Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

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Looks like lucas is baiting for a zoomer bae again:
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You and the cop pretending to be a 16 year old letting you incriminate yourself i'm sure
 
Lucas's cow posts are starting to heat up. I guess Malon Place had a bingo night? For a guy who always reees about hating money, he loves to talk about how much things cost. $30 hoodie. And of course fatty is mad that a fat girl won it, instead of his fat ass.

A friend who will pay for his first date "when I find her". Who the hell is this friend? For people who have been single for a while, lots of first dates or even 2nd or third dates turn into no further dates. Lucas would mooo and reee if he ever scraped up the money and found a woman to take to dinner and she ghosted him after. This won't happen, we know. A date for Lucas is not in the cards for him. But Lucas has no idea how dating or anything about it works.

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Lucas's cow posts are starting to heat up. I guess Malon Place had a bingo night? For a guy who always reees about hating money, he loves to talk about how much things cost. $30 hoodie. And of course fatty is mad that a fat girl won it, instead of his fat ass.

A friend who will pay for his first date "when I find her". Who the hell is this friend? For people who have been single for a while, lots of first dates or even 2nd or third dates turn into no further dates. Lucas would mooo and reee if he ever scraped up the money and found a woman to take to dinner and she ghosted him after. This won't happen, we know. A date for Lucas is not in the cards for him. But Lucas has no idea how dating or anything about it works.

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Wow! He used to brag about being able to buy a potential date a nice cut of steak. Now he's reduced to "my friend will pay for our first date". Pathetic. I wonder what the limit is. How much money is this 'friend' willing to give to this useless leach?
 
Lucas's cow posts are starting to heat up. I guess Malon Place had a bingo night? For a guy who always reees about hating money, he loves to talk about how much things cost. $30 hoodie. And of course fatty is mad that a fat girl won it, instead of his fat ass.

A friend who will pay for his first date "when I find her". Who the hell is this friend? For people who have been single for a while, lots of first dates or even 2nd or third dates turn into no further dates. Lucas would mooo and reee if he ever scraped up the money and found a woman to take to dinner and she ghosted him after. This won't happen, we know. A date for Lucas is not in the cards for him. But Lucas has no idea how dating or anything about it works.

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Those posts really, really highlight lucas's utter lack of self awareness and level of stupidity. Aside from the fact he's a man in his mid 40s talking about how he's playing bingo at a nursing home and bitching about not winning a hoodie, he outed himself as a dumbass and narcissistic as fuck with his comment about her. Look at what he said again:

Fat, boisterous chick won the $30 hoodie I wanted in bingo. I normally wouldn't care but it would have fit me perfectly and shes there enjoying it with her massive gut hanging out of the bottom, thinking shes attractive. When did they start thinking they were hot like supermodels at any size? Ridiculous

Think about what he just said. He flat out admits the shirt would fit him perfectly and immediately follows it up with and shes there enjoying it with her massive gut hanging out of the bottom thinking shes attractive. If it fits her and it would fit him perfectly it means he has to be fat as fuck himself. That should be blatantly obvious to him but it clearly isn't. He's outing himself as a fat fuck, while bitching about obese people thinking they're attractive and how ridiculous. That is something lucas does constantly despite being morbidly obese himself. Lucas needs to look in the mirror. He's fat and boisterous constantly and takes pride in it. He's projecting like an imax at that woman, and you just know he was glaring with his crazy eyes and seething when she won

and a friend who will pay for lucas's first date? So much for the days of lucas trying to bribe other people with $100 to hook him up with a date and $1000 to her to have said date with him. Now he's reduced to bragging that some other random person will pay for his date with some zoomer bae. Yeah thats totally what a zoomer bae wants to hear from a date. Go ahead baby order whatever you want its all being paid for by my friend from the nursing home. I'm sure she'll be very impressed with that and won't run screaming for the hills

