pain remains]

Has Power of Love been ruined by Rex Viper for you, or am I the only one? I was watching a review of a movie on youtube and Power of Love got mentioned and, for a fraction of a second, I was like "Why would you mention them?" I get that this sounds autistic, but I don't want such a song to be ruined for me.

 

[Pissmaster]

Has Power of Love been ruined by Rex Viper for you, or am I the only one? I was watching a review of a movie on youtube and Power of Love got mentioned and, for a fraction of a second, I was like "Why would you mention them?" I get that this sounds autistic, but I don't want such a song to be ruined for me.

I don't ever like to listen to parody music like that specifically because it might make me think of it when I hear the actual song.

 

[Raging Capybara]

Has Power of Love been ruined by Rex Viper for you, or am I the only one? I was watching a review of a movie on youtube and Power of Love got mentioned and, for a fraction of a second, I was like "Why would you mention them?" I get that this sounds autistic, but I don't want such a song to be ruined for me.

For me, Vex Zipper ruined Push it to the Limit. I still can't believe Justin did the backing vocals for that.

 

[Bob Loblaw Law Blog]

On the subject of AVGN reviews you disagree with: I re-played Silver Surfer on the NES. It's really not a bad game. It's hard for sure but par for the course if you've played shmups. Curious on the thoughts shmup players familiar with the Jap shit may have on Silver Surfer @Frank D'arbo . The hitbox on the Surfer is incredibly bias and half the time you die because you touched a part of the environment but otherwise it's a fine shmup. The one thing he never mentioned in the review is that you have a Bomb powerup and can use it by hitting Select. And you always start with a Bomb powerup after you die. The Bomb kills everything on screen excluding bosses and really helps in tricky spots. The weird thing is that the bosses are piss easy like an entirely different person designed the bosses independent of whoever designed the preceding level. The ending is a cop out and you expect the Surfer to fight Galactus but NOPE. Just some text is all you get.

Another one is Top Gun 2 which is a very fun game. It's hard but it's very good. I thought he would have addressed that in his re-review of old games he covered but he never mentioned it.

lots of games he fails to mention basics

 

[Pissmaster]

On the subject of AVGN reviews you disagree with: I re-played Silver Surfer on the NES. It's really not a bad game. It's hard for sure but par for the course if you've played shmups. Curious on the thoughts shmup players familiar with the Jap shit may have on Silver Surfer @Frank D'arbo . The hitbox on the Surfer is incredibly bias and half the time you die because you touched a part of the environment but otherwise it's a fine shmup. The one thing he never mentioned in the review is that you have a Bomb powerup and can use it by hitting Select. And you always start with a Bomb powerup after you die. The Bomb kills everything on screen excluding bosses and really helps in tricky spots. The weird thing is that the bosses are piss easy like an entirely different person designed the bosses independent of whoever designed the preceding level. The ending is a cop out and you expect the Surfer to fight Galactus but NOPE. Just some text is all you get.

Another one is Top Gun 2 which is a very fun game. It's hard but it's very good. I thought he would have addressed that in his re-review of old games he covered but he never mentioned it.

Silver Surfer's one of those games where it would have been a whole lot better if they simply made it so holding the shoot button autofires, and if they allowed you to make one or two mistakes before you die. Really, really simple stuff for an otherwise good game with a top-tier soundtrack. This kind of stuff would have been trivial to patch in before launch, and it's a little ridiculous just how many NES games could have been improved with such tiny QoL improvements.

 

[BrunoMattei]

Silver Surfer's one of those games where it would have been a whole lot better if they simply made it so holding the shoot button autofires, and if they allowed you to make one or two mistakes before you die. Really, really simple stuff for an otherwise good game with a top-tier soundtrack. This kind of stuff would have been trivial to patch in before launch, and it's a little ridiculous just how many NES games could have been improved with such tiny QoL improvements.

Yeah, a powerup that gave you an extra health point would have gone a long ways. And that's something most shmups do for the player.

