Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.


Kobes also posted two night videos:
Start:
Guitar shredding
2:44:
Drink combo. Blue raspberry vodka mixed with blue energy drink. Fan bought him the vodka.
4:26:
It's interesting being kobes. Kobes gets recognised by of age ladies around town all the time. He went to the bar the other day and everyone said he smelled good because of tactical soap. Shills Teespring.
7:10:
Rain body fuel #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement lots of caffeine in his drink combination. For 21 and up only.
8:25:
Double standards you can advertise alcohol on YouTube but not cigarettes. Another band has an album with the same name he wanted to call his album.
9:00:
Talking about wanting a pet raven. Shills anti rape shirt.
10:55:
YouTube doesn't care if kobes gets bullied on YouTube. Kobes loves his anti rape shirt.
12:06:
Cobras café.
13:09:
Talks about his meatballs. Food is art.
13:51:
When kobes wins the lottery and builds his dream house...
14:39:
There's a cobragram on the back of his anti rape shirt because the cobra cult does not put up with rape. Makes another drink for all the mothers on mothers day.
16:17:
Shills female empowerment shirt for mother's day gift. Explains his drink combination again. Holding his drink in his mouth to sample it. #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement drink combo is weird.
18:10:
Smoking outside now.
19:00:
Has 2 songs in his head for his new album.
20:05
Saw 3 ravens earlier. Wants a pet raven. Album cover had a raven on it.
22:50:
Lesson learned from getting kicked out of his old apartment
24:30:
Trying to lose weight before recording a shirtless video for his Patreon. Kobes has high body standards. KingSoapraJFS
31:00:
Talking about ozzy concert. Screech.
34:45:
Religion
36:28:
Has to age restrict because he's drinking alcohol in the video. Kids today eat too much caffeine.
39:25:
Gender relations
40:30:
Buy your mom a nice gift for mother's day. Talks shit about his bio mom
43:00:
Got his stepmother a nice mothers day gift
44:30:
Dracula and gender relations
50:00:
Alcohol
 
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Someone bought this retards $300 wand.

wand.PNG
 
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GeneticMtDew said:
The autographed blue and gold wnd with autographed bandana has been sold. I'd imagine one of the "helpers" in Courtney's discord bought it, but who really knows. I'm surprised more info hasn't been leaked from there.
Click to expand...
I was looking at the subreddit a little bit today and apparently, the guy who bought the green cockholster made a post there a little while back and he was promptly ridiculed off the page. People have been buying out Cobra's Etsy listings almost as soon as they're put up for way longer than that Discord has been around, so I don't think we can say for sure if the retard Discord is responsible for any of these big purchases.
 
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Latest videos:
The lucky owner of this new wand will also receive some tactical soap, a certificate of authenticity and a signed bandana.
Thomas Highway said:
Look trolls, stop telling me to get a job.

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Revo said:
View attachment 2165847
Click to expand...

