Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

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Guess Kat's weight.

  • >200 lbs.

    Votes: 22 3.5%
  • 200 lbs.-250 lbs.

    Votes: 125 20.0%
  • 250 lbs.- 300 lbs.

    Votes: 110 17.6%
  • Damn that's a huge bitch.

    Votes: 369 58.9%

  • Total voters
    626
Personally, I'm of the belief that Kat is unofficially divorced from the goutmaster, opting to only visit the fort once or twice a week to keep up appearances. It would explain Phil's hands-off discussion of her.
 
Especially given the nonsense that is her having a job to begin with.
You think she's actually unemployed?

Personally, I'm of the belief that Kat is unofficially divorced from the goutmaster, opting to only visit the fort once or twice a week to keep up appearances. It would explain Phil's hands-off discussion of her.
What appearances? The whole reason we all speculate about her is a lack thereof.

Personally I just think she refuses to be one of Phil's Internet money magnets, and does her own thing.
 
Personally, I'm of the belief that Kat is unofficially divorced from the goutmaster, opting to only visit the fort once or twice a week to keep up appearances. It would explain Phil's hands-off discussion of her.
If they split up we'd know. The moment he'd get the opportunity, he's throwing her under the nearest bus blaming every bad idea he's had for the past however many years were her's.

Besides she has no reason to want to go anywhere and that's assuming that she'd have anywhere to go. She lives at the wahkando rent free, gets all her food paid for by a submissive piggy and any money she makes she gets to spend on herself. She has practically everything she wants and she's convinced piggy of a convenient excuse to never have to appear on stream. She has nothing to gain by leaving him and won't until Phil's "business" collapses.
 
If they split up we'd know. The moment he'd get the opportunity, he's throwing her under the nearest bus blaming every bad idea he's had for the past however many years were her's.

Besides she has no reason to want to go anywhere and that's assuming that she'd have anywhere to go. She lives at the wahkando rent free, gets all her food paid for by a submissive piggy and any money she makes she gets to spend on herself. She has practically everything she wants and she's convinced piggy of a convenient excuse to never have to appear on stream. She has nothing to gain by leaving him and won't until Phil's "business" collapses.
The one thing she might gain by leaving is the use of her social media and Youtube accounts again. I know Phil likes to pignotize with his entire "muh trolls" spiel but isn't it weird that a woman that age abandoned all of their known accounts and has no known internet presence? And this is someone that was happy to stream before moving in with Phil. It's all so convenient for the pig.
 
It's been discussed a billion times but I think it makes no sense to assume Phil made her hide her Internet presence when he simultaneously quite blatantly wanted to monetize her since the beginning.

More likely she just doesn't want to deal with the begative attention. She also likely has anonymous accounts since she watches a lot of YouTube.

Edit: lol "begative attention" what a typo. I'm leaving it as is.
 
You think she's actually unemployed?
I meant that it didn't make sense for her to feel the need to work. But on that note, given Phil's attempts to conceal how much she has been home lately, that is certainly a possibility. However, I'm not leaning that way, because I'm thinking more the following...
If they split up we'd know. The moment he'd get the opportunity, he's throwing her under the nearest bus blaming every bad idea he's had for the past however many years were her's.
Not if their arrangement involves her living elsewhere while he keeps paying her rent in order to keep her quiet about their separation. I think Kat is stringing him along, letting him think that her regular visits are a sign he can get her back. It would explain a lot, like the very few number of times we've had any physical proof someone else is in the condo, as well as his testiness over personal inquiries, the fact that she doesn't do anything for him, doesn't seem to ever be available, that time he rushed downstairs because he thought she came home early (probably excited she was there to stay for whatever reason), his lying about her work schedule, his bullshit "So my wife was a retard again today" stories, the list just goes on.

It's not impossible, Phil wastes money on all kinds of things, and would readily do so if he thought Kat might return to the fold. He's gullible as fuck, we've all seen it, numerous times, and that's just from when I started following the pigroach. I'm sure there's plenty more where that came from. As for motive on her part, what motive does she NOT have to pull a con on the con man? He didn't warn her about anything, and if he did tell her to scrub her online presence, it was for his protection, not hers, because it didn't spare her at all from the ridicule.

Of course it doesn't matter if any of this conjecture is incorrect, because the fun is in doing it, and Phil being unable to disprove it, or "win" even if he did. No emotions in this for me, I'm not Supercrazy. It's all about the laughs, so I'm having fun no matter what.
 
It makes perfect sense for Kat to work the bare minimum and have some financial independence. Especially if we're going with the 'platonic roommate' thing. No need to explain herself over personal purchases if it's her money.
That is indeed the only logical explanation to me. Of course, that's going with the thought of her living there. If she doesn't, then Phil doesn't have the slightest clue what she does, and that would explain why his ongoing narrative doesn't add up.
 
he's throwing her under the nearest bus blaming every bad idea he's had for the past however many years were her's.
uh, he has been. the chair spin, blowing bubbles, sour cream on a waffle that he has to rescue her from (I mean really, you intentionally make your wife look THAT stupid to the world?)
 