Club Sandwich said:
if Lucas is going to a bingo hall, is he hitting up on seniors now, or does this imply attempts at group games (trivia, bowling, et c) to meet people? maybe it's an arrangement by his group home.
Its a nursing home so things like bingo are pretty common. Probably simple things seniors can do like ring tosses and trivia. Says alot about lucas that this is what he has been reduced to. Associating with half senile invalid seniors and mental patients. Perhaps one of the senile residents thinks lucas is their grandson and offered to help out with paying for dates so he can finally get married and provide some great grandkids. Its not as uncommon as you might think in my experience and lucas is definitely manipulative and unethical enough to play along with it to his benefit. But if the staff ever found out he'd get the cops called on his ass

EDIT:

uh oh, he's getting unhinged and confrontational again:
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Yeah i'm sure this totally happened. He seems to have forgotten he nearly shit his pants when somebody told him to shut the fuck up faggot, which is likely what happened this time and made him big mad after. I guess its ok when lucas calls others faggots and niggers but he's totally justified in getting angry and threatening when others do it in front of him then?

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So god is a flatbill maga supporter now according to lucas? or is he trying to imply people will pray to trump like a god cause lucas claims he got into some guys face?
 
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Yeah i'm sure this totally happened. He seems to have forgotten he nearly shit his pants when somebody told him to shut the fuck up faggot, which is likely what happened this time and made him big mad after.
Oh man that video where the guy yells shut the fuck up and Lucas stops ranting and looks around was a classic pure kino, I wish he would get up to antics like that again. This nursing home saga is boring compared to troll sleeping under the bridge lucas
 
lol no one understands my plight indeed. If anyone doesn't understand lucas's plight its lucas himself. His plight is his own doing. He put himself in his situation and made a point of going out of his way to fuck things up for himself every time he's been given or had anything, whether that was an actual girlfriend who tolerated him (i'll still never understand how the fuck that even happened), free money (either blown on pointless shit or flashing it around until some other hobo steals it), housing (goes out of his way to fuck with people in some way until he gets thrown out) or anything else. Literally everything in lucas's insane world revolves around him and everyone exists and matters only in so far as a way in which they can somehow be useful to him. Lucas can't even associate with other people for long because of this attitude. Its always ok you're my friend and we talk and do shit but what have you done for me lately? why aren't you hooking me up? where are the zoomer baes phone numbers? where is the party at bigot? I bought you a $2 taco! I stole extra food from the food bank or an extra slice people giving pizza out to hobos at the shelter and gave it to you! you owe me! you're a bigot for not giving me what I want now! what?! where are you going?! you're a bad person for not giving me what I want! which leads lucas to always be the victim in his mind no matter what he does. He was the victim when he tried to blackmail his neighbors and got thrown out on the street, he was the victim when he got creepy with little girls and got kicked out of starbucks and multiple shelters, he was the victim when he got catfished to LA to meet a 16 year old in a hotel room despite it being blatantly obvious it was a catfish and multiple people telling him not to do it, even playing victim with someone he believed at the time to be said 16 year olds father. and of course he's the victim now that he managed to by some miracle actually find a place that allowed him to stay there despite his history and behavior, takes most of his money on rent and food and leaves him surrounded with people just like him 24/7 with no money to gorge himself on trash food. He's literally getting a taste of his own medicine of what its like to be around nutcases like himself and even then its a pampered life for someone in his position and its still poor me nobody understands how bad my plight is. In any other country - even canada he'd be dead or completely batshit living in the woods yelling at squirrels by now. Even canada with all its claims of social healthcare and all that just dump people like lucas in either east vancouver or the shithole areas around toronto to fend for themselves. Lucas would not survive either place, especially east vancouver. Though he would piss himself at the thought of spending his welfare money at all the sushi restaurants and creeping on all the asian teens in the streets