The worst offender to me is NES Batman where the only way to get back health is to farm enemies. That could have been fixed if they placed health drops in specific parts of the map or made it so those enemy-spawning things that drop the little robots dropped health more frequently. I love NES Batman but that is the #1 problem with that game.

 

[Raging Capybara]

Silver Surfer's one of those games where it would have been a whole lot better if they simply made it so holding the shoot button autofires, and if they allowed you to make one or two mistakes before you die. Really, really simple stuff for an otherwise good game with a top-tier soundtrack. This kind of stuff would have been trivial to patch in before launch, and it's a little ridiculous just how many NES games could have been improved with such tiny QoL improvements.

But then how they would make money selling turbo controllers or renting games?

 

[Korpon]

On the subject of AVGN reviews you disagree with: I re-played Silver Surfer on the NES. It's really not a bad game. It's hard for sure but par for the course if you've played shmups. Curious on the thoughts shmup players familiar with the Jap shit may have on Silver Surfer @Frank D'arbo . The hitbox on the Surfer is incredibly bias and half the time you die because you touched a part of the environment but otherwise it's a fine shmup. The one thing he never mentioned in the review is that you have a Bomb powerup and can use it by hitting Select. And you always start with a Bomb powerup after you die. The Bomb kills everything on screen excluding bosses and really helps in tricky spots. The weird thing is that the bosses are piss easy like an entirely different person designed the bosses independent of whoever designed the preceding level. The ending is a cop out and you expect the Surfer to fight Galactus but NOPE. Just some text is all you get.

Another one is Top Gun 2 which is a very fun game. It's hard but it's very good. I thought he would have addressed that in his re-review of old games he covered but he never mentioned it.

Tbf James did later on say on the James and Mike Monday video of that game that he actually does enjoy the game and likes the difficulty, just found it had some BS in it as mentioned.

 

[Ron Jeremy Stan Account]

Has Power of Love been ruined by Rex Viper for you, or am I the only one? I was watching a review of a movie on youtube and Power of Love got mentioned and, for a fraction of a second, I was like "Why would you mention them?" I get that this sounds autistic, but I don't want such a song to be ruined for me.

Not quite yet, exactly – however, it's hard for me to enjoy Hearts on Fire the same way again.

 

[The Cunting Death]

On the subject of AVGN reviews you disagree with: I re-played Silver Surfer on the NES. It's really not a bad game. It's hard for sure but par for the course if you've played shmups. Curious on the thoughts shmup players familiar with the Jap shit may have on Silver Surfer @Frank D'arbo . The hitbox on the Surfer is incredibly bias and half the time you die because you touched a part of the environment but otherwise it's a fine shmup. The one thing he never mentioned in the review is that you have a Bomb powerup and can use it by hitting Select. And you always start with a Bomb powerup after you die. The Bomb kills everything on screen excluding bosses and really helps in tricky spots. The weird thing is that the bosses are piss easy like an entirely different person designed the bosses independent of whoever designed the preceding level. The ending is a cop out and you expect the Surfer to fight Galactus but NOPE. Just some text is all you get.

Another one is Top Gun 2 which is a very fun game. It's hard but it's very good. I thought he would have addressed that in his re-review of old games he covered but he never mentioned it.

Sorry for the late reply.
For an NES Shmup, yeah sure it's tough but as you said, its only because of the Hitbox. You do get used to it after awhile.

Personally it's not even in the top 10 hardest shmups I've played.

 

[AsianChris]

i know what you mean. I forget what IUPG one it was (it wasn't scripted, but off the cuff), but he sounded mad depressed.

he then went back to scripted IUPG's (claimed he wasn't depressed)...then said he'd start doing less scripted reviews, finally burning out and here we are.

From the last one, just look at his face and tell me if it's not from a broken man:

 

[RiceofSkywalker]

https://web.archive.org/web/20211223123112/https://old.reddit.com/r/TheCinemassacreTruth/comments/rmjgax/looks_like_a_fan_of_the_nonassholish_variety_got/

I found this comment interesting:

I know it's on the internet (and worse, Reddit), but if what this guy claims is true, I got to give James credit where it's due, he sounds decent and genuine. Too bad his choice of management is shit.

