Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

Here's Kobes' 4 hour stream from the weekend:



Start:
A rage bait Terrence Pop video pissed him off. He's describing the article in the video. Makes a drink combination with the shooters he received.
2:00:
Today's kids have it easy because you would get bullied in school for cross dressing when Kobes was in school. Boys shouldn't be allowed to wear mini skirts because it's easier for them to rape?
4:03:
Tranny bathroom sperging. Shout out to Jonathan Yaniv. Talks about his food challenge and shills his PayPal.
5:50:
Moar alcohol. Kobes hates rape I all forms. Tranny bathroom sperging. Scenario with imagination wife and daughter.
8:30:
Delta 8 vape action. Talks about the article from the video.
9:40:
Trannys ruining it for the non rapist trannys. Was working on his album. Trannys are stunning and brave. Kobes wears eyeliner and paints his nails but that's as far as it goes.
12:16:
Kobes loves his new fuck rape shirt. Shills his PO box.
13:06:
Shills the Mrs Green staff. Get a free custom wand. Back to talking about the article.
14:14:
Can't remember if he ever sang the John legend song yesterday. Talks about the OF granny.
16:00:
Kobes parenting Scenario with some gender relations.
18:20:
Talking about women withholding sex as a bargaining chip. Fuck rape in all forms. Talking about wearing his shorts over his jeans. Talks about his food challenge.
20:47:
Free wand and autographed shirt with the staff. Talks about Mrs Green.
24:50:
Glasses on. Autistic Ozzy TWU.
24:57:
Puts on a comedy video for 2 seconds and then does his own stand up routine about gas prices.
32:30:
Imagination breast enhancement pill.
34:49:
Gender relations. He's digging his Jafar beard.
36:05:
Puts on a Terrence Pop video for 2 seconds. Says he's gotten better at guitar. Back to the video for 2 seconds.
38:20:
Guitar shredding.
45:06:
Behind his head guitar shredding TWU
51:38:
Back to the video for 2 seconds. Dry spell cope. Talks about trying to control his temper and how good he can play guitar. Shows off his spellcaster .
56:21:
Back to the video for 2 seconds. Delta 8. SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE. Coof coof. Back to the video.
59:01:
Bragging about how long he's been on YouTube. Woke cry babies. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Race relations.
1:14:10:
Back to the video. Gender relations.
1:18:45:
Guitar. Race relations.
1:20:45:
Checking himself out with his new glasses on. Back to the video. Gender relations. Body shaaaaaming. Talks about Eugenia Cooney and Nicocado avocado. Lol he's talking about Nicocado being a gross eater. Critical race theory and gender relations.
1:28:36:
Kobes would trade a life time of sex to end Shar'ia law because that's how much he respects women. Bitching about western women and Feminazis.
1:33:00:
Talking about ISIS and the Taliban. Back to the video.
1:35:20:
Complaining about women and advertising. Fabio ad Scenario. Free balling. Gender relations and advertising. IPhones and consoomerism.
1:42:00:
Back to the video. Kobes regrets picking his nose as a kid. Back to the video.
1:46:19:
Change glasses. Back to the video.
1:48:52:
Shows off his Rick and morty flask. Shills his customised girl store.
1:52:00:
Vaping won't cause damage. Coughing fit. Back to the video.
1:55:42:
