Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

So.... his idea of walls talking is basically this then? Except with a flatbill burial ground in the basement


Damn, the simpsons really does predict everything

and you have to wonder how long it'll be before lucas internally rages enough that the voices start telling him to get violent

Also lucas is mad at klickitat


and what the fuck......how does he go from 'klickitat is a misogynist' to singing about popeye....? also lol at claiming he is bipolar now. This is what his third differing claim of whats wrong with him now?
 
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WonderWino said:
Also lucas is mad at klickitat


and what the fuck......how does he go from 'klickitat is a misogynist' to singing about popeye....? also lol at claiming he is bipolar now. This is what his third differing claim of whats wrong with him now?
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I cannot tell you how absolutely hilarious it is that he adores me enough to not only write me a terrible song, but also sing it, and upload it for the public to see.

Flattered, but he's not really my type; he's just a little too racist, misogynistic, MRSA and Covid riddled, smelly, and to top it off he can't even make up for those things by being a good cook or having even an average sized dick.

Edit: The only thing he has going for me is that he gives such gold for thumbnails.

1613940552646.png
 
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WonderWino said:
So.... his idea of walls talking is basically this then? Except with a flatbill burial ground in the basement


Damn, the simpsons really does predict everything

and you have to wonder how long it'll be before lucas internally rages enough that the voices start telling him to get violent

Also lucas is mad at klickitat


and what the fuck......how does he go from 'klickitat is a misogynist' to singing about popeye....? also lol at claiming he is bipolar now. This is what his third differing claim of whats wrong with him now?
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With regards to Popeye tbh, Lucas does eat his spinach. Sadly, he burns it to a crisp, cross contaminates it, and then he drowns it in sriracha mayo and garlic salt. Then again maybe he was referring to Popeyes fried chicken, which we all know is bulletproof evidence to support his "I lost 200 lbs claim".
 
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WonderWino said:
and what the fuck......how does he go from 'klickitat is a misogynist' to singing about popeye....? also lol at claiming he is bipolar now. This is what his third differing claim of whats wrong with him now?
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Well Popeye does have a tattoo, and an argument could be made that his hat is a flatbill. Maybe when Lucas claims he's seeing these guys around, he's literally hallucinating that it's a cartoon character.

I also reckon Lucas would make a pretty good Bluto- he's giant, but completely unlikable in every way and all of his schemes to steal another guy's lady end up in constant abject failure.
 
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Big Redman Incorporated said:
Well Popeye does have a tattoo, and an argument could be made that his hat is a flatbill. Maybe when Lucas claims he's seeing these guys around, he's literally hallucinating that it's a cartoon character.

I also reckon Lucas would make a pretty good Bluto- he's giant, but completely unlikable in every way and all of his schemes to steal another guy's lady end up in constant abject failure.
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Bluto could land a punch, though.

Anyway...


Edit: Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure Popeye was always advocating for things like respecting women, not being a douchebag to other people, and when they couldn't do those two things he'd go apeshit and beat them up until they did. He must really be into me to associate me with that. :lunacy:
 
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klickitat said:
I cannot tell you how absolutely hilarious it is that he adores me enough to not only write me a terrible song, but also sing it, and upload it for the public to see.

Flattered, but he's not really my type; he's just a little too racist, misogynistic, MRSA and Covid riddled, smelly, and to top it off he can't even make up for those things by being a good cook or having even an average sized dick.

Edit: The only thing he has going for me is that he gives such gold for thumbnails.

View attachment 1939300
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What the actual hell? LOL

Listen, maybe it's my age, but what in the fuck is a dudebro? Why is it bad?
 
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Krathnami said:
Is that the face he made when he sucked off Jason Perva?
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I think your icon is closer to the face he probably made.

CrazyAsHell said:
What the actual hell? LOL

Listen, maybe it's my age, but what in the fuck is a dudebro? Why is it bad?
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It's more 90s slang; I think the closest modern equivalent would be would be a Chad, and it was never really meant as a real insult just sort of a gentle "making fun of a clueless fratboy type".

If you want the etymology of it, since I find that stuff interesting, https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/dudebro/ has a pretty good rundown of it.
 
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Gaear Grimsrud said:
Lucas bitching about not getting enough stimulus checks.

I don't know why they gave him ANY stimulus money.


I can't believe he got covid and is asymptomatic. Some of these lolcows are like roaches.
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Him going on about Capitalism being a mental disorder. No. Schizophrenia, bipolar, autism, and exceptionalism are mental disorders. All of which Lucas has.
 
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This is why atheists like Werner are themselves the best proof that there is no intelligent design, lmao. I think he's also the best living embodiment of the type of freaks and weirdos who scream "racist/sexist/bigot/homophobe", or what the hell ever on social media as though they're still arrested in infancy and think that just screaming a silly "power word" will immediately summon their mommy and have all of their infantile needs taken care of.

Lusting after young girls is just TAB (Typical atheist behavior).
 
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darkwingosonichugorl said:
Lucas demanding $1000/month and all the gibsmedats is infuriating. He's the epitome of the negative stereotype that many have concerning us folks on SSI, while most of us are actually extremely grateful that we receive the help we get.
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Exactly. My thought is, if he is looking for a country that will hand him money for absolutely not a fucking thing, we should all pool our money and send his ass to one of them.....gtfoh with that shit.
 
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darkwingosonichugorl said:
Lucas demanding $1000/month and all the gibsmedats is infuriating. He's the epitome of the negative stereotype that many have concerning us folks on SSI, while most of us are actually extremely grateful that we receive the help we get.
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This right here! In Northern Ontario we had a UBI pilot program and people making minimum wage or less could receive $1000/month no strings attached. As it turned out hospitalization rates went down, domestic violence rates dropped, kids from low income families were doing better in school and more young people were free to pursue a post-secondary education while working part-time. Sadly the program got cut by the Tory government to the dismay of intelligent fiscal conservatives and progressives alike who noticed social services like policing and healthcare are more expensive to the tax payer than giving people a little stimulus to help alleviate the societal ills of poverty that lead to higher hospitalization and incarceration rates in the first place. Give people opportunities for advancement and they won’t piss it away unless they are Lucas in which case they’ll just check out of society with the money and live in a fart box which Lucas can’t even achieve like a normal lazy person that just wants to smoke weed and play video games all day.
 
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Krathnami said:
Not only that, but when he pisses away his chances, like he did with Pioneer Pathway House, he’s taking the spot of someone who might actually appreciate it.
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And he won't accept the limitations his lifestyle naturally brings him.

He wants to be a belligerent, unmedicated loon who lives on government handouts all his life, but he also wants all the perks of being a functional member of society, like respect, admiration, and being somebody that a woman might want to settle down with.
 
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