 

[Pissmaster]

I found this comment interesting:

I know it's on the internet (and worse, Reddit), but if what this guy claims is true, I got to give James credit where it's due, he sounds decent and genuine. Too bad his choice of management is shit.

I actually did write him an email like a decade ago thanking him for his videos when I was going through a rough time myself, and he never replied. I've never heard other stories about him getting back to anyone until just recently, either.

 

[Jan Ciągwa]

-If CinemassacreTruth is so annoying just ignore it?

Shut the fuck up about CinemassacreTruth already, Justy!

 

[José Mourinho]

I decided to do a rewatch of every single AVGN episode, give my thoughts on each of them, and then rank them. For each post, I'll give my thoughts on every episode from each season, give a ranking of the episodes in that season, and then at the end I'll give a full ranking for all episodes. Be prepared for some hot takes here and there. Let's begin......

Spoiler: Season 1: 2004, 2006

1. Castlevania II: Simon's Quest

• "This game sucks." And what a way to start off the series. Still a good video, even when it's 17 years ever since it's recorded on a VHS tape. I really like how the review involved him keeping on complaining about the message boxes that kept on popping up. ("I mean, in real life I don't have to stop in my tracks when the sun sets and a fucking box doesn't pop up in the air.") Nothing much else to say, it's simple but still aged well.

2. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

• The first time we saw the Nerd on camera. In terms of reviewing the game, it's much less compared with the first episode, heck, the game footage only lasts for 1 minute and 11 seconds, as the whole point of the episode was about "A concerned video game nerd warning everyone else not to play this awful game", and even then it's still alright. I'm personally ranking this one below Castlevania II in this list however mainly because I liked the review aspect part of the first episode more.

3. The Karate Kid

• For some reason when trying to search for this episode on YouTube, you'd usually get the higher quality one from "Cinemassacre Clips" instead of the original one from "Cinemassacre", and the latter one for me is really hard to find if it's only done via YouTube search, and I only managed to find the original thanks to a playlist. Anyway, this is the first episode where we finally see the name of our main character: "The Angry Nintendo Nerd". This is better compared with the previous two, it combines the review-focused aspect from the first episode, with the parts involving the Nerd himself from the second episode. Apparently James said so himself that in the review he purposely ran into the enemies to make it look harder, but even as such it still doesn't affect my enjoyment for this episode. We already knew the full story of what comes next: This was supposed to be the last in the trilogy, but then it later turned into a very popular web series that lasted for hundreds of episodes, and still going, and that next one leads us to......

4. Who Framed Roger Rabbit

• Much shorter compared with the previous three, but still entertaining. This one focused a bit more on the jokes (e.g. The phone call exchange between AVGN and Jessica Rabbit, the buildup for him to punch people in the game), but still showcased some of the flaws of the game. That brief part where you can see the Nerd trying to input the first few letters of the long password really gets a good laugh from me. I'm putting this one above Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde because I find the review aspect better, but below Castlevania II: Simon's Quest because personally it could've been longer.

5. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

• The first episode where we see the title card thanks to Mike Matei. This is the best one so far among the five episodes, the jokes land really well and the review aspect for me is even better compared with The Karate Kid. This is also the episode that later gave us classic quotes such as "You can just walk over it", "Cowa-fucking-piece-of-dogshit" along with the amazing end rant. No surprise to see how this episode later used to become the most popular video on Cinemassacre until many others beat it, but still remains to be one of the most popular ones.

6. Back to the Future

• Here it is, the episode which had several lines to be later used as part of the lyrics for his theme song. (e.g. "I'd rather have a fucking buffalo take a diarrhea dump in my ear", "I'd rather eat out the rotten asshole of a roadkill skunk") This is also the first episode where the Nerd himself reviewed more than one game, with the main focus being the first one for the NES, with its sequel not being explored much. Good episode overall and the scenes from the films really spiced it up. Ranking this one below Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but above The Karate Kid.

