Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Potion_Time]

New chicken tendies review toobs.

People will laugh at Cobes for paying 25 dollars for gas station food, but back when I smoked I used to see people ahead of me in line buy shit like this all the time and then swipe their food stamp card for slurpee to go with it.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

People will laugh at Cobes for paying 25 dollars for gas station food, but back when I smoked I used to see people ahead of me in line buy shit like this all the time and then swipe their food stamp card for slurpee to go with it.

That's a step up from gas station food though. It's from his local supermarket's deli, which can be hit or miss depending on the location. I used to FW Albertson's all the time back when I lived close to that store.

 

[Bixby Snyder]

Little off topic but his fry cooking video always makes me laugh so fucking hard. That sound of the first few fries just vanishing into the nether of that black boiling oil.

Any predictions on next arc?

 

[The Bogwater Rises]

I like how he actually looks like a cartoon parody of himself. It fits his bad boy gothing demon cowboy from hell attitude, in that he's just a living cartoon character.

 

[Lei Wulong's Left Leg]

Little off topic but his fry cooking video always makes me laugh so fucking hard. That sound of the first few fries just vanishing into the nether of that black boiling oil.

Any predictions on next arc?

Given how close Josh got to losing his channel, I presume the subreddit fags will try some new strategy to fuck with him(To limited/no success). Short of him finding a new woman to lust over(always possible) I sincerely doubt anything besides getting more inebriated and fatter will happen. Much as I hate to admit it, the milk's running dry on this one.

 

[Jobama]

Mike Stoklasa used a classic cobraism recently.

 

[GothicKingFatass]

Pretty sure the Dropping Fuckin Dead arc is inbound tbh.

 

[Epikusername4]

Mike Stoklasa used a classic cobraism recently.
View attachment 7437075

he was dethawed to perfection toobz

 

[stathom21]

Little off topic but his fry cooking video always makes me laugh so fucking hard. That sound of the first few fries just vanishing into the nether of that black boiling oil.

Any predictions on next arc?

The next is torch arc. How is he allowed to own that?
He will drop it and cause a fire.

 

[anliteralidiot]

Mike Stoklasa used a classic cobraism recently.
View attachment 7437075

wait, I've used dethawed my whole life....

 

[cobra fucker]

wait, I've used dethawed my whole life....

I'm so sorry. What would you like to title your thread?

 

[Eventide]

Pretty sure the Dropping Fuckin Dead arc is inbound tbh.

No, not our Sexy Goth King

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

wait, I've used dethawed my whole life....

It is a nonstandard incorrect word which has been used informally in some places in the west. It is not a real word though. Dethaw would literally mean to freeze. It is confusion/mash-up of thawing, and defrosting.

 

[Jobama]

wait, I've used dethawed my whole life....

I remember on a Seizure stream once someone said something similar. I kind of wonder if dethaw is similar to irregardless in that it’s an incorrect word that’s just become widely used.

 

[cugel]

I always thought he left the food over night as it was too hot for him to eat cos of his teeth.
But the last sandwhich one he said he went to sleep afterwards, is he just making food, ordering it, making a video and passing out before he can eat it?

 

[Pattern Noticer]

So NAL’s mod Sally betrayed her and she told HRH (YouTuber that covers NAL) that Jessica cheated on Cobes twice and told Sally all about it.

The details were spared but she had some guy come over to eat her out. Which is somehow even more disgusting because Cobra’s mouth has been on that rotten baconator.

HRH has a video premiering where she will talk about this, if you can stomach the details.

Even chance she's lying about that to spite cobes.

Classic Cobra is one of my favourite lolcows and if I could meet that starry-eyed kid, I would buy him a beer. The Trapped documentary is an honest look into what the boy used to be.

Trapped doc also gives a nice glimpse into what Casper is like. The teens rapping in the mall, the ex-military guy, the food services guy joking with cobra about necrophilia, the guy drinking mt. dew and cheap vodka.
Beach cruiser is a favorite moment of mine:

 

[Ambient Occlusion]

With the current state of Cobes' hair loss, what would be a good hairstyle for him? His "lollipop dropped on the floor of a barbershop" look is downright horrifying, but how could he make the most of what hair he has left? Cut it short and sport the George Costanza? Shave it all and look like Papa Clint?

I just can't picture him without the luscious gothic locks, so I'm having trouble envisioning any alternatives.

I want him to fully embrace the Gothic wizard look and dress like Skip Konte from Three Dog Night. Keep growing the beard and hair out and wear whatever the fuck this getup is:

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Even chance she's lying about that to spite cobes.

NAL told this to one of her mods awhile ago and it was the mod herself that leaked it.

 

[Big Nasty]

Trapped doc also gives a nice glimpse into what Casper is like.

The scene where the trucks are rushing by on the freeway is atmospheric.

The teens rapping in the mall,

One of the teens is Talon, who later went to prison for killing his own kid while high on meth.

 

[Detective Carey]

View attachment 7436915

My favorite factoid about LaVey is his whole "liking blue cheese means you're queer or a woman because it smells and tastes like balls" quote.

The whole thing is written in smarmy pseudointellectual prose that makes it seem like he was attempting to come off as some kind of ultra deep master at reading people, but it really just makes him sound super fruity like he's talking from experience and lying by omission. It's almost like some kind of prototype 4chan "is this real or bait" shitpost from ancient times.

Speaking of stuff that is super fruity, I saw some Busch Light Apple and thought of the Boglim's love affair with Busch Light Peach, and decided to give it a try. I don't know how anyone drinks more than one of these, it's fucking sugary trash and I can't even detect that it's supposedly a beer (more like a hard cider), and I imagine the peach version wasn't any better in that regards.

I can't even imagine trying to plow through a case of this shit like we've seen him do before. I'm just not goth enough, I admit it.