I appreciate that even after all the accusations of sexual harassment and pedophilia, our brave and stunning JY still keeps all these sex toy reviews up on his website because this definitely doesn't contribute at all towards him looking any kind of way like someone who doesn't have great sexual boundaries.
So yes, this review is going to be a massive orgy of sex toys for Summer 2018. You girls asked for it, you girls got it.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that literally no one asked for this.
This bad boy will make you cum so much that you will be screaming Donald Trump’s name over and over, literally, this bad boy has a ton of power in it.
but...but why?? I dont get it? is this how JY orgasms? Is this something super patriotic American republicans do or something? Is JY secretly a super patriotic American republican? I just....this is...I'm a little at a loss for words. Unless you're literally fucking Donald Trump, I don't know why someone would scream his name? Did Donald Trump design this sex toy or something?
Put this baby on your pussy and you’ll be screaming.
Um...ok....
Battery life is phenomenal. This soft, flexible vibe will assist in a solo or partnered seduction. Experience ultra-powerful stimulation with this petite pleasure toy! Cycle through 5 intense settings of vibration with a single easy-to-use button.
They had to have paid him to say this. Literally no one talks this way. This is like when you're watching a TV commercial and two totally ordinary people are having a totally casual ordinary conversation like "Only this brand of dog food contains specially formulated Life Source Bits, a premium high-protein formula featuring 13 essential vitamins!"....If you can name one person in your life who actually talks this way, this person has autism.
The curved, ergonomic shape allows you to cup the vibe against your body or tuck it into your panties for hands-free excitement. The extreme flexibility ensures that it will fit perfectly against your unique, natural curves.
Unique curves like a clit that happens to dangle down 5 inches?
Made of premium silicone, the Pleasure Curve is non-porous and phthalate-free. Clean with mild soap and warm water and avoid use with silicone lubricants.
No, see there's that Paid Sponsored Commercial talk again. Nobody buys reviews like this. This information is what the product description is for.
I love the fact I can just tuck it in my panties and go to town with it. Super discreet and super comfortable for the most amazing orgasm ever. Your vagina deserves this! This product has an MSRP of $60! Get the Pleasure Curve Flexible 5x Vibe at XRBrands.com. Rating: 5/5
Greetings Fellow Females, this electronic device feels perfect inside of my clitoris. When I slap my cervix with this, it feels so amazing that I leak colostrum everywhere. I know how human bodies work.
This is a great product for any guy that wants to get hard, fast. Target the head of your penis for a vibrating massage! With super powered twin vibrating bullets and a super stretchy, head-encompassing sleeve, you can experience pin-pointed stimulation on one of the most sensitive areas of your body! Just slip the cup over the head of your cock and control the level of vibration with the easy-to-use speed dial on the wired controller. Boasting a strong motor, these two bullets help surround the tip of your cock in toe-curling buzzing bliss. Inside the cup are dozens of extra-large tickler nubs that will further tease your towards orgasm. How much pleasure can your helmet handle?
Awfully specific cock information, Jessica.
Also now I know you call your dickhead a helmet and I've decided I want to die.
I fucking love this clit stimulator! Gets my clitoris going like crazy, I literally fell in love with this product as soon as I saw it and started using it. This bad boy is by Inmi, and I can’t get enough of it. Just typing about it wants me to whip this bad boy out and start using it, I get wet just thinking about it. You can also insert the other end in your pussy for amazing stimulation.
Make sure you use a fleet enema to clean out your "pussy" first though or you'll get shit all over your penis vibrator.
The small end has incredible suction power that will take you past the brink of orgasmic ecstasy when you place it around your clitoris, or even a nipple!
Just be careful you don't suction your nipple too hard or you'll spray colostrum everywhere, am I right, fellow females?
The handle end is smooth for a comfortable penetration, with a curve that will target your G-spot upon insertion.
Soooooo it's a prostrate massager? I'm confused
Holy shit was the first thing I said when I saw this bad boy. My pussy got wet just looking at it and seeing the power that it can bring.
Is this code for anal leakage? Did he leave the fleet enema in too long?
The Thunderstick is so powerful, you have to plug it in for maximum power. Of course, my favourite level is when I turn it ALL the way up for orgasm power.
I bet his mother is super proud of him for starting his own business and making his own website, and the Cimorelli band and their fan base are super happy that this was their IT guy for so long.
Whether you are playing solo, with a partner, or even enjoying forced orgasm or orgasm denial play, the textured body ensures a secure grip.
I can't tell if this is more Sponsored Commercial Speak or if these are actual cursed thoughts coming from his depraved mind. Who you doing forced orgasm play with?
Not only does this vibe looks sexy, it feels sexy. I put this in my purse and whip it out when ever I need some vaginal stimulation in the middle of the day in a private place.
It's just the perfect thing if you're taking the ferry from Horseshoe Bay to Nanaimo and the bathroom is full of ten year old girls.
It’s small, discreet and full of power. I just wish it was easier to insert.
dude that base doesn't look super flared you will lose this thing in your asshole
Miniature, but mighty! This petite and discreet wand massager is perfect for travel, or even keeping in your purse!
For those busy females who need to masturbate on the go! You never know when and where you might need to masturbate!
Simple, but powerful. The Thunder Bullet can make your pussy growl like thunder.
The growling is the stray gerbil you left in there last time, please free Lemmiwinks and stop hitting him with dildos
This massive bullet delivers deep, rumbling vibration! Packing multi-speed buzzing capabilities for internal or external use, this sleek bullet was made for intense action. Experience the powerful vibration reverberating through the whole shaft! Use it on its own, or insert it in a penis sheath to create a customized vibrating dildo.
It took me a moment to realise that he meant that this is a bullet-style one that will insert into a dick-shaped dildo so that the dildo vibrates. I really thought for a split second that he was putting this in his dick somehow and I actually audibly said "oh my god."
This, this vibrator… is just freaking fantastic. I stick it down my panties and let Mimic take care of the rest. It feels so freaking good against my pussy and looks so luxurious. I rarely have to charge it, it just packs so much power and has a fantastic battery life. My body starts spazzing as soon as I use it, it just feels absolutely phenomenal.
gaurantee he's shoving this down granny panties.
I freaking love the Club Vibe 3.OH Hero. I tried it since January of this year and I had to include it in this review. It’s an anal vibrator, but can also be used in your tight little wet pussy.
i feel assaulted from simply having read those words.
Stay tuned for the next season of sex toy reviews in 2018!
please no