7. McKids

• The first time we got to hear the wonderful theme song thanks to Kyle Justin. Compared with the previous episodes however, this one felt lacking. Some of the parts in the episode were really weird, such as him mentioning he had ADD, the different names for "1-Ups", and you can actually see the infamous Loco Bandito (5:13) here. Mixed bag really, bottom of the list so far. At least Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is a fine episode from start to finish, this one despite being still okay, it's just that I felt it's slightly less of a review and more towards the Nerd commentating while playing the game itself with bizarre parts in that playthrough.

8. Wally Bear and the No! Gang

• The Nerd explores an unlicensed NES game for the first time, and certainly not the last. Meh review overall, he didn't talk much about the game really, Ranking this one below McKids, making this bottom so far.

9. Master Chu and the Drunkard Hu

• The Nerd invited "Shit Pickle" (which actually appeared in an earlier video James made which was "Dorothy Goes to Hell") over to play another unlicensed NES game. The response to the pickle itself was rather divided: Some people loved it to the point it became an icon, some people just didn't like it, for me I'm indifferent. If you've never watched "Dorothy Goes to Hell" before, you'd definitely feel weirded out by a pickle saying "Shit" and "Pickle" over in this episode, and be like "What the fuck is this character doing here?". Most of the jokes of this episode really just involve the Shit Pickle saying "Shit" with some of them related to the poor quality of the game itself. I'm ranking this one above McKids because I find the review aspect better, but below Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde because it's just so odd. Pretty awkward to see that the bottom 3 episodes so far just so happened to be the ones with the theme song.

10. Top Gun

• A very good step up compared with the last three. The scenes where the Nerd tried to land the plane/getting the plane to refuel were fantastic, the jokes were really funny (especially the ones where the Nerd recreated what the next missions would be), and for some reason the parts where the Nerd critiqued about how boring the game was got some chuckle out of me ("90% of the time, you're just flying into a blank sky as little pieces of cotton come flying at you. Yes, I know they're supposed to be clouds."). Ranking this one above Back to the Future but below Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I personally think the Nerd should've looked into the two Top Gun games more especially with the 2nd one, but it's still a really amusing episode nonetheless. While you're at it, you should also check this video out showing the Nerd playing Top Gun at IMOG 2008.

11. Double Dragon III

• If there's a game that the Nerd should consider revisiting, this is one of them. Majority of the video usually consisted of him complaining how the game is difficult and there's really nothing else. Even if it's the entire point, there really should've been a lot more. The episode in retrospective really should've been about the Double Dragon Trilogy rather than just one game itself. Imagine if the Nerd reviewed the 2nd Back to the Future game, or the 2nd Top Gun game, in just one short video, you'd probably get something like this. Apart from the "Bimmy and Jimmy" moment, this episode is really forgettable. Bottom of the list so far. Even at least theWally Bear and the No! Gang episode had memorable parts like "Press Here (, You Dumb Fuck)" and the Nerd saying no to drugs while drinking beer.

12. Friday the 13th

• Really fun to see how James tried to incorporate horror elements (especially he's more of a horror movie-making nerd himself than a video game nerd) into this Halloween special. Really simple setting: It's just the Nerd stuck in purgatory in his own room playing Friday the 13th for the NES seemingly forever and he couldn't even bash the game at all nor even running away from it, or else he'd face death. The parody game over screen, watching the Nerd really trying not to hate the game make this episode top of the list so far. By the way, the ending song at the credits screen ("Man Behind the Mask") is muted when watching the episode today, which makes this a shitload of fuck.

13. A Nightmare on Elm Street

• The second AVGN Halloween special. That's right, 2 Halloween episodes in one season. Another simple setting: The Nerd is stuck in a bad dream being visited by Freddy, and playing A Nightmare on Elm Street for the NES. This is also the same episode that coined the nickname "Laughing Joking Numbnuts", which introduced us to the LJN company which became a recurring theme for the series. Even though the game nowadays is considered to be one of LJN's better games and considered to be not that bad, this is still a hilarious and entertaining episode. I also really enjoyed the extra effort James made for the "AVGN clones" segment, and considering he even played as Freddy in this episode for some parts, this is really a fun episode especially with the soul and effort involved. Ranking this above Friday the 13th and top of the list so far.

