Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

Who else kind of wishes Lucas would get back on Facebook and Instagram? His memes are often times more enjoyable than some of these long videos. The golden days were when Lucas had his Facebook wide open and he was blocking people left and right who said mean things to him. He has probably forgot the passwords to them, but it doesn't mean he can't just make new ones.
 
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wenttobermuda said:
Lucas collected games he doesn't play. Wernologists accuse him of sublimating his poon poon thirst into his games for good reason: Dance of the Telomeres, and the Meeple Toss Puss Puss Trap. Granted, Lucas is not making game mechanics specifically about fitting big meaty fists in buttholes yet, but the erotic Lucas boardgame is on the horizon if he keeps at it. Maybe you'll be one of Lucas's electric swimmers, with the goal to be to get at the Zoomer Egg first. It'll play like Monopoly but with jizz.

Lovely.

I'll leave it to others to catalogue Lucas's many flaws, and pick apart this cursed pic to forcefully articulate just how unappealing it is (concentrate on his chest, please). I'll focus on the language. Not the body language, which is just too foul to translate into English. Really, he ought to be ashamed.

REAL MEN STAND UP FOR THE RIGHTS OF WOMEN AND GIRLS!

Lucas is laying on his back, exposing his upper body, trying to put on a Zoolander face. Lucas is presenting himself to be appreciated. Look at me, Lucas Colby Werner, a sexual being.

With this "meme" Lucas is asserting that he is a real man (again), and claiming that he...stands up for the rights of women. And also, girls. Girls. Real man. Lucas's assertion is flatly contradicted by the pic itself. And the fem pandering, that's just a cherry on the already perfect combination of image and language, especially in the context of Lucas's rather menacing relationships to girlhood.

A fat, helpless aspiring rapist lays on his back and calls out into the net ether: girls, I'm a real man, girl's, I'm a real man.

ETA: If the fat faggot is going to stream, he is not off to a promising start.
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Also, his nips appear to be different sizes.

I'm not going to whip out a ruler or anything, but gosh darn it, pepperoni should be consistent.

So much for Blue Steel. I guess "slightly concussed lobotomy patient" doesn't quite have the same ring to it.

Edit: anyone trying to locate his new digs; he's walking distance from a "lending library" and a game store OTHER than Uncle's.
 
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Yeah, I'd really prefer memes to videos for the most part. On the subject of how he got into board games, it was actually from one of his stays at the mental hospital. I have no idea what the source video was and there's way too many for me to want to look for it but I posted this about 2 months ago.

"Oh yeah, I don't think I mentioned it but it turns out I was wrong about why Lucas started making board games. I thought he saw college kids playing them but actually it was because he was playing with people at the mental hospital. I guess he was doing alright socially and even winning. It was like the validation he never gets. Probably because he was on his medication at the time and easier to be around. But Lucas decided the missing thing wasn't the medication but the board games so the solution here was to get back off his meds and create a bunch of his own nonsensical board games. Yeah, the rest is history. He won't see that as the solution unless he wants to."

I've now changed my mind yet again. I doubt any kind of medication will fix Lucas being a miserable asshole nobody wants to be around. I guess all they can do is try to "mitigate" his natural personality.
 
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Gaear Grimsrud said:
I think another reason for the board game obsession is because it makes it seem like he's busy, he's doing things, he's got stuff going on, he's not just sitting on his ass all day waiting to be fed.
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It also gives him something where he thinks he’s an expert (or at least well informed), so he feels he gets to be an elitist
 
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He sounds like a kid making up rules snow cloud freezes gun so you can defeat the enemy klickitat with your made up combos. It’s like the similar train of logic when he had the idea of luring the haters into the street so he could throw a grenade from the window of a building. The way he addresses real life situations is not much different than his board game schemes
 
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GleamingTheQ-Bert said:
You hit the nail on the head. He sees board games as an avenue for meeting women, but they serve one more purpose: they let Lucas demonstrate how smart he thinks he is. He gets to talk about complex things, and use Big technical specific language. Other than these two, and being an outlet for his schizo "creativity" (read: nonsense) I don't see him having any real interest in them.

