Goodwill doesn’t need the money but our boy Kev sure could use a few shekels to top off his Hasbro account. Totally shameless.
He hates charities that have Christian undertones to them. Not a lot of goodwill is there in Kevin. He's the sort of man who would only support his friends, only to stab them in the back if he had something to gain. I get wanting to keep the money, but you should really use it for the benefit of others—whether family or strangers in need. Or you could return it to Goodwill outright, or donate it to them. There's much one can do with the money without being an overt ass, but Kevin enjoys shitting on people and organizations that achieve more than he ever will.
Kevin is a true anarchocommunist, obviously. The anarchocommie doctorine is "keep everything for yourself and never redistribute anything, fuck all charities." Goodwill is a business, but saying fuck them without suggesting who else to give it to really REALLY shows how spoiled and entitled he is. I don't even think he thinks 500$ is a lot considering how he blows through money like toilet paper.
It’s him. He thinks the money should go to him.
"Don't help genuinely disadvantaged people! Give me sheckles for Transformers and sex toys".
This might actually be great for the monastery. Whichever poor brother draws the short straw can come back with tales of how Sodom has corrupted the outside world, and everyone forced to live in contact with Kevin at the mission can become closer to the Lord through intense suffering. For extra fun, give the Benedictine control of Kevin's Twitter account and see if he can introduce Jesus into the lives of any of Kevin's 15k degenerate Twitter followers.
Some years ago, a story made the rounds in the Progressive social media sphere that certain Goodwill managers had been caught abusing and underpaying their more "special needs" employees. The Progressives have never forgiven them.Kevin hates charity.
I would pay good money to see a Benedictine witness to the Sodomite hordes that is Kevin's Twitter followers. Some of them are so water-brained they'd abandon their long-held faggotry just because a Twitter account with big numbers is telling them to.
Thank god, I thought you said nunnery. Kevin would stamp and scream and cry and demand a lawyer as
Or he goes full St. Francis of Assisi and befriends the alpacas, treating them better than the troons. When they attempt to execute him for communicating with the elusive Earl, the alpacas rise up to defend the man and spirit him back to his monastery, where they find Kev's ashes. He burst into flame immediately upon setting foot on holy ground.
Monks can tend gardens, handle livestock, make wine, illuminate manuscripts, and like, a million other things. Kevin would be out like last week's burrito night scraps if a monk ever managed to tolerate the heathen commune for more than an hour.
Nah, it’d be diaperfurs for Jesus
