Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Granola Grenadine]

ANYWAY.

NGL, I'm still disappointed by how the Hollywern Saga ended. I forget, though: did he buy that one way ticket to LA himself or did his catfish pay for it? If the former, would stuff like that get him in trouble with whoever is handling his case? AFAIK, even one way plane tickets aren't exactly dirt cheap for people living on tugboat money, pandemic or no.

 

[21st Century Schizoid Jew]

All skitzo ramblings aside, I feel like it’s just a matter of time before Lucas gets consistent access to the internet and continues trying to boink teenagers, make signs and generally act like a nonfunctional member of society.

Now for your regularly scheduled programming.

Maybe we should send him a phone? Maybe to cannon? Lucas if you see this, blink twice into the wind to let us know your ok.

I think sending him a phone or anything if the sort is poking the cow a little too much. I highly doubt this lull in his activity will last longer than a couple months.

 

[Fatal Walter]

He must have gotten the rest of it filtered with something he said after that because I can't find the comment. I only noticed it because I'm being a lazy piece of shit this week in the first place. Good to know Lucas is being an excellent boyfriend to Isik, though. Fucking hell, what is he thinking

 

[teleméres69]

Blame the exceptional person who bailed out a pedophile. Creeps take care of their own after all

ANYWAY.

NGL, I'm still disappointed by how the Hollywern Saga ended. I forget, though: did he buy that one way ticket to LA himself or did his catfish pay for it? If the former, would stuff like that get him in trouble with whoever is handling his case? AFAIK, even one way plane tickets aren't exactly dirt cheap for people living on tugboat money, pandemic or no.

I thought Goldaor left social media before the LA saga. What a fucking jackass if he did. It was bad enough he enabled Lucas to begin with, giving him all the junk food to inflate his ego. Imagine supporting a pedophile who's own parents have all but disowned. Interesting hill to die on if it was him

The catfish bought the ticket for him, and apparently the return bus ticket was bought by goldaor, probably cause he figured he might have created a situation that could backfire on him if something happened to lucas while stuck there. tldr: lucas showed up in LA with literally no money and so little preparation he didn't even shower for weeks before getting on the plane. I bet the people on board and crew were real happy with him that day

"I'd be an excellent boyfriend"
The only woman he's ever been with ended with domestic violence and a no contact order. I would love to see how Lucas interprets reality

He must have gotten the rest of it filtered with something he said after that because I can't find the comment. I only noticed it because I'm being a lazy piece of shit this week in the first place. Good to know Lucas is being an excellent boyfriend to Isik, though. Fucking hell, what is he thinking
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[Da Dude123]

He must have gotten the rest of it filtered with something he said after that because I can't find the comment. I only noticed it because I'm being a lazy piece of shit this week in the first place. Good to know Lucas is being an excellent boyfriend to Isik, though. Fucking hell, what is he thinking
View attachment 2194318

The cow is really making good use of his half hour of library Internet time. Having to defend himself by making comments about how he is plenty good. At least, this lets us know he is not in jail or the mental ward. I bet not being able to make his memes or his videos demanding a hot Gen Z girlfriend is wearing on him.

Come on, Fatty. Get a phone! Tugboat your ass to Metro By T-Mobile and get a cheap Android phone. What are you? A bigot? Do it!

 

[AbraCadaver]

Here-- I'll explain it in terms even a woman should be able to grasp:

Tom Cruise thinks that people with mood problems should just pop some vitamin C, jump over their couches, and meet him at the Scientology church tonight in order to be healed.

I said that people with actual brain diseases belong under the care of neurologists.

That means doctors who deal with diseases of the brain. Not PMS or Daddy Issues Disorder like what Dr. Shekelstein told you you have before he renewed your 'zac for the month-- but actual medical diseases like epilepsy and palsies and all that yucky stuff.

Get it yet, pumpkin spice?

Anyway how the hell has Lucas gone this long without a phone? It seemed like his security blanket for ages. I just keep picturing him making do now by yelling into a sandwich under an overpass all day.

 

[21st Century Schizoid Jew]

Anyway how the hell has Lucas gone this long without a phone? It seemed like his security blanket for ages. I just keep picturing him making do now by yelling into a sandwich under an overpass all day.

He’s gotta have family or something to make sure he can’t make any further fuck ups while he’s grounded? Or maybe no stimmy money means no phone?

 

[Cheesegirl78]

The cow is really making good use of his half hour of library Internet time. Having to defend himself by making comments about how he is plenty good. At least, this lets us know he is not in jail or the mental ward. I bet not being able to make his memes or his videos demanding a hot Gen Z girlfriend is wearing on him.

Come on, Fatty. Get a phone! Tugboat your ass to Metro By T-Mobile and get a cheap Android phone. What are you? A bigot? Do it!

Do the cheap phone places have limits on how many phones you can buy/activate in a certain time period?
Did he leave a note for a Metro by T-Mobile clerk describing his super sperm and get banned from all of their stores in the Spokane area?