When you think about it though, that's everything in his life. If you can't use it to gratify an urge, or use it to boast, use it to associate himself with a group that he's deemed positive, opposite a group he's deemed negative, he has no interest in it.

It's one of the reasons why when goldaor (speaking of goldie, does it bother anyone else how Lucas still calls him "gal-dor" after all this time?) gave him the DS, he barely touched it. Lucas doesn't have any interest in playing games for their own sake, or for fun. If it's not satisfying a lust, or allowing him to brag, he's out.
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I didn't know about the DS but it makes a lot of sense. He's so consumed with his monomania that he can't, and doesn't want to, break his mind away from it for something as "pointless" and as human as having some mindless fun with a video game. As I've said before it's the obsession, the bone-deep fixation with his fantasy, that characterizes Lucas as a cow and as an abnormal psych case study. Anything that broke his mind away from it even for short periods would be extremely good for him even if it wasn't productive in and of itself, a la video games. Holy shit, wait a minute, is Lucas such a loser that his mental health and life in general would be improved by wasting more time playing video games?!

Friends, colleagues, the science of Wernology continues to make astounding new discoveries in the absolute cutting edge limits of loseristics, shitheadology, and applied theoretical insanity! (polite applause as drinks are served)
 
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Of course Lucas listens to dubstep. Lucas has a new word ‘kekistocracy’ and talks about his short story, “wound.”
BCEC9EB6-9914-43F5-B623-80AD6E3E235E.jpeg
 
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It's not Motel 6 , he wants to stay at the Davenport hotel for a weekend. At Bistango he'll drop he's staying at the Davenport impressing all the Gen Z baes and he'll waddle back to the hotel with a hot bae in tow.

Outcasowls - 30 of spokanes most popular attractions video.
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GleamingTheQ-Bert said:
Does anyone have any idea whether any of his games are actually playable? I know his descriptions of them make them seem unplayable nonsense, but is that actually so?
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You know, I have started pull out his board game themes during discussions in game design, a little fun project a lot of game designers enjoy is seeing how fast they can come up with a rough abstraction of an idea for a board game. We've produced multiple playable games, I then present his rambling explanations of his version, and everyone in the conversation starts head desking.

I tend to play a lot of "Oh ho ho, yes this board game is very complex, I am very smart for being able to understand how complex it is" board games (spoiler alert, while there are plenty of good board games with that reputation, they are rarely as complex as the people who play them want you to think. The complexity is in the strategy, that or they just require a specific routine that can easily be ran through with a cheat sheet, and in reality aren't that complex) and even then I look at Werners crap and scratch my head trying to understand what he wants the mechanics to even be. They are certainly playable, but in the same way Werner is certainly a member of society. In the strictest binary sense, it is true.
 
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Maxxicus Callahan said:
He looks like a leering alien creature from this unflattering angle. I guess he looks bad from all angles doing this.
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That's what it reminded me of.

This was, hands down, the best part of his latest stream.



You all heard it from the PhD Candidate: You're is now spelled yoe're.

Adjust your realities accordingly.

Gaear Grimsrud said:
He doesn't seem well in these recent videos. I mean even less so than usual. He seems jumpy and agitated.
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Bet he'll be either homeless or back in the psych ward by the 15th at the latest.
 
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klickitat said:
This was, hands down, the best part of his latest stream.

View attachment 2490245

You all heard it from the PhD Candidate: You're is now spelled yoe're.

Adjust your realities accordingly.



Bet he'll be either homeless or back in the psych ward by the 15th at the latest.
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Okay, the stuff he said about that guy's mother and father was for real, some of the nastiest, meanest stuff I've ever heard him say. I'm going to laugh long and hard when he's homeless again. Lucas is such a horrible person.

Edit: someone be sure to archive it, him wishing death on someones mother and father, after telling them to sleep with their mother, is exactly the sort of sound bite that would come back to bite him in the ass.
 
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