Here's the timestamps for this one. I have a lot of sympathy for Kobes having his chances of getting another regular job ruined by weans. If he had kept working n fast food he at least would have had a chance to upskill and maybe eventually become supervisor or assistant to the regional manager or something.
Start:
Thanks for the fab who bought the super expensive wand. Kobes job is professional wand maker. Kobes explains competitive marketing.
1:30:
Doing a video response to invader vi ? Stops after 2 seconds to say he's not e begging because he says #youdon'thavetodonatebutdonationsaregreatlyappreciated
4:19:
This video is the reason e begging became a thing. He keeps starting and stopping every fucking second!
6:00:
Kobes is a successful wand salesman. 1 second of video. Kobes being creepy about women on the Internet.
8:19:
Kobes is just drinking water and telling it like it is. Back to the video for 1 second and stops to explain YouTube is free and he is not an e begger because he's a successful wand salesman.
10:23:
Kobes is a successful wand salesman.
11:38:
Trolls are the reason Kobes can't have a regular job.
14:40:
Kobes just telling it like it is
16:32:
Reads what's written on the screen
21:58:
Shout out to the chat jannies
25:43:
Gives advice on how to deal with trolls. May make cheaper wands for his next batch. Back to giving advice on dealing with trolls.
33:48:
Kobes lists off all his hustles
35:50:
Going to go outside and have a cigarette after this. Very pleased he sold his very expensive wand. Couldn't complete his taco Bell food challenge. So triggered he needs more water.
39:30
People are offended by Kobes' existence
39:56:
Whispers fuck rape
40:50:
Talks about his gta5 game
Start:
At taco Bell #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement . Explains why he loves chalupas.
1:41:
Sauces . No copyright infringement intended.
2:54:
Yukbang
3:38:
Goes off to get napkins
4:09:
Returns. Trying to eat 12 of these chalupas in one sitting.
5:20:
Shills wand. KingSoapraJFS
6:36:
Yukbang. No copyright infringement intended
9:07:
Yukbang
10:47:
Shows how many chalupas he has left. Says he used to work in fast food and knows what it's like so he will leave his table clean before he goes.
12:44:
Yukbang. 9 left.
13:47:
Yukbang. No sauces this time. He's sweating from the hot sauces now.
15:42:
Yukbang
17:38:
Yukbang. Close up this time. Shows all his trash from the food he's eaten already.
19:29:
Yukbang
20:44:
Snot flies out of his nose. Leaves to pick his nose or something. 5 left
24:18:
Yukbang. He gives up after this one. Shows his pile of trash again. Cleans up.
30:27:
Thinks he might be able to do one more.
31:17:
Yukbang.
33:13:
Cheeky wink
34:39:
Reads his receipt
Start:
Shills his wand. Wand will go towards his grocery bill. Wand is autographed and whoever buys it will also get an autographed bandana. Shills Teespring and PayPal. #youdon'thavetpdonatebutdonationsaregreatlyappreciated. Uploading a fast food challenge right now. Nit going live as often because he doesn't feel like it
4:30:
Talking about when he Snotted himself in taco Bell while filming his food challenge. He used the $25 taco Bell gift card he got in a care package.
6:17:
Close up of wand. Shows bandana. TMDWU
7:40:
8 people have the wand in his cart. Food challenge video is nearly uploaded. Going to make spicy cheetos mac and cheese for his next cooking video.
9:10:
Plays getting high in the clock tower
10:22:
Catches Deathbed Tapes shitposting in chat lol
12:04:
Guitar shredding. Shills wand, blocks trolls from chat. Bc rich #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement

EDIT: forgot this gem
 
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Dick Pooman said:
I was looking at the subreddit a little bit today and apparently, the guy who bought the green cockholster made a post there a little while back and he was promptly ridiculed off the page. People have been buying out Cobra's Etsy listings almost as soon as they're put up for way longer than that Discord has been around, so I don't think we can say for sure if the retard Discord is responsible for any of these big purchases.
Click to expand...
Very true. I was quite shocked when I learned that a "regular" person bought the cockholster. I guess this new group of fans really are dumb people with a lot of extra money to throw at somebody like Cobes for a laugh with friends. I respect it but don't agree with it. In my mind it's always been people like Courtney or Karla who will pony up money all the time because they're desperate for attention.
 
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TWU said:
Ive been searching for the specific law that states its a felony to hit people with autism. I will prob never find one
but Jorf has sent me on a mission. He says is with such conviction, I just want to believe.
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On a now blocked stream (Thanksgiving 2020 Video), I remember him asking his phone "Siri, is it illegal to hit a person with autism". I tip my hat to the people who programed Siri, because she did not say a fucking word when asked I think twice. He promptly gave up researching the topic after that and went on to sing songs to get the video blocked.
 
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SnusBurns said:
On a now blocked stream (Thanksgiving 2020 Video), I remember him asking his phone "Siri, is it illegal to hit a person with autism". I tip my hat to the people who programed Siri, because she did not say a fucking word when asked I think twice. He promptly gave up researching the topic after that and went on to sing songs to get the video blocked.
Click to expand...
Bless your memory, it's archived and timestamped in this post
I wrote that he googled if it was illegal to hit people with special needs