Doesn't add up in what way?
I'm referring mainly to how he doesn't have any real material to work with, and keeps weaving stories I don't believe. Like all the times she supposedly just stood there and stared at something, or when he talked about her getting shifted from department to department using a childishly exaggerated number like he always does, as well as the nonsensical concealment of her being home. Nobody lies about their spouse working fewer hours, after they just got done making them look bad without realizing it, when their very presence in the Snort Fort is in question. If Kat lived there and had fewer hours, Phil would not think to cover that up in the interest of making her look good. He clearly doesn't operate that way. He would prefer to try taking advantage of that, because speculation of her not being there offends his ego.

It's all bullshit, that Phil does a terrible job of coming up with, because she isn't there and he has no imagination. Or she is, and that's even worse. lol
 
What're the chances that Phil married a dumb retarded bitch that shoves food down the waste disposal and freezes up when it explodes, and works a shitkicking job with no stability...

...or...

That they're both carrying out some conspiratorial James The Lesser-tier arrangement wherein she's not even there anymore, Phil pretends she is while simultaneously hiding his bachelor blues, and Jasper is still there, AND no divorce papers have been filed...

......?
 
I do wonder what the hell she spends her money on. I know Phil is an unreliable narrator and he makes it seem like he's the government-assigned caretaker of a woman that has 62IQ but even then she never struck me as possessing even average intelligence and in the few sightings we have of her on stream from years ago she looked benzo'd out of her mind.

She makes 1.2k dollars a month on her part time job right? That's a lot of money if you spend almost all your free time indoors and your only hobby is playing Skyrim and whatever new AAA trash comes out while someone else gives you free room and board and pays for every other expense in the house. Even if you buy 5 new white haht pahpular AAA games that come out in a month that's still only 300 dollars spent, and like I said she doesn't strike me as someone who has the braincells required to put money away for a rainy day. Maybe she paid off those alleged debts she has that Phil talked about, maybe the snortfort is now filled with over 6 dozen fake stainless steel samurai swords she bought with her money, maybe she's just as much of a gacha fiend like Phil? We'll never know.
 
She makes 1.2k dollars a month on her part time job right? That's a lot of money if you spend almost all your free time indoors and your only hobby is playing Skyrim and whatever new AAA trash comes out while someone else gives you free room and board and pays for every other expense in the house. Even if you buy 5 new white haht pahpular AAA games that come out in a month that's still only 300 dollars spent, and like I said she doesn't strike me as someone who has the braincells required to put money away for a rainy day.
Correct, somewhere in that ballpark: The initial begruptcy filing reported gross income of $1,349.92 / month or net income of $1,087.23 /month but the statement of monthly income claimed a gross income of $1,742.32 / month without specifying net income. America has a progressive tax system so the change in net income will be slightly smaller than the change in gross income; with that in mind net income would probably have been around $1,400-$1,450 if the higher number is accurate. The begruptcy is like a really good book in that every time you reread it, you find something else new and interesting.

Personally I have two guesses for where her money is going:
First, she really does have debt from her time in Michigan. She was couch surfing for a while before "Subaru Man" and did not even have the money for a crappy apartment if you believe she was squatting, so she probably put necessities on credit cards. If she wasn't working during that period () she probably couldn't even make the minimum payments which would have triggered penalties + hiked interest rates. This goes double when she was not working in 2018 according to the begruptcy.

Second, she has her own gacha problem. Phil has made offhand comments about her playing the Animal Crossing mobile game which is pretty exploitative and you know Phil isn't going to give her access to his accounts.

Edit: I have a third guess - some nights she orders Doordash at her expense to avoid cooking. Remember, a couple years ago Phil claimed they took turns cooking. It's a bit of a stretch but she is still responsible for dinner every other night, Phil might refuse to pay for delivery if it was supposed to be her night to cook.
 

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uh, he has been. the chair spin, blowing bubbles, sour cream on a waffle that he has to rescue her from (I mean really, you intentionally make your wife look THAT stupid to the world?)
What I meant by that was that he'd openly call them bad ideas, since he's at the moment just memory holing them. The day I believe she'd gone is the day that he starts disparaging her ideas. With the whole sour cream thing, I don't think that Phil realised how stupid it made her look, since he never thinks before he does or says anything. He more likely told it think that it made him look good, helping his "loving" wife like that.
 
I'm referring mainly to how he doesn't have any real material to work with, and keeps weaving stories I don't believe. Like all the times she supposedly just stood there and stared at something, or when he talked about her getting shifted from department to department using a childishly exaggerated number like he always does, as well as the nonsensical concealment of her being home. Nobody lies about their spouse working fewer hours, after they just got done making them look bad without realizing it, when their very presence in the Snort Fort is in question. If Kat lived there and had fewer hours, Phil would not think to cover that up in the interest of making her look good. He clearly doesn't operate that way. He would prefer to try taking advantage of that, because speculation of her not being there offends his ego.