Lucas does not recognize his own behavior and actions as causing all the consequences he went through. He does not understand that other people are not nearly as stupid as he is nor that they see exactly what kind of person he is very quickly when they interact with him. He does not understand for the life of him how the people that watch his antics are always multiple steps ahead of him, accurately predicting the outcomes of his crackpot actions days or weeks in advance as soon as he announces them. How everyone knew the bribing people for dates and numbers wouldn't work, how the games were garbage and wouldn't sell, how the crypto shit was an obvious scam and would get him into some trouble with his bank. Its one of the reasons he gets so angry at us, because he knows everyone else is smarter than him no matter how much he tries to build himself up as some great misunderstood telomere scientist that just happens to not have bothered with the inconvenience of getting a degree. Its also one of the reasons he doesn't want potential dates to know anything about his online history and such, cause he doesn't want any teen girl thinking three steps ahead of what obvious bs grooming shit he's trying to pull on her, see his predatory shit coming and a) call him on it (which he can't stand and makes him go right mental) or b) report him for it to the cops or his wranglers and get him into serious trouble. Its why you see the only people lucas associates with at his fartbox palace are the ones who are even stupider than he is. He knows they're the only ones who are simply too brain damaged to see lucas for what he is or call him on it. He likes being the 'smart one' (and I use that word very, very, very generously there) and even then lucas gets angry and frustrated when trying to show off his genius to them and getting bested at literally his own game doing shit like forcing them to play his looney board games. Its just one of the many ways he attempts to exploit those around him when he thinks he can get away with it (remember trying to sell jamies dice and tshirt? that idea sure did quietly disappear in a hurry) If anything mallon place is exactly the sort of place where he should not be allowed, let alone without direct supervision when he's interacting with the less intelligent residents. Hes manipulative, dangerous and will attempt to abuse and exploit them and has a long history of doing this. Hell even in his 2010 reflections he admitted to doing such things to his younger brother as a kid to get what he wanted and only stopped when said brother agreed to 'teach' lucas how to interact with people without scaring them right the fuck off immediately. Something that clearly didn't go so well, but you do have to wonder if this is how he is now what lucas must have been like interacting with people before spending years having the obvious explained to him constantly

That said, as predicted, spring is here and lucas is starting to escalate his crazy and get pushy for teen puss puss. I wonder if we're in for another summer of wern with him spazzing out due to not having any money or teen queen girlfriend. He's due for another meltdown at this point and sure doesn't like his existence at mallon place or the things it deprives him of. Sooner or later lucas's greed always wins out

EDIT:

He's getting pissy about not being able to find a fecund zoomer teen on the internet again:
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Passive aggressive as usual

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Brokeposting reminding us that no matter what lucas tries to claim he's an exploitative creep and has been since long before the starbucks incident made him famous

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Holy shit he uses alot of oil to cook eggs. He must have had some serious eggshits after that
 
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How can he make frying up eggs look that unappetizing? Eggs. How much more simple can you get?
I have had some egg catastrophes, but first of all, why the fuck oil? Bacon grease is the shit or butter at the very least. It's retarded to fry eggs in oil. Also what did this fat retard even do to fuck them up this badly? I've never seen eggs look like this bad even if I fucked up over-easy and decided to just pretend I'd intended to make scrambled all along.
 
How can he make frying up eggs look that unappetizing? Eggs. How much more simple can you get?

It’s like he goes out of his way to horrify with his culinary catastrophes.
The worst part is he probably poured the grease on top of them as some kind of sauce after he was finished cooking them. and used it as a dip

Edit:

Back to bitching about people questioning his interest in '24 or so year olds' as if he hasn't spent years creeping on and stating his desire to have a teen girl at least as young as 15
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Also lol at the projection he's doing bitching about other people 'batting their ogre eye' while his own picture is his creepy fucked up pupil eye. The lack of self awareness lucas has never ceases to amaze me
 
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You want a relationship or a FWB with a beautiful woman, do you, Lucas? Well, that's too bad, Tubby! It's not in the cards for you!

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FWB Eh? What happened to his whole, oft repeated, shtick that his love quest wasn't about sex it was about marriage, companionship, kids, true happiness etc? Also, Lucas doesn't have friends (with or without benefits) so that's especially hilarious.
 
and you just know he's putting all kinds of creepy teen shit into those AI prompts when he's not doing game related shit. No doubt thinking he's extremely clever and found a loophole for creating some creepy as fuck teen porn
Never forget that Lucas shared this:
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Not only did he basically admit-without-admitting that he was putting old man & teen girl prompts into AI, but also seemed to assume that normal people will see this image of the cross-eyed old man and the teen girl in a bikini and imagine them hooking and somehow not be disturbed.
 