 

[Da Dude123]

Do the cheap phone places have limits on how many phones you can buy/activate in a certain time period?
Did he leave a note for a Metro by T-Mobile clerk describing his super sperm and get banned from all of their stores in the Spokane area?

There might be. However, you could hop between Metro, Boost, and Cricket. I think those deals can be had so long as you haven't got another deal from them in the past 90 days.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

There might be. However, you could hop between Metro, Boost, and Cricket. I think those deals can be had so long as you haven't got another deal from them in the past 90 days.

I forgot about Boost and Cricket, we don't have them in my area, AFAIK.

 

[Zaz]

ANYWAY.

NGL, I'm still disappointed by how the Hollywern Saga ended. I forget, though: did he buy that one way ticket to LA himself or did his catfish pay for it? If the former, would stuff like that get him in trouble with whoever is handling his case? AFAIK, even one way plane tickets aren't exactly dirt cheap for people living on tugboat money, pandemic or no.

He wasn't supposed to leave, but alas.

 

[Telomere Savalas]

No way he's off social media by his own decision. Likely scenarios:
- His phone/bidenbux were jacked by Isaac, et. al.
- Payee is withholding more money from him trying to get him a place to live, so no money for a new phone.
- A lawyer has advised, or a judge has ordered, that he stay off social media.
- He's "off the grid" (in his mind) to avoid legal trouble.

Don't enable him. That's what he's waiting for.

 

[Da Dude123]

We haven't heard any updates from the Nobleman lately. He usually has the best info on the hobo's whereabouts.

If Lucas is banned from the shelters, is he also banned from getting food from them? I do not know the spots where free food is given out in Spokane. I know shelters give meals and sometimes churches (those greedy Christians).

Lucas gets his food stamps and tugboat. But he has lost his access to the toaster oven and other cooking conveyances. So, he can't really cook then and he is too lazy to build a hobo fire and cook up a can of baked beans. We know he is still hitting up the high end restaurants. He most likely would choose his fancy meals over a phone.

He very well may be in some sort of squatter home or crack house or opium den. Maybe his ban from HOC is done? It seems like they keep letting him back in there, despite having violated the rules many times. They ban him for 40 days and 40 nights and then welcome him back till he chimps out or harrases a student nurse. Rinse repeat.

I wonder where that faggot is staying at?

 

[Free the Pedos]

- A lawyer has advised, or a judge has ordered, that he stay off social media.

People keep floating this idea, but is this something that has ever happened, especially to someone convicted of misdemeanors? I could see a judge dishing that out to a pedo convicted of luring children online, but Lucas hasn't done that (yet, due to his own idiocy).

 

[wenttobermuda]

People keep floating this idea, but is this something that has ever happened, especially to someone convicted of misdemeanors? I could see a judge dishing that out to a pedo convicted of luring children online, but Lucas hasn't done that (yet, due to his own idiocy).

I've seen it happen. To pedos, mostly, and a couple of the capitol rioters.

Courts are loathe to restrict internet access. I do not believe a community court judge adjudicating a petty trespassing charge would order a defendant off the internet. Furthermore, I do not believe Lucas is capable of complying with such an order.

Can you imagine an authority figure that would care enough about Lucas to tell him to get off the internet? An authority figure that Lucas would listen to?

The more I think about it, the more Lucas's presumed lack of phone seems attributable to an internal cause. But it can't be a product of Lucas's making a good decision. I take it as an article of faith that Lucas doesn't make those.

 

[AngelOfDeath]

I'm starting to think he has gotten on hard drugs. He doesnt want to make videos blasted out of his mind, for all his adoring fans to see, and ofc us fruits to call him on it. Another reason to support it would be to get closer to his target demographic. They cant run if they are passed out, with a fist up their ass. They do drugs, he copy cats in an attempt to create familiarity. Anyone knows if your bad off for a fix, you'd sell your soul* let alone a phone you may not even have anything vested in. I know its a stretch here, but lack of content really got me wondering wth is going on...

Edit - fixed autism.

 

[TurdFondler]

If he was doing meth he'd be posting nonstop and making manic signs, so if anything it's downers. Probably fent. I don't see him as a hard drug user though

 

[Stornoway]

Lucas is not doing any hard drugs because he is too scared of both getting his ass beat for mouthing off to the wrong person while under the influence and of the slight chance of doing time for said drugs. He is terrified of being locked up.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

People keep floating this idea, but is this something that has ever happened, especially to someone convicted of misdemeanors? I could see a judge dishing that out to a pedo convicted of luring children online, but Lucas hasn't done that (yet, due to his own idiocy).

Powerlevel: I've had multiple lawyers strongly suggest me to shut up and delete fucking everything on Youtube and social media.

I don't see how any judge in the western world could force anyone to not go online, though. Maybe to pedophiles with like tracking stuff, but Lucas isn't even a sex offender.

 

[Czolg]

Lucas probably found his gen z bae and finally inherited Elk Kingdom which he rules under new name as the King Roy II Totally not Fat Faggot.

Or so he wishes.