It's all bullshit, that Phil does a terrible job of coming up with, because she isn't there and he has no imagination. Or she is, and that's even worse. lol

What I meant by that was that he'd openly call them bad ideas, since he's at the moment just memory holing them. The day I believe she'd gone is the day that he starts disparaging her ideas. With the whole sour cream thing, I don't think that Phil realised how stupid it made her look, since he never thinks before he does or says anything. He more likely told it think that it made him look good, helping his "loving" wife like that.
I've been assuming they're things Phil has done and wants to talk about while protecting his ego. Since Kat almost certainly isn't watching the streams, he just tells it like she's doing so he can be the hero in the story who is definitely not a fucking idiot.

Especially with the bones in the garbage disposal. That's analogous to Phil dumping grease down the toilet. Yeah, you can do it and maybe not hurt anything, but it's really stupid.
 
It's been discussed a billion times but I think it makes no sense to assume Phil made her hide her Internet presence when he simultaneously quite blatantly wanted to monetize her since the beginning.
Possibly to avoid people knowing Kat was cheating on Subaru Jeff. Jeff was one of the few things Phil was aware of when they were streaming.
 
It's a bit of a stretch but she is still responsible for dinner every other night, Phil might refuse to pay for delivery if it was supposed to be her night to cook.
That would be a very Phil move, holding someone else to a higher standard than he'll ever tolerate being held to. Though, it being an in-person situation throws a wrench in the works. Kat may not be scary, but she doesn't need to be, as we know. Phil ran away from Justin Wong, one of the nicest people in the FGC.
Possibly to avoid people knowing Kat was cheating on Subaru Jeff. Jeff was one of the few things Phil was aware of when they were streaming.
Maybe. I understand the thinking, but I would expect it of someone here, not Phil. He's the guy who thinks people on Twitter aren't fully aware of what he does on stream on any given day. You may make the connection between social media posts and an infamous streamer, but he himself seems not to.
 
I've been assuming they're things Phil has done and wants to talk about while protecting his ego. Since Kat almost certainly isn't watching the streams, he just tells it like she's doing so he can be the hero in the story who is definitely not a fucking idiot.

Especially with the bones in the garbage disposal. That's analogous to Phil dumping grease down the toilet. Yeah, you can do it and maybe not hurt anything, but it's really stupid.
I generally lean in this direction too, even if it is funnier to think the Khet stories are true. I think we've even had an on-stream example with Phil "hilariously" describing when he accidentally spilled water on himself. The stories have the same exact vibe, but even he's starting to realize it's dumb, so he swaps himself out with Khet. The sour cream one especially seems like the same level of Phil spilling water, a relatively minor mistake that he thinks is downright hilarious because his life is so boring and empty that counts as an exciting event.

Shifting gears to the Khet isn't living there story, I don't think it makes sense, even for someone like Phil. It's on the same level of "Leanna has been blackmailing Phil to keep silent." Phil is stupid and a huge pushover, but I don't think even he would pay for his wife to live in a separate home. For one, that would be such a dip into his WWE money. He's also not getting anything out of it. The big thing with Khet is he gets to LARP as an adult, if she's not there and he's still pretending, why wouldn't he just pretend *without* wasting money paying for her second life? We'd have also seen some proof of it in the bank leaks. And in the bankruptcy forms at the very least, she was still confirmed working her part time job. If she was blackmailing Phil or whatever, why work? If she wanted extra spending money, lean on Phil more.
 
Shifting gears to the Khet isn't living there story, I don't think it makes sense, even for someone like Phil. It's on the same level of "Leanna has been blackmailing Phil to keep silent." Phil is stupid and a huge pushover, but I don't think even he would pay for his wife to live in a separate home. For one, that would be such a dip into his WWE money. He's also not getting anything out of it. The big thing with Khet is he gets to LARP as an adult, if she's not there and he's still pretending, why wouldn't he just pretend *without* wasting money paying for her second life? We'd have also seen some proof of it in the bank leaks. And in the bankruptcy forms at the very least, she was still confirmed working her part time job. If she was blackmailing Phil or whatever, why work? If she wanted extra spending money, lean on Phil more.
My thinking is that Kat loses any incentive to stay married to the idiot, unless he floats her life without having to actually put up with him. THAT is what he gets out of it, plus living in denial of her being gone for good. Remember, the only way we're going to know for sure, at any point, is if she files for a divorce. She's not about to contradict him on anything, ever, on social media, like Leanna surely would have, if he had tried that shit back then. He actually had the option of lying here, and since when does he decline to take that anywhere else? Especially with such a powerful motive?

But that undeniable exit confirmed by divorce papers doesn't apply to just us. It applies to Phil as well. The dude still acts like he has hair, you expect me to believe he can accept anything less than "Fuck you pigroach, lose my number"? She probably pays regular visits to pick up the cash to pay her rent, that method wouldn't show up anywhere. Would also help explain him falling behind on his taxes just a few years ago, after a very long time being dumb with money.

That said, it's all conjecture, that I engage in only to annoy Mr. Potatohead, because he can't do a damn thing about it. If it gets proven right or wrong one day, I don't care, it's funny either way the ball lands. No more emotion in an outcome than anybody else has, with their speculation of him being a closet homo.
 
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