Talks about his flask. Back to the video. This is ridiculous YouTube. Race relations. Vaping and coughing. Back to the video for 2 seconds and more race relations. Back to the video.
2:07:10:
Elmo impression. Race relations. Smelling his flask In silence. Back to the video.
2:12:10:
Immigration. Back to the video. Fuck mass shootings. Back to the video.
2:19:56:
Wage gap, divorce court. Gender relations. Talks about his flask. Gender relations Back to the video. Unexpected sneeze. He's mumbling over the video about gender relations.
2:33:00:
Gender relations. Rip Chester Bennington. Fuck sickos. Rocking out yo imagination music? Back to the video.
2:37:07:
Kobes pick up lines. Back to the video.
2:39:04:
Gender relations. Not an alcoholic. Talks about his sneaky snake floats. Cobra's café. Back to the video.
2:47:50:
Checks his PayPal. $9.47. Instant transfer. Shills Exhumed visions store. Shows Courtney's cat on her female empowerment shirt. Back to the video.
2:51:20:
Talks about rattlesnakes. Shills his customised girl store. It's gender inclusive. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Dry spell cope. Back to the video.
2:55:10:
Thanks the fans who sent him smokes and cigars. Talks about cigarettes. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Just say nope. Know what I'm saying YouTube. Back to the video.
2:58:42:
Guns and pitbulls. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Gun sperg. Back to the video.
3:05:55:
Drugs and alcohol psa. Back to the video.
3:08:30:
Taking break from the Terrence Pop video. Looks up his chicken Alfredo video. Finds an edit and rants about people stealing his content. Shout out to Lenin lime.
3:11:40:
Hes doing response to Lenin lime's edit of his chicken Alfredo video. He's very proud if this recipe. He subscribed to Lenin lime and shares the video link.
3:15:15:
He seems happy enough that Lenin lime is preserving his content for future generations. He's watching the video and explaining his recipe.
3:20:00:
Talks about his stuffed meatballs recipe. Back to watching his cooking video and explaining his recipe.
3:34:50:
Owning the trolls with his chicken Alfredo. Back to the video.
3:38:55
Says Lenin lime stole his video for clout but it was a good edit dood. Fuck racism, fuck sexism. Smoke break.
3:43:50:
Returns. Moar alcohol. Talks about his sneaky snake floats. Back to the Terrence Pop video.
3:52:53:
Kobes gets judged fir being Autistic, he wouldn't judge someone fir being fat. Shills his customised girl store. Back to the video.
3:54:54:
Weaponizing sex and gender relations. Back to the video. Gun sperg. Back to the video.
4:00:00:
Change glasses. Back to the video. Society is fucked. Falling asleep. Back to the video.
4:07:35:
2 sets of glasses on.
4:06:36:
Smoke trick, coof. Mumbling about how he would cook chicken Alfredo for spooky girl.
4:13:26:
Puts on warlord's videos. Says he hopes warlord us okay and now he needs a smoke. Fuck suicide. Smoke break.
4:19:40:
Returns. Mumbling about Warlord and how people tell Kobe's that his videos help them. Moar alcohol. Talks about clocktower of terror.
Kobes wearing a t-shirt with a picture of him on it reacting to his own video TMDWU! The people in his chat putting blame on him if Warlord was stupid enough to kill himself should kill themselves. Warlord is not Kobes' responsibility just like it's not Warlord's responsibility to stop Kobes from drinking himself to death.

