Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Blue Miaplacidus]

Got a notification on my phone that Cobes has joined Telegram. No way to know why he joined but this doesn't feel like a good sign to me

1.) porn (50% chance)
2.) scam (35% chance)
3.) buddy troll manipulation (15% chance)

It’s been confirmed to be fake.

Where? I don't use telegram but I thought you only get that notification when someone in your contacts signs up with their phone number.

 

[3deadniggers]

Any one got a super cut of Cobra shitting on NAL with Porkney?

 

[Molly Millions]

Shoutout to Cousin Matt

 

[Zashaiba]

Cobes is going to end up see-sawing between pro-Ukraine and pro-Russia telegram channels. One week he's a bonafide Zigger with Z-shaped snake merch, the next he's switching everything to look like sig runes.

Telegram was a mistake for me. Because of this damned war I am addicted to these horrible channels. It’s like porn, news porn. I pray that skygod never lets Cobes in on their existence, or he might start posting in the Happenings threads.

 

[grand larsony]

It’s been confirmed to be fake.

The account is registered to his phone number. Don't you have to do SMS confirmation to register with a phone number? Hopefully you're right though Telegram really isn't the place for Cobes

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

Any one got a super cut of Cobra shitting on NAL with Porkney?

 

[Shinkai]

1.) porn (50% chance)
2.) scam (35% chance)
3.) buddy troll manipulation (15% chance)

Where? I don't use telegram but I thought you only get that notification when someone in your contacts signs up with their phone number.

100% for pillie dealer

 

[bonified retard]

100% for pillie dealer

Angie telling him to hit her up via telegram, but she really meant morse code because she's 100 years old?

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

100% for pillie dealer

Why would a drug dealer who sells pills in Casper Wyoming ask Josh to install and sign up for telegram? Josh huffs airhorn and duster and consumes whatever drugs paypigs mail to him, but I don't see him buying pills unless I've missed a major development. It's far more likely he followed a link from xvideos for a telegram porn group or fell for a youtube comment scam from one of his favourite youtubers. (Hey @KingCobraJFS it's me @TotallyRealZoomerAlcoholReviewer you won my giveaway of 1000 bottles of boner pills, message me on telegram for your prize, do not redeem sar) Josh is an extremely gullible retard.

 

[RandyMiskatonic]

The BOY's going to get scammed into buying a trump coin or one of those crypto games. Terrorgram is not for the moldable mind.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

The final straw was a while ago , that Halloween stream at the bar when the Trollz called in and got him kicked out. Our boys favorite holiday and he was so pumped only to be thrown to the streets like a god damn peasant. This is a sick sick world. Since then he has made ZERO effort to show us any peek into his day to day. All the cow touching killed the content. I cant blame the guy honestly.

Fuck these trolls dude.


Glory days throw back to comfy check in's from the bar in the middle of the week mid-day.

Ugh I remember that Halloween. It had its moments, sure, like when he pulled out the cap gun at the bar but after the troles got him kicked out, he went dark for a few hours. We'll never know how he managed to cut his hand that night.

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

We'll never know how he managed to cut his hand that night.

The super hot dark haired smoker girl that gave him a ride home had a clit piercing and he caught his hand on it. (he punched a wall in tardrage)

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Low volume food review time. You'll have to max out your volume to hear the dank ingredients he put on it.

 

[Slim Boglim]

Low volume food review time. You'll have to max out your volume to hear the dank ingredients he put on it.

“Pramajohn Romero” this pizza’s about to make me it’s bitch?

“And the ‘whole’ being it’s covering the whole pizza kind of thing” Thanks for clarifying cobies, I’d thought they’d just started dumping Philly steak and onions in a hole

 

[Molly Millions]

Imagine John Romero doing his hourly self googling and finding this video

What will he think? Will Cobra be featured in Doom 4?

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

The super hot dark haired smoker girl that gave him a ride home had a clit piercing and he caught his hand on it. (he punched a wall in tardrage)

Jessica would unironically believe a story like this.

 

[Norwegian Trailer Trash]

Jessica would unironically believe a story like this.

It'd start a countdown to when she'd get hers pierced and another countdown to when it falls off from infection.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

It'd start a countdown to when she'd get hers pierced and another countdown to when it falls off from infection.

The un-un-clit?

 

[Nana Feeder 9k]

Imagine John Romero doing his hourly self googling and finding this video

What will he think? Will Cobra be featured in Doom 4?

In an ideal world he's the final boss.

 

[UncommonParlence]

Jessica would unironically believe a story like this.

I'm team "pawn aNAL off on CoolTaste".

If only someone was to start a crowd fund to doordash her to his front door.

He'd be slow on the uptake seeing as he's blind and she's liable to be deeply entrenched before he realizes what's been done to him.

All it would take is some buddy trolls in his ear convincing him how much it would piss Cobra off and how easy it is to bacon her nator.

This would truly be the most graceful eloquent and beautifully poetic timeline.

I, for one, will continue to hope my little heart out for this thinnest of fate's strands.

I ship CruelTaste, I digress, and Jessica.