Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[The Southwest Strangla]

Do you guys think Cobra has ever ordered something, then forgotten about it and screamed at the delivery driver when they arrived?

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he has severe alcoholism which can lead to memory lapse, so, yeah, most likely. I mean he never forgave papa john's over the missing garlic butters.

 

[Molly Millions]

Thats true, he drinks so much that he probably forgets about his actual orders and just assumes they're all troll deliveries.

Hear a knock? START SCREAMING

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Thats true, he drinks so much that he probably forgets about his actual orders and just assumes they're all troll deliveries.

Hear a knock? START SCREAMING

He's blacked out enough to where that's probably happened off stream. His neighbors got a front row seat that I'm jealous of. Exclusive access to life of Casper's biggest celebrity and they had no idea.

 

[Star Spangled Bogger]

Sure I don't see anything wrong with that, you'll have to find an archivist or two to dedicate some time to it or it'll be a waste but yeah doable, send Null an email laying out what you like concisely and see what happens.

I think you're right on this. I am probably too optimistic that it will suddenly fill up with content.

It helps me cope with KFC taking away the Double down.

I honestly have no idea how Cobes hasn't figured out if you order two burgers from KFC you can make your own double down food hack. I thought he was the king of food hacks!

 

[Shinkai]

Thats true, he drinks so much that he probably forgets about his actual orders and just assumes they're all troll deliveries.

Hear a knock? START SCREAMING

I'm not fucking answering that I'm streaming
*Knocks once more*
*Gives up on not answering and toddler trots to the door* CAN I HELP YOU? I DIDNT ORDER THAT"
Man he's rude about it but I'm NGL when I lived in my first flat and the doors were labeled so bad I often got people for next door ringing my bell and I eventually did wound up about it so i can relate somewhat. But yknow doesn't take much to be polite about it

 

[Simp Biscuit]

Oh my god how many times do we have to go over why Josh can't work a job? I swear this has to be like the 20th time. He's a retard and he's lazy. He's also a drunk who reeks of shit and has brain damage. No one wants him to work for them.

Are there any Casper Goodwill bell towers our boy can work at part time?

 

[Drive-By Comment]

Do you guys think Cobra has ever ordered something, then forgotten about it and screamed at the delivery driver when they arrived?

That shit probably happens to him, if not quite often, at least every now and then. But he does not really scream at drivers, just tells them his trolls are assholes.
He just might lumber drunk to his streaming chair to bitch about it to his troll also with out realizing he is not actually streaming. Might get angry at the laptop that has shut itself down to fuck with him.

Casper Goodwill bell towers our boy can work at

Yes, but it has already been pre-emptively contacted 50 times to make sure they will not hire him.
He really is unemployable and not just because has become too lazy to do it. That is one thing Josh is not making up, trolls will fuck that up for him where ever he would work.

 

[whogoesthere]

Yeah I think the job era is over for Cobes. Trolls would fuck enough with him that most places are going to pick a far easier hire.

I think Clint dying will be far worse than him ever needing a job. I know when Clint had a really nasty car crash, Cobes was annoyed at his dad and has wished his death many times. But without Clint, I think Cobes would be fucked.

 

[DennisReynolds]

Yeah I think the job era is over for Cobes. Trolls would fuck enough with him that most places are going to pick a far easier hire.

I think Clint dying will be far worse than him ever needing a job. I know when Clint had a really nasty car crash, Cobes was annoyed at his dad and has wished his death many times. But without Clint, I think Cobes would be fucked.

It is, you could argue he could hold a cart wrangling job that even downies can do, but it wouldn't be long til he decides living in a tent begging for hooch is much easier and more satisfying . I'd rather my share of tax pennies go to him living in a boglim hovel churning out content than Casper having to watch him shit on the sidewalk every morning.

 

[Bogliacci]

So Jessica "Exposes" Aaron 3 months later, does the classic lolcow tactic of saying that she knows something really bad about him but that she won't reveal it yet, meanwhile she says a bunch of "bad" stuff he did, because she doesn't actually have much shit to fling, if it's even real. Straight up just a bpd bitch trying to isolate Josh and force him to pay attention to her imo

 

[Shinkai]

So Jessica "Exposes" Aaron 3 months later, does the classic lolcow tactic of saying that she knows something really bad about him but that she won't reveal it yet, meanwhile she says a bunch of "bad" stuff he did, because she doesn't actually have much shit to fling, if it's even real. Straight up just a bpd bitch trying to isolate Josh and force him to pay attention to her imo

Never thought I'd hate someone this much. She needs to take a permanent stay in the bathtub

 

[中华人民共和国的政治]

So Jessica "Exposes" Aaron 3 months later, does the classic lolcow tactic of saying that she knows something really bad about him but that she won't reveal it yet, meanwhile she says a bunch of "bad" stuff he did, because she doesn't actually have much shit to fling, if it's even real. Straight up just a bpd bitch trying to isolate Josh and force him to pay attention to her imo

Whoever pays for the next bog witch visit should be forced to chaperone and stay in clocktower trailer with them

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

I think you're right on this. I am probably too optimistic that it will suddenly fill up with content.

I honestly have no idea how Cobes hasn't figured out if you order two burgers from KFC you can make your own double down food hack. I thought he was the king of food hacks!

I'd say that would require too much effort but he's actually ordered fast food and customized it after delivery in the past.

 

[Umaibae]

Those “putting the phone on mute” comments in the latest video responce are a bit too on the nose, toobz.

He’s also never going to see the Sea Hag again, mark my words. He’s so over her.

 

[IsaacShraeder]

He’s also never going to see the Sea Hag again, mark my words. He’s so over her.

Yeah the new gender relayshuns rant confirmed this imo. He's done with the bog witch, but of course the troles can NEVER EVER be allowed learn this so she'll just get the Puff treatment: Don't worry toobz Jessica is just burrowed for the winter we're still together

 

[BallBuster II]

Those “putting the phone on mute” comments in the latest video responce are a bit too on the nose, toobz.

He’s also never going to see the Sea Hag again, mark my words. He’s so over her.

Was she a blessing disguise for him?

Think about it. We got some insane content, his plight garnered quite a bit of sympathy from people, and he scored an upgraded living situation.

His 2+ weeks of misery between both her visits might have been worth the payoff. He’s rocking better living conditions than most of the Reddit fags who torment him. Has a dedicated smoking room. A clean kitchen and bedroom (for now anyway). And he seems to have come away from without even an ounce of crotch rot.

Sorry, but this whole NAL saga at this point, I’m marking it as a major Win for our boy.

 

[Pascal's Wagie]

And he seems to have come away from without even an ounce of crotch rot.

None that he's willing to drunkenly overshare, anyway.

 

[Drive-By Comment]

Yeah I think the job era is over for Cobes. Trolls would fuck enough with him that most places are going to pick a far easier hire.

I think Clint dying will be far worse than him ever needing a job. I know when Clint had a really nasty car crash, Cobes was annoyed at his dad and has wished his death many times. But without Clint, I think Cobes would be fucked.

It was a bit feels inducing that he could not drop his gothic bad boy façade in moment like that, because he knows he is dependent on his dad. Had to keep act up.

 

[Umaibae]

 

[Drive-By Comment]

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Pretty good, but only reason I listened the whole thing was to see if, I'm straight not gay, punchline was going to come.

*This negroid music reminds me. That is one thing I think Cobes is actually quite good at. Dropping some rhymes.
His one in a billion golden ticket to bell tower mansion, is some rap producer with interest in lolcow entertainment, one day diving into this rabbit hole.
Oh that would be some side character on what ever Lil Pimp's music video.