Never forget that Lucas shared this:
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Not only did he basically admit-without-admitting that he was putting old man & teen girl prompts into AI, but also seemed to assume that normal people will see this image of the cross-eyed old man and the teen girl in a bikini and imagine them hooking and somehow not be disturbed.
That looks like he told the prompt to create an image of a creepy sex offender version of eugene levy cosplaying colonel sanders staring creepily at an underage teen stripper

It makes him look really bad and he doesn't have the slightest clue that it does

Remember that this is the stuff he shows publicly and thinks is appropriate and normal. Imagine what he's keeping on his phone and not saying anything about. I'd laugh my fucking ass off if lucas got catfished out of the country and ended up busted for cp at customs because some customs agent searched his phone, saw the creepy teen AI pics and arrested him because loli tier shit happens to be considered cp in that particular country

That would be the perfect way for lucas's saga to end
 
Some recent mooo cow posts from "lil cow" Lucas Werner.
Lucas doesn't even understand the difference between imaginary and non imaginary. I can say a pronoun, I can hold money in my hand, those things actually exist. There is no comparison with a god you can neither prove nor entirely disprove. Even the simplest concepts and comparisons are too complicated for lucas it seems

and of course he's bragging about coffee making him shit. He really loves talking about his shit. What happened to the days of lucas only ever ordering hot chocolate when he waddled to starbucks cause by his own admission he couldn't handle the caffeine. He outed his previous lies with his little coffee brag. I'm not surprised at all he would brag about nursing home coffee either, lucas doesn't know utter trash quality coffee when he tastes it.a government nursing home has the lowest quality of just about everything. No surprise at all that it makes him shit either, you just know thats intentional given the age of the average resident

His god existing outside space and time therefore even if it existed it shouldn't be able to interact with us doesn't make sense either. We don't have the slightest idea how such things actually work to the degree we would need to in order to accurately make a statement like that. Its also a pretty questionable thing to say regardless, after all, we see demonstrated proof of similar concepts that show the opposite. Take the sims for example. You exist entirely outside that world, which has all kinds of different laws of physics and you can't directly exist in it, yet you as the player can interact with it and affect it

I find it very unlikely that any fat boisterous woman (he seems to like this term lately) actually used the phrase whats up beeotch' to him. That sounds exactly like the sort of thing lucas has a history of making up. It also sounds alot like how he himself talked by his own admission when he was younger. He's also in no position to be calling anyone else fat, gross or disrespectful

Lucas can't even lie in a way that makes sense. a woman going around a nursing home calling males chica? That by definition refers to a female not a male. But of course lucas doesn't know anything about spanish so he makes something up based on stereotypes he sees on tv or in movies thinking he's being clever. Its not like some latina is walking around the nursing home calling him chica. Besides we all know lucas would blow his top if someone did that and he actually understood what they were implying by it

and I like how he's calling it a 'group home' again. Knowing full well its a literal nursing home full of sick low IQ people and seniors. Even he knows on some level that being in his 40s living in a nursing home is a bad look for him. Lucas sure is starting to go full senior though, eating the same food, spazzing out about not winning the hoodie on bingo night, sitting in the corner alone like a neglected 80 year old with no family as well no doubt

and lol at lucas thinking there is a subset of teens and 20 year olds that date exclusively older men without money being involved. Ones that aren't batshit mental and trying to get a guest spot on maury I mean

and lucas is more holier than thou than most christians with his own personal religion of telomeres and nobody should be allowed to fuck anyone but teen girls and only if you're 35 - 55 and anyone who doesn't help him do so is an agephobic bigot and greedy flatbill. Even the puritans weren't that oppressive. The only reason lucas isn't demanding the US abolish christmas at this point is because it would mean less money and gifts for him
 
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