Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

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Guess Kat's weight.

  • >200 lbs.

    Votes: 22 3.5%

  • 200 lbs.-250 lbs.

    Votes: 125 20.0%

  • 250 lbs.- 300 lbs.

    Votes: 110 17.6%

  • Damn that's a huge bitch.

    Votes: 369 58.9%
  • Total voters
    626
Leanna more or less fit the mould of the typical girlfriend/partner/wife of an online figure/lolcow that gets trolled. They can't help themselves, they fight with trolls, they constantly show their faces in content, sperg out etc. I don't follow too many people online but I know "Mama JF" for example, or Ethan Ralph's girlfriend, these women are spastic attention whores.

Kat doesn't fit that mould very much, if at all. Now obviously I'm not saying she's a genius or is doing 5D chess or whatever, in fact I'd say it's the opposite; Kat is such a normie that, like any normal person would, is avoiding the online sludge that is DSP's presence. Most online figures that get any attention don't have typical personalities. They tend to lean into drama, attention etc. Could it not be that because we contrast Kat's personality with the average online figure, she comes across as a dullard retardo, when in reality she's just a plain jane vanilla normie who didn't take any of the online bait?

Sure, she married Phil, that's obviously a mark against her sanity, but at the same time a lot of boring vanilla women marry Phil-types, and given how boring Phil himself is and how tumultuous Kat's history is, it makes sense to me that she would get with the most unimaginative boring stable homebody of a man in the galaxy. Even the things that were expected of her have seemingly gone to the wayside, like cooking.

Cyber Bowling said:
It sounds like natural reactions to someone she dislikes, and since her only knowledge of Leanna comes from Phil, of course she'll react negatively.
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As someone who has been with jealous people over my life, maybe I'm just showing my bias here, but her facial reactions reeked of jealousy to me. Eyeroll, shook her head, angry face, looked away. That's not a mere coincidence, and considering the entirety of the DSP online vortex calls her ugly and Leanna attractive (especially in contrast to her) it makes a lot of sense why she would be jealous.
 
Imagine being fucking Phil's second choice. Like, she's anyone else's rough rebound, but during the time they were starting to date Phil was still defining himself by his last relationship.

Seriously, imagine being the balding manbaby's fall back. I'd actually probably just join a nunnery or off myself if I were a girl in that situation.
 
I think pig is such a push over that the horse is simple but still savvy enough to see how much of a push over he is. He talked himself up then she saw how much of a spinless coward he is and controls him on a short leash.

She does not need to engage in anything the pig does and get everything she wants. Look at him bitch about "I can't cook" as of late shes even cutting back on the cooking. She can ether get lazy let herself go and pig will hold on to her for dear life still or she can control him and get her back blown out by proper men and take his ass to the cleaners once shes done with him. The latter happens a lot to weak men, even the most retarded potato females do this to spinless men.
 
I also wonder if his parents drilled any of this weird fuddy duddy-ness into his head once he and Kat got married. Safe to assume his parents are relatively conservative, his dad was in politics as a Republican, his mother is a typical homemaker, they raised him Catholic etc.

Nothing to substantiate it but I've always felt like a lot of how DSP views the world and interacts with it is dictated by people he knows IRL, particularly women. "You're a married man now Philip!"
 
Cistern Rumbler said:
I also wonder if his parents drilled any of this weird fuddy duddy-ness into his head once he and Kat got married.
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I dunno, if his parents could really drill anything into his head at this point, maybe the 10-Year Plan wouldn't have been memory-holed.
And if they were concerned about his behavior, I think they'd have a much longer list to work on. I suspect that whatever the origin of Puritan Phil is, it's purely something between him and Kat.
 
A lot of valid points are brought up here. It may indeed be the case that Kat is closer to a normie avoiding the full strength of the vortex than an autistic dim bulb with the personality of a spoon, due to the fact that, yes, it is common for less-than-normal folks to bathe in the drama. Phil is an example, after all, and no doubt Kat understands how that happened. It's not hard, especially when he goes running to tell her about spilling a small amount of water on himself during a stream. Not going to pretend to know what she said there, but based on what Phil says in that clip, it's pretty clear that she wasn't exactly engaging him on his own level. He spoke to her the way a child does to their mother. That wouldn't happen if she too typically acted like a child.

And for all we know, she picked up on him only caring about her presence on stream for monetization purposes. That wouldn't be hard either, especially if she has read this place. We've talked about it plenty.

I don't know that she really was jealous there, or just kind of displeased with something being brought up that didn't jive with what Phil had told her. He did, after all, go straight to calling her "just some girl". It wasn't actually a panicked response, he just forgot what he said years ago, but to Kat, it probably sounded that way. Though it's worthy mentioning that it seems unlikely that Kat would immediately think of Leanna, since "just some girl" is not likely to be how Phil describes his ex-girlfriend off-camera. But it probably got Kat thinking that there was another ex-girlfriend somewhere that Phil never mentioned. It didn't take long for her to catch her husband in a lie of some kind, we can be sure of that, because the pigroach never stops lying. Nor does he ever get good at doing so.
 
Cistern Rumbler said:
As someone who has been with jealous people over my life, maybe I'm just showing my bias here, but her facial reactions reeked of jealousy to me. Eyeroll, shook her head, angry face, looked away. That's not a mere coincidence, and considering the entirety of the DSP online vortex calls her ugly and Leanna attractive (especially in contrast to her) it makes a lot of sense why she would be jealous.
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I definitely think there's a world where Khet is jealous of Leanna. If Khet is smarter than we give her credit for, which I admit may be a stretch, she's at least done some reading on Phil and saw posts speculating that Phil isn't over Leanna. I don't know exactly what was being said in chat either, but I imagine people were echoing that sentiment or called her replacement Leanna or the like. I just don't think that jealousy translates into Phil's weird vow of video game celibacy.
 