New Walnut Grove:
 
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chimpSculpture_ said:
The only reason he was fired was because of trolls.
Click to expand...
He was constantly late or sometimes didn't even show up to his shift, he would confuse the sweet and unsweet teas, talked shit about the manager during a livestream, and even showed up to his shift with black dye all over his face.

But yeah it checks out, it was definitely the trolls
 
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Here's Kobes streams from yesterday and the day before:
Start:
Going to do vocal covers. He talked to Warlord and he didn't kill himself. Going to have some sneaky snake floats. He's glad warlord didn't kill himself.
1:44:
Not answering his phone. No offence. Making a sneaky snake float and saving some for later to share with Warlord. Says warlord is doing better.
5:20:
Talking about being there for warlord in his time of need. Can't control life. Have to look out for your peeps.
8:00:
Says warlord is safe. Kobes called him and he calmed down. Talks about his drink.
9:51:
Puts on Richie's stream.
11:20:
Talks about his float. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Says Courtney was blowing up his phone when he was playing GTAV about Warlord. (He watched the videos on stream and just went ahead and played GTAV lol what a dick)
15:30:
Talking about anger. Talks about his drink.
17:30:
Saving a float for warlord. Talking about helping his friends when they're depressed. Talks about a YouTube video he watched that freaked him out. Played clocktower of terror.
19:46:
Puts Richie's live back on for 2 seconds. Bill Barr the famous comedian.
22:40:
Back to the stream. Drinking from his flask now.
26:00:
Messing with his pooter. Back to the stream.
Start:
Having another sneaky snake float and bitching about Western women.
3:20:
Puts on a rage bait video someone sent him. Feminism sperg. Gender relations. Back to the video
12:37:
Single parents should date other Single parents. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Talking about asking your baby permission to change its diaper. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Victimhood society. Back to the video.
17:30:
Bullying and cyber bullying. Back to the video. Toxic masculinity and feminine men. Back to the video.
21:44:
Kobes ideal man is 6ft tall, 6 inch dich and 6 figure salary Back to the video. Society online dating. Social media is tahxic. Back to the video.
26:15:
Legalise pot sperg. Back to the video.
38:04:
Shaking out his hair. Watches the end of the video and ends the stream.
Start:
Straight into explaining how to make his cheesy chip chicken fried steak. Gives warlord the camera and puts ruffles into a bowl.
1:59:
Crushes up the ruffles.
3:30:
Doritos in bowl. Crushes the doritos.
6:10:
Flour and seasoning into his crushed chips and doritos.
8:04:
Dips the steaks into milk, egg, the flour and chips and then into the pan. Why did he use so much milk?
12:26:
Flips his steaks. Cleans up.
14:37:
Flips the steaks again.
15:06:
Going to top the steak with bacon and cheese.
16:05:
One steak is done. Puts bacon on it.
17:20:
Takes out the other steak. Puts all the milk into the pan and all the flour and chips mix into the pan. Stirring the gravy. Needs country crock but he's out so he adds more milk and flour.
20:26:
Bacon on other steak. Stirring his gravy.
23:25:
Shills Exhumed Visions store.
25:20:
Cheese on steaks.
26:27:
His gravy has congealed into a solid lump
27:27:
Steaks in microwave.
39:25:
Cuts up some gravy and puts in on the steak.
31:00:
Loads up the dishwasher and wipes down his counters and oven with a bath towel.
33:22:
Yukbang. Then ends the stream because his battery was going to die.

New Lenin Lime edit:
 
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CerealKilla420 said:
Why do so many lolcows go troon mode?

Glad someone came to say this. I know that a lot of people like to hate on Josh for being on Adderall when he was younger but honestly if he had just taken his medication and stopped drinking at a younger age he would be a completely functional person (albeit a little bit dumb).

The sad thing with people like Cobra is that they typically never keep up with their medication and instead choose to self medicate and turn themselves into a Boglim. Many such cases I'm afraid...

I know that Josh got fired from Wendy's but honestly those kind of fast food jobs turn people over really quick. I think he can for sure hold a job down he just needs someone a little less high stress than fast food. I know fast food doesn't seem like the kind of job that would be "high stress" but it actually really is. If Josh got a job at a warehouse or something he would be fine I think but then again who knows...
Click to expand...

Something like a cart wrangler maybe, or greeter.
 
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He's taking a shower on stream to shill tactical soap again.

He's done this a few times before
This time it's just recording his empty chair with him yelling in the background though. Currently he is freestyling. He has 380 400+viewers which I think is higher than normal, and slow mode is off. Seems like a successful stream
 
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Ellesse_warrior said:
Bond should just hire him, no one shills that shit as hard as Kobes does
Click to expand...
I wonder how long it would take him to blow an actual endorsement deal with for example the tactical soap. This guy is advertising poison considering his tendency to do and say things that a sponsor would find objectionable. A part of me would love to see it just to see how long it lasts before he shows his dick or a stream of him shitting...the possibilities are so tantalizing lol
 
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Dark Lord is live, responding to tiresome incel shit. Still wearing the same shirt after vile cooking video. Lowered the price on the Mantis Staff. Already making excuses about why it is too cold to collect wand wood.

Pretty sure someone predicted he would use that excuse. Please claim credit.
 
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G.Rapefruit said:
I wonder how long it would take him to blow an actual endorsement deal with for example the tactical soap. This guy is advertising poison considering his tendency to do and say things that a sponsor would find objectionable. A part of me would love to see it just to see how long it lasts before he shows his dick or a stream of him shitting...the possibilities are so tantalizing lol
Click to expand...
I know People would just buy it for the meme. Fuck it give Josh a deal.
 
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Who would have thought his 420th sale would be the glowing mantis staff. So mote it be.

Screen Shot 2021-10-19 at 8.40.51 PM.png
 
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I'm not sure the Dark Lord would be a good endorsement for pheromone soap, or any product that's supposed to give you an edge with the ladies. The only way it would work is if Tactical Soap paid for Cobes to go to a shoot where he's surrounded by women. They could argue if it works for this guy
 
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