Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

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Guess Kat's weight.

  • >200 lbs.

    Votes: 22 3.5%

  • 200 lbs.-250 lbs.

    Votes: 125 20.0%

  • 250 lbs.- 300 lbs.

    Votes: 110 17.6%

  • Damn that's a huge bitch.

    Votes: 369 58.9%
  • Total voters
    626
its OVER brazy bros...

brazy.png
 
Oh no, where will the coomers find another hobo-thin, average skank with a bowling ball forehead to fap over???
 
I feel a little bad (emphasis on "a little") for all the dumb hoes who thought selling themselves online would be the ticket to never having to worry about money again.

Just saying, this is what happens when you "normalize" sex work, hoes; being a random insane hobo skank with a lot of filters and even more chemical dependencies ain't gonna cut it in the open ho market. You have to change with the times embrace local business if you want to stay ahead.
 
I know this might be dumb and many people have this idea. But I think Kat actually left him. I know Kat is slow but she could easily get any shitty job, and has proven to get new jobs after she loses one. Also Jasper hasn't been seen for months now. I know Dave wants to say its because Kat is home so Jasper stays with her but I don't buy it. Plus Jasper has been in Phil's room when Kat was home so I find it weird that she is home now and Jasper never goes to Phil. Although he says the door is closed, but I think that is a cover up. So I think she left him recently and took Jasper.

Now he is walking? Wouldn't that be time he would be spending time with his wife? He has said how important it is to be with her and that he has no time to improve his streams or anything else because he needs that bonding time with Kat. Now he has time to go for walks. Maybe he walks now for various reasons, maybe he thinks if he "exercises" that Kat will see he is a new better human being and take him back or the depression of Kat leaving him is too much so he walks to distract from that.

This is just a hunch and there is not much evidence of this but, we saw something similar happen when he and Pandalee broke up and when she left. I can't recall when was the last time we heard Kat talk with Phil during those live mic moments, but I believe it was a few months ago. So I speculate she left when Jasper started disappearing which was about 2 months ago I think. It could explain why he gets super annoyed recently when someone mentions Kat and her job status because it reminds him his horse galloped away from the barn.

Either way I am going to keep an eye of any odd behavior from Phil and anything he says about Kat. This wouldn't be the first time Phil lied to his audience that his significant other left him but played it as she was still home. But who knows.

Edit: Also when Phil goes on break or steps out of the room we never see Jasper come in and jump on his chair/boxes which he has done plenty of times before. Unless Kat has Jasper in a vice grip and never letting go.
 
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I would argue the only walking he does is into another room to play wwe. semantics
 
Kat would need a place to go though, and where is that? Any guy making more than Phail is going to want a younger, hotter woman than Kat. She certainly isn't living on her own or moving in to Brainless Mofo's van down by the river.

If Kat is tired of not getting any it's not like she'd be the first woman to cuck a man she despises yet refuses to leave. At least the Snort Fort affords her privacy, just shut the door and Phail won't have the balls to interrupt her. That weird stalker from behind photo of her playing Skyrim is proof of that.

Jasper's continued residence in the Snort Fort is the only way Phail could prove she's still there. Jasper becomes an outdoor kitty (stray) if Kat leaves and doesn't take him. He's not driving to a shelter and paying surrender fees.

Since we know Phail and/or dentheads read this thread expect Jasper Kitty to grace us with his presence any day now.
 
DukeMorty said:
I know this might be dumb and many people have this idea. But I think Kat actually left him. I know Kat is slow but she could easily get any shitty job, and has proven to get new jobs after she loses one. Also Jasper hasn't been seen for months now. I know Dave wants to say its because Kat is home so Jasper stays with her but I don't buy it. Plus Jasper has been in Phil's room when Kat was home so I find it weird that she is home now and Jasper never goes to Phil. Although he says the door is closed, but I think that is a cover up. So I think she left him recently and took Jasper.

Now he is walking? Wouldn't that be time he would be spending time with his wife? He has said how important it is to be with her and that he has no time to improve his streams or anything else because he needs that bonding time with Kat. Now he has time to go for walks. Maybe he walks now for various reasons, maybe he thinks if he "exercises" that Kat will see he is a new better human being and take him back or the depression of Kat leaving him is too much so he walks to distract from that.

This is just a hunch and there is not much evidence of this but, we saw something similar happen when he and Pandalee broke up and when she left. I can't recall when was the last time we heard Kat talk with Phil during those live mic moments, but I believe it was a few months ago. So I speculate she left when Jasper started disappearing which was about 2 months ago I think. It could explain why he gets super annoyed recently when someone mentions Kat and her job status because it reminds him his horse galloped away from the barn.

Either way I am going to keep an eye of any odd behavior from Phil and anything he says about Kat. This wouldn't be the first time Phil lied to his audience that his significant other left him but played it as she was still home. But who knows.

Edit: Also when Phil goes on break or steps out of the room we never see Jasper come in and jump on his chair/boxes which he has done plenty of times before. Unless Kat has Jasper in a vice grip and never letting go.
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Or he keeps the door shut because he voice annoys his unemployed MomWife
 
I never like to speculate on peoples relationships because you never know what goes on behind closed doors.

But the fact that Phil admitted on stream that both he and Khet forgot their anniversary…..how else to describe this marriage other than roommates with a title?
 
Cistern Rumbler said:
She ain't leaving until Phil is broke or dead, and even then it's more likely he'll be the one leaving the condo not her.

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100% Kat will never leave the snortfort. Kat has zero prospects outside of being a sponge to Phil. She's dumb as shit, zero charisma, comes from a broken home she can't go back to, she's not attractive enough to get a new man with money and I highly doubt she has any friends that would take her in if she were to leave. Her leaving Phil would mean she would be sleeping in a car like her insane sister. Rent prices in the greater Seattle area would force her to live out of her car or in some section 8 crime filled ghetto. She will stay in her separate office thing playing Skyrim for years only briefly seeing Phil in the hallways and during meals to make small talk.
 
Yep. Kat is fully nested up in the Snort Fort and unless (because she's a known cheater) she snags another mark, she's there for the long haul.

Kat and her cat-son seem to have the run of the condo too. Phil seems essentially trapped in his dusty office, not even allowed to leave the door open in his own fucking condo. Meanwhile her PS4 is posted up in the main living room with the couch.

Phil is a small man trapped in a small office stuck talking to retards for the rest of his life.
 
Cistern Rumbler said:
Yep. Kat is fully nested up in the Snort Fort and unless (because she's a known cheater) she snags another mark, she's there for the long haul.

Kat and her cat-son seem to have the run of the condo too. Phil seems essentially trapped in his dusty office, not even allowed to leave the door open in his own fucking condo. Meanwhile her PS4 is posted up in the main living room with the couch.

Phil is a small man trapped in a small office stuck talking to retards for the rest of his life.
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It isn't like he deserves any better than that, honestly.
 
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