Cyber Bowling said:
I definitely think there's a world where Khet is jealous of Leanna. If Khet is smarter than we give her credit for, which I admit may be a stretch, she's at least done some reading on Phil and saw posts speculating that Phil isn't over Leanna. I don't know exactly what was being said in chat either, but I imagine people were echoing that sentiment or called her replacement Leanna or the like. I just don't think that jealousy translates into Phil's weird vow of video game celibacy.
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If I were Kat I'd be jealous too. Leanna is a lot more attractive than her.
 
TheGoutburglar said:
Not going to pretend to know what she said there, but based on what Phil says in that clip, it's pretty clear that she wasn't exactly engaging him on his own level. He spoke to her the way a child does to their mother.
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To me it just sounded like he was clowning around. That's probably just the kind of humor Kat likes, or that he thinks she likes.
 
Cyber Bowling said:
I definitely think there's a world where Khet is jealous of Leanna. If Khet is smarter than we give her credit for, which I admit may be a stretch, she's at least done some reading on Phil and saw posts speculating that Phil isn't over Leanna. I don't know exactly what was being said in chat either, but I imagine people were echoing that sentiment or called her replacement Leanna or the like.
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Regardless of what Kat thinks of it, I'm sure Phil has given away on his own that his failed relationship with his first girlfriend is a sore subject for him. It's not like he has managed to hide that on retrospective streams, after all, where it should be easier.
Cyber Bowling said:
I just don't think that jealousy translates into Phil's weird vow of video game celibacy.
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It's so hard to say because on one hand, Phil is a complete pussy, but on the other hand, he's self-absorbed, and can and will do things solely because he wants to, without thinking about anything else. Or deliberately in contradiction to what he knows others want/suggest.
DiabeticSP said:
Thats how Phil talks to his chat so either he thinks she's also retarded or he just talks like that to everyone.
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Given his pigsplaining during the 341 hearing, I have no doubt that Phil has absolutely no clue how to talk to anyone, and so follows whatever program he thinks will work.
 
I think the difference in age is a big element too. Leanna was more or less a child with very little sway over Phil (she couldn't even get him to bang her regularly). Kat, even as a dimwit, is older, more serious, more mature etc and we all know how pathetic Phil is in the face of adult confrontation.

Not saying she brow-beat him into avoiding vidya chicks, but if we admit it's a possibility she's behind this to some degree, this goes a long way to describing why he was so different with Leanna vs with Kat now.
 
I suppose. Phil did select Leanna for her youth, so he could feel like the grown up, and someone like Kat may, intentionally or no, make him feel more like the kid. He certainly sounded like one in the water squirt audio, after all. And other times he's faced with someone in a position of authority, he gets mousey as hell.

Classic bully trait, too, unsurprisingly. They're a fake alpha so long as they're dealing with lower betas, but as soon as a real Chad enters the room, that goes out the window. You can see this play out in the last stream featuring Leanna. She was done with his shit, and he just sat there acting like he couldn't hear her, fake laughing.

Has me wondering how much hilarity we're missing out on thanks to Kat not punking Phil out on-camera all the time, like she could if she wanted to. Imagine him streaming Super Turbo and she busts into the pigpen to rag on him for clogging the toilet again or something. Imagine that being a regular thing.
 
Cistern Rumbler said:
I also wonder if his parents drilled any of this weird fuddy duddy-ness into his head once he and Kat got married. Safe to assume his parents are relatively conservative, his dad was in politics as a Republican, his mother is a typical homemaker, they raised him Catholic etc.

Nothing to substantiate it but I've always felt like a lot of how DSP views the world and interacts with it is dictated by people he knows IRL, particularly women. "You're a married man now Philip!"
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In one very special episode of Ask the King, Phil goes on to describe his rebellious phase.

His parents were cheating on each other and this led to constant fighting in the house. Phil was really upset because his stupid parents were too busy trying to save their marriage and they weren't paying attention to him!

Anyways, the moral of the story is Phil's parents cheated. Leanna was seeing other dudes while still living in the condo (I'm meeting him at the mall" "You'll be back for dinner though, right?) Kat cheated on Subaruman.

I think Phil acts all prudish towards sex so Kat won't have any excuse to cheat on him.
 
Sparkletor 2.0 said:
Phil was really upset because his stupid parents were too busy trying to save their marriage and they weren't paying attention to him!
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Regardless of anything, if little Phillip was really that self-absorbed, I'm thinking that his upbringing may not have had as much to do with his known behavior as would seem predictable. I'm thinking he was just destined to be like this, no matter what anyone said or did, because dear god has his freakish level of insecurity not faded in the least. And if it goes back that far, that's just plain disturbing. Truly, genuinely disturbing.
 
TheGoutburglar said:
Regardless of anything, if little Phillip was really that self-absorbed, I'm thinking that his upbringing may not have had as much to do with his known behavior as would seem predictable. I'm thinking he was just destined to be like this, no matter what anyone said or did, because dear god has his freakish level of insecurity not faded in the least. And if it goes back that far, that's just plain disturbing. Truly, genuinely disturbing.
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Little Phillip? He was 18.
 
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