14. The Power Glove

• Continuing from the previous episode where the Nerd woke up from his nightmare, seeing himself wearing the Power Glove, the Nerd did a review on the Power Glove and testing it on several NES games. I really enjoyed the back-and-forth segments between the camera showing both the power glove in front of the TV to show how bad the Power Glove was, and the video game footage itself, which it'd take some reasonable effort to make these segments align well with each other. It might be just a simple review for a bad video game accessory, but the huge amount of effort makes this a very good episode. Ranking this above A Nightmare on Elm Street. Damn, it really keeps on going up from here.

15. Chronologically Confused About Bad Movie and Video Game Sequel Titles

• Holy shit what a long title name for an episode. This is the first episode where the Nerd renames himself from the Angry Nintendo Nerd to Angry Video Game Nerd, apparently in order to sell merch without getting in trouble with Nintendo. This one is alright, it's just AVGN ranting about confusing sequel titles for both video games and movies (most of the episode is him ranting about movies, after all James is more of a movie-making nerd himself than a video game nerd), with some of them just him fucking around (My favorite part of this episode was the one where he's complaining about the numberings for The Naked Gun series). "One of the things that really brings my piss to a boil is when there's a movie that has a whole bunch of sequels, all conveniently numbered, but then they suddenly decide to stop numbering 'em." Oh wow, that one really aged badly considering what happened to AVGN now. Ranking this above Top Gun for the tons of rants alone to make this rant possible, but below Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles since I still find the TMNT episode more entertaining.

16. Rocky

• There's two versions of this episode: The first one was the one originally available on YouTube (before being removed likely to avoid copyright issues) which had several movie scenes from the Rocky movie, had the Rocky soundtrack from it, scenes where the Nerd played all Rocky movies in his house, and the AVGN theme song. The second one was the one from the DVD which had none of these, but added a scene where the Nerd threw the game off the stairs. For this case, I watched a fanmade video which combined both versions into one, which is right here. As for the review of the game itself, there's nothing much to it, though it's still entertaining watching the Nerd reading from the manual, getting bored playing the training scenes, and getting frustrated beating Lang. Ranking this above The Karate Kid but below Back to the Future.

17. Bible Games

• The longest episode in this season, where AVGN reviewed several NES games based around the Bible, and Super 3D Noah's Ark/Super Noah's Ark 3D/Super 3D Fuck Farts on the SNES. The absurdity of the games being covered really adds a lot of charm to this episode (e.g. Noah being ridiculously strong, Baby Moses being thrown into the water, David punching the lion, the Nerd saying sheepy sheepy sheepy, blowing up a snowman in Bible Buffet, etc.) which makes this episode to be top of my list, and what a way to end the very first season.

Season 1 Rankings:

1. Bible Games
2. The Power Glove
3. A Nightmare on Elm Street
4. Friday the 13th
5. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
6. Chronologically Confused About Bad Movie and Video Game Sequel Titles
7. Top Gun
8. Back to the Future
9. Rocky
10. The Karate Kid
11. Castlevania II: Simon's Quest
12. Who Framed Roger Rabbit
13. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
14. Master Chu and the Drunkard Hu
15. McKids
16. Wally Bear and the No! Gang
17. Double Dragon III

And that was Season 1. Even though the episodes were at least 15 years old, most of the episodes still aged well and were still enjoyable and informative even to this day. The season started off pretty strongly, got a bit eh at the middle, but managed to be back to being entertaining at the last few. Even my personal worst one from this season I wouldn't even consider it completely bad either.

Tune in next time where I'd cover Season 2, which started from the Nerd's two-part movie review about TMNT III all the way to his Rambo review on the NES, with a bonus video crossover between the Nerd and Captain S.

 

[Jan Ciągwa]

Has Power of Love been ruined by Rex Viper for you, or am I the only one?

I feel the same about popular songs remixed for ads that play over, and over, and over again and slowly drive me insane while I'm just trying to buy some groceries.