Lolcow Lee Gerstmann

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Puppies.

They're shockingly racist!
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Sep 23, 2014
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This is Lee Gurstmann: Creative Writer, Poet and Appreciator of Fine Fashion

Lee has a fetish for superglued handshakes and women in tightly tucked-in sweaters and slacks. Fetish might not be the right word here. "Vaguely sexual obsession" might be better. He produces indecipherable videos about men shaking hands with women (in tightly tucked-in sweatshirts) for extended periods of time. Much of his time online is spent requesting help with his wild projects from people who want nothing to do with him.

I first encountered Mr. Gerstmann while making a series of sarcastic shitposts on Yahoo Answers. He was spamming the art and writing forums with requests for artists and writers for his stories. He wanted a picture of a woman who was trapped in a sweatshirt tucked in so tight that she couldn't take it off. I drew a deliberately terrible picture to audition for his "upcoming comic book"; he said it was perfect and gave me his email.

His latest project is a novel... or a movie, or something, about a woman in a tightly tucked-in sweater who refuses to let go of a man's hand because she loves him and is also an alien terrorist. He spammed like 300 different twitter accounts for famous movie stars and producers asking them to be a part of his film. The few responses were pretty funny, but unfortunately the whole series got wiped and I never capped it. The recipients included Queen Latifa and Gabriel Iglesias, who did not respond.
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His facebook is where the real gold is these days.
Very recently, he announced that he's being meddled with... by ghosts.
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I haven't done much digging in a while, so there's probably a wealth of information on his FB that I've missed out on. I thought you guys would appreciate this. With Lee, all you have to do is express a vague interest in what he's doing, and you'll become his favorite person ever.

I'm excited to see what this novel ends up being. We might be able to submit some ridiculous illustrations for it, because he can't say no to free art.

https://twitter.com/gerstmannlee
https://www.youtube.com/user/leegerstmann/videos
https://www.facebook.com/lee.gerstmann

EDIT: Of course he has a deviantArt.
http://gerstmannlee.deviantart.com/
https://www.authonomy.com/user/59733e91-bd80-4a41-b5a1-33d36d09bb2e/
https://answers.yahoo.com/activity/questions?show=I2CQ7N3ZWKA2NWUA2V5JTKHMBY&t=g
Thanks for this one, introman: http://lee1965.tripod.com/
http://creativeleefashion.blogspot.com/

Here's a collection of his best FB posts from the last year or so:

Creepin'
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The Black African and the Chinese
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Virgin With Rage
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Lee hires a whore. Possibly sarcasm.
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Lee's Love Quest
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Another suggestion that this may all be a ruse
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Lee's "art", created with the H&M fashion app
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This one is goes out to all the orientals.
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Lee may be Charlie Kelly
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Lee hates everyone in his family, especially his mom, apparently for giving him things.
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I completely missed his tripod. Thanks, I updated the OP.

EDIT: The site is pretty fucked up, there are parts that can't be reached from the sidebar or homepage. This is really confusing. http://lee1965.tripod.com/mayorpage/

EDIT 2: Wait, seriously how did you find that page. It's killing me.

EDIT 3: Ok I found it. http://lee1965.tripod.com/dresscode/ Seriously, who builds a site like this?
 
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This guy is creepy as fuck. Never in my life have I heard of a handshake fetishist. His obsession with women tucking in their shirts matches Wogglebug Lover's obsession with the Wogglebug.

He probably jacks off to the mona lisa or some shit because of hands
 
I completely missed his tripod. Thanks, I updated the OP.

EDIT: The site is pretty fucked up, there are parts that can't be reached from the sidebar or homepage. This is really confusing. http://lee1965.tripod.com/mayorpage/

EDIT 2: Wait, seriously how did you find that page. It's killing me.

EDIT 3: Ok I found it. http://lee1965.tripod.com/dresscode/ Seriously, who builds a site like this?

I thought I posted that. My bad. http://lee1965.tripod.com/site/ Here is the website for his hand shakes.
 
Idk, I don't think his dA counts for much. He hasn't been on it since he started it, and aside from the one deviation and journal, there's nothing really there. His other sites? Lols.
 
It makes sense that if foot fetishes exist one for hands or handshakes would too.

I wonder if his obsession with things being tight and tucked in is to do with the silhouette it presents, accentuating the waist and hips.

Whatever it is he creeps me out and I'm glad my clothes are baggy and untucked right now.
 
No, men have to wear whatever the women tell them to, that's part of the stipulations on page six of the "mayor" page. http://lee1965.tripod.com/mayorpage/id6.html



Check out this podcast, in which Lee and a mute, male dominatrix with cerebral palsy running for POTUS (Frank Moore) have a sit-down to talk about about fetishes. The dominatrix says that he's tired of people treating him badly because they watch his show about BDSM. Lee complains that all the women who like him already have boyfriends or don't like being objectified. He says his run for mayor was entirely for sexual gratification, so he could force women to wear tucked in shirts and slacks and shake his hand every day. Ostensibly, this is not satire, because what Lee and Frank call "satire" is far dumber than this.

At 18:52, Lee says he has a pseudonym: Gogo Pepperboy. This rabbit hole just got deeper.

I CAN'T TELL WHAT'S REAL ANYMORE SOMEONE HELP
https://www.facebook.com/gogo.pepperboy
This is Lee's idea of satire (Warning: Random Access Humor): http://www.frankmooreforpresident08.com/blog/2008/05/gogo-pepperboy-talks-about-frank-moore.html
 
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From his Twitter:

Do you know of any women authors who wear their shirts tucked in, as opposed to that lazy casual un-tucked look? I'd like to read them.

This is the sort of thing that makes people like this really frustrating to me. There's a difference between having a kink and wanting to inject that kink into every possible aspect of your life.
 
A number of his friends are poets from the area who saw him at local open mic nights. Do you mind me asking what the demographics of your mutual friends are?

If not:
Are they in college or age 18-24?
Are they women?
Do they habitually wear tightly tucked in sweaters and enjoy shaking hands with old men for extended periods of time?
Most importantly: Is one of them Sara Anika Mithra? I believe she's the co-star in many of Lee's videos.
 
The flyer thing makes me feel like he's chris chan 2.0
 
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