Sorry for double posting but LMAO
 
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Wand is ready to ship. The person who bought it will also get some tactical soap, a signed bandana and a certificate of authenticity,
Has an app that makes his voice sound like Darth Vader. Wand is in the mail. Going to work on his album. Messes with the voice app.
Start:
Turned the chat off to piss the right people off. Doing a drink combo using energy shots he got in a care package and beer. #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement doing a video response to a Terrence Pop video.
2:00:
Mixing up his drink combination talking about male feminists in it for the wrong reasons. Sent a wand out earlier.
3:35:
Stirs drink with wand
4:00:
Women pretend to care about men's rights just because they want to get married. Does dip.
5:59:
Tests the drink combo and starts the video.
6:45:
Chat is off and phone is on airplane mode to own the trolls. Back to the video
8:00:
4th wave feminism gives feminism a bad name. Back to the video
9:13:
Men saying they are feminists doesn't get them laid. Shills female empowerment t-shirt. Back to the video
11:00:
Kobes explains why male feminists don't get laid. Shills people suck I need a beer t-shirt. Date rape is bad. Gender relations
17:14:
Kobes is a male feminist and he is in the middle of a dry spell
18:16:
Gender relations
20:00:
It's okay to be single inspiration speech
21:22:
Consent ramblings
22:16:
Online dating getting cat fished. Gives relationship advice.
23:20:
Men get crap when they don't stay with their baby mama to help raise the child and this is unfair. Scenario of misbehaving child which was a result of a one night stand
26:30:
If Kobes had his dream house he could support a child. Gender relations is a distraction.
38:00:
Moar beer
29:00:
Harry Styles, Kobes lives John Legend. KingSoapraJFS . Back to the video for 2 seconds and then Gender relations rant.
31:20:
Vocal cover John Legend all of me
37:34:
Back to the video response
38:09:
Just stop giving male feminists a bad name/ climate change
41:40:
KingSoapraJFS
43:30:
Women don't have to do anything to impress men. Turns into complaining about women. Gender relations. Back to the video.
45:13:
Parrots what's said in the video. Thinks Gender inequality exists to distract us. Back to the video.
46:50:
Kobes explains genetics.
47:37:
Back to the video. Can't talk about female privilege without being called sexist but it's okay to talk about male privilege. Double standards! Back to the video.
49:17:
Moar beer. Gender relations. Dating scene.
53:00:
Don't ever make a move because women lie and you will go to jail for being a rapist.
54:17:
Back to the video for 2 seconds. Kobes respects women while calling them cunts.
56:41:
Gives relationship advice. Romantic bath Scenario.
1:00:00:
Scenario of obese couple won't go to the gym with each other. Talks about pizza he had. Sounds like he's saying asbestos cheese. Back to to the video for 2 seconds. Gender relations.
1:03:00:
Subscribe for more! Talks about gta5. Shills new shirt. Back to the video for 2 seconds.
1:05:24:
Reads what's written on the screen. Back to the video. Talks about sweet clocktower in Ottawa. Back to the video.
1:07:50:
Gender relations Double standards. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Gender relations. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Fake male feminists. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Life is hard enough for men without male feminists making things harder. Quite frankly it's frustrating YouTube.
1:12:00:
Scenario of ugly dude getting all the of age chicks.
2:13:55:
Moar beer. Drink combination mango Pepsi and bud light platinum. Cobras mist. Back to the video.
1:15:00:
Gets distracted by a raven. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Female oppression. Back to the video.
1:59:59:
Gender relations. Dumb people give feminism a bad name. Back to the video.
1:18:17:
Gold diggers.
1:19:57:
Kobes acting creepy about the chick on his screen. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Mgtow. Gender inequality is to distract everyone. Back to the video for 2 seconds. Fake male feminists. Back to the video
1:23:16:
So drunk, going to fall off his chair
1:24:00:
Makes another Cobras mist. Creepy comment about woman on screen. Scenario of couple getting bored with each other. Disrupts his Scenario with burps.
1:26:16:
Both sides! Double standards!
1:27:13:
Reads what's written on the screen. Gender relations/ relationship advice.
1:28:25:
Keeps leaning really far over the side of his chair. Gender relations. Frustrating that he can't use his position as a male feminist to make women have sex with him. Back to the video. Gender relations/ dating scene rant.
1:33:35:
Reads what's written on the screen. Kobes doesn't trust climate change studies. Piss break.
1:36:20:
Fake male feminists bad. Moar beer. Back to talking about Fake male feminists but also women lie.
1:39:00:
Kobes being creepy about the woman on the screen.
1:39:35:
Reads what's written on the screen. Kobes thinks this is all bullshit. Double standards. Back to the video.
1:41:10:
Scenario of girlfriend and Cheryl being frenemies. Gender relations.
1:45:20:
Both sides! Gender relations. Never give up your dignity!
1:47:15:
Math is hard when drinking beer.
1:48:10:
His album is different to the other album previously released with the same name. No copyright infringement intended.
1:49:49:
Dip. Kobes is a tobacco connoisseur
1:52:42:
Being lonely sucks.
1:53:43:
Double standards. Men can't cuck women.
1:54:00:
People suck I need a beer. Mango Pepsi and bud light platinum #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement
1:55:00:
Gender relations. Dating scene.
1:56:45:
Kobes acting creepy about the woman on the screen
1:57:54:
Reads what's written on the screen. Dry spell. Chaturbate.
1:59:30:
Online orgies is good clean fun. Double standards gender relations.
2:02:00:
Both sides Gender relations
2:04:10:
Wtf
2:06:00:
Women are the gatekeepers of sex
2:08:00:
Sometimes people settle for less. Double standards in media.
Has nearly 2 songs done for his album now. Going to work on more wands, one expensive wand and some cheaper wands for the next batch.
 
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