KiwiFarms Dating Thread

[pork and beans]

You guys need to go back to the bingo cards, it was funnier

 

[unfunny retard]

Lovely autistic lady watching this thread...it's me. I'm functionally retarded and a good listener. I will make an effort to get into your dumb hobbies if you make an effort to get into mine. Zero prospects and counting! Live a little

 

[Rome's rightful successor]

 

[DootSkeleton]

I also made a bingo card.
For reference, my A/S/L is 32/M/Oklahoma


I also did some of the cards earlier in the thread!

@Doppelmonger
19 (maybe 20) out of 25 squares


@gorgoroth7134
18 / 25 squares


@Pooner
15 / 25 squares


@Meiwaku
20 / 25

20 / 25 hard edition, might be 22 depending on a couple things


EvaXephon changed her name or left the site but this was hers:
16 / 25


Same story with Ofpoew:
21 / 25


Do these results make me a normie or cripplingly autistic?

 

[Pooner]

That bingo card was a mistake

 

[Celestial Peace]

Hello, I'm from Xinjiang
Male
5'8
40 years old
My hobbies include organ harvesting, bureaucratic paperwork and working Muslims to death
Would like to meet a single woman so we can share the paperwork at CCP and there's enough funghis in my pillow to start a colony (don't ask me why)

 

[Sneefy]

(don't ask me why)

Why?

 

[AnsemSoD1]

We need an officiaal CUCKOLDRY thread for all the yougn cucks joinign upo from 4chan reality timessz

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Yo, my name's Bradley Locke (it's a masculine name) and I'm 32, 6'6 with an athletic build, own a McMansion in a trendy suburb and I make $250,000 a year as a firefighting underwater basket weaving consultant. But you can just say I'm a firefighter when people ask me what I do for work. And before you ask, yes I have a full head of hair.

I'm looking for a woman who's ideally 30-40, curvy, and makes less than me. If you're unemployed, no problem! You can move in with me rent free and if you're a single mother, bring your kids along. That's what my 4 spare bedrooms are for after all. I've been waiting my entire life to save a single mom from her bad decisions for free, because that's what real men do. While you post memes about being a strong independent kween on Instagram and watch Netflix all day, you and your kids can rest easily knowing that you're being protected and provided for by a manly man! You don't even have to worry about cooking or cleaning and I won't even try to discipline your kids. That's a job for mama bear only!

I can also read your mind and know exactly what you want whenever you're playing the mindgames that drove away your last 2 baby daddies. I'm always dominant and confident 24/7, so you don't have to worry about getting the ick from me. The only emotions I have are the ones that are convenient for you. And baby, you can put that vibrator away because my porn star sized fat cock vibrates and ejaculates diamonds.

Hmu, bby.

 

[Michael McDoesntexist]

No fucking way there's actually women on this site (no troons, you are not women and never will be). Everyone knows that on the internet, the men are men, the women are men, and the kids are FBI agents. But on the off chance there are, hopefully there's 1 that appreciates nerds who are good at wrenching.

 

[555777555]

The date is 12 January 2025.

 

[Celestial Peace]

Why?

Ever heard of the cumbox story? It's the same but with a dakimakura.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

No fucking way there's actually women on this site (no troons, you are not women and never will be). Everyone knows that on the internet, the men are men, the women are men, and the kids are FBI agents. But on the off chance there are, hopefully there's 1 that appreciates nerds who are good at wrenching.

uwu i'm a pretty little woman and i would like to go out on a date with you i love you long time!

If you got that message, would you say it's more likely to be a tr00n or a glowie fishing for dick dna

 

[AnsemSoD1]

uwu i'm a pretty little woman and i would like to go out on a date with you i love you long time!

If you got that message, would you say it's more likely to be a tr00n or a glowie fishing for dick dna

Or an Indian.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

Or an Indian.

I think it would be more like "PLEASE MA'AM DO THE NEEDFUL AND PUT YOUR FOOT IN MY MOUTH I WILL RECEIVE, MY FAMILY WILL PRESENT YOU WITH FERMENTED COW URINE IF ONLY YOU STEP ON MY FACE PLEASE MA'AM!"

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

What if someone slides into your DM's but you notice she posts in the man hate thread in Beauty Parlor a lot?

 

[AnsemSoD1]

What if someone slides into your DM's but you notice she posts in the man hate thread in Beauty Parlor a lot?

On the one hand, fuck, on the other hand, I'm happy I don't have to explain the complexities and intricacies of the Farms to her.

 

[Generic Anime Girl]

if you don't fw woodland critters, we are not compatible!

 

[AnsemSoD1]

if you don't fw woodland critters, we are not compatible!

I like foxes, and while I don't know if they count, I like bats as well.

 

[Michael McDoesntexist]

What if someone slides into your DM's but you notice she posts in the man hate thread in Beauty Parlor a lot?

I already live in a major city full of feminists. This is nothing new, hopefully she's at least autistic enough to understand my love of cars.