Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

The I Scream Man said:
The second I heard “daddy daughter” and “age gap relationship” right next to each other I knew two things:

- first, that “age gap relationship” had always been a euphemism for pedophilia in Lucas, and
- second, that he’ll always be a goddamn pedo

In context this “daddy daughter” shit has always been the creepiest thing on the planet and Lucas inevitably always tells on himself like this

I feel like this video in particular is going to be a key milestone in Wernology for demonstrating these points, that he’s learned nothing and is still fundamentally the same stupid perverted asshole he’s always been
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The creeps on fetlife even saw this and called him out for it. Presumably because there are plenty of idiots like lucas who think in a similar way and show up there trying to pull the same shit. Its also why lucas got so surprised and angry when he was told by them that the daddy daughter thing wasn't supposed to be taken as literally or in the way lucas thought it was. Which was telling on himself in a big way. He thought he'd stumbled on a community of like minded daddy daughter pedos who would yeet him a bae and probably thought he was being particularly clever in having done so. Hell he thinks he's being clever by trying to hide his obvious and admitted pedo behavior behind the daddy daughter shit, as if he's the first predator to try that. He thinks that will fool people and the cops when if anything it only makes him look like more of a predator
 
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WonderWino said:
Give it time. Lucas always loses his shit and fucks up his housing sooner or later. Its only a matter of time


Clearly he got in some shit from making the videos in his room, probably overheard by his neighbors and got a few complaints so he's going outside to ree without them hearing it. Not that it'll stop him from doing it at mallon place for very long

Also when you're with your girl whether shes in a relationship with you or not

Nigger what? If shes not in a relationship with you she is by definition not your girl. This is looney predatory rapist talk. So is practically in a relationship with her. and way to take a womans agency away by claiming and she'll just follow the bullshit because they'll run their game. and what the fuck?! they'll steal your chick because the modern woman has no accountability

Dumbshit is just asking for a beat down and a pepper spraying if anybody out there hears him talking like that in public

He also bs'd about his job search when asked about it in the comments of the latest video:

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Ah...you're...."exploring various options" re work....Of course you are. I mean, when you have such a great track record and resume it can be tough to narrow down the incredible breadth of opportunities that you have. Each one a sure fire pathway to wealth and poontang and so much so that it's hard to turn ANY of them down.

He's had one job (that wasn't an online scam) in what...15-20 years? His options are to go wherever place is so insanely desperate and will take him before they ultimately deep six him like every other job he's ever had. That's it.
 
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teleméres69 said:
No Lucas, the only thing women are going to call you is "fat", "old", "pedophile", "stinky", "loser", or "creep"
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That's because they're all bigoted ableist, racist, ageist, materialistic women who have been corrupted by Nazi alpha males. After Lucas drops the nuclear bomb on Japan to free leftist zoomer baes from their stockholm syndrome, they'll all flock right over to him.
 
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mothman96 said:
No you Creep -- The truth is we get you and know your social media is not standup comedy. Years of documented evidence show it is your despicable, deranged, predator self coming through. You are trying to cover up you're a complete psycho POS.

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Everyone cross “I’m doing stand up comedy” off their classic Wern bingo cards! What are we missing now? Obviously a classic screech of “gen zeeeeeeeee!” Claiming to be royalty, maybe, or something about an “inheritance”? Oh and obviously a “nigga” or two.
 
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In your case Mallon Creep -- anyone that sends a woman your way hates that woman and is wanting to throw her under the bus.

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mothman96 said:
In your case Mallon Creep -- anyone that sends a woman your way hates that woman and is wanting to throw her under the bus.

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Idk if it's irony of justice that best describes Lucas's situation. His concept of a friend is not only someone who actively seeks out women for Lucas, but also spit immaculate game for Lucas's benefit, whilst removing themselves from the equation. Not only will Lucas never find a woman, but he'll never find a male friend based on his own parameters.
 
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There it is, the "I was just doing stand-up. I'm not really a middle aged incel pedophile creep". Same shit he tried when he got evicted from the flophouse. I wonder if he got talked to for his antics. Either way, I'm looking forward to the cope he does for spending another Christmas alone
VoidFace said:
Everyone cross “I’m doing stand up comedy” off their classic Wern bingo cards! What are we missing now? Obviously a classic screech of “gen zeeeeeeeee!” Claiming to be royalty, maybe, or something about an “inheritance”? Oh and obviously a “nigga” or two.
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He's funny, but not in the way he wants. Maybe the guy/girl he keeps making videos of finally saw them and complained about his behavior. Must be weird having Lucas living in the same home as you and discovering there's 14 years of insane incel lore about him
Cheesegirl78 said:
Lucas isn't funny in the least, and someone must have told him to lay off making crazy videos or he is going to be homeless again.
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mothman96 said:
No you Creep -- The truth is we get you and know your social media is not standup comedy. Years of documented evidence show it is your despicable, deranged, predator self coming through. You are trying to cover up you're a complete psycho POS.

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Like clockwork lucas tries to run damage control cause he's worried that he'll get in trouble if mallon place finds out about his batshit ranting about multiple residents. Even lucas knows thats a big no no. The fact he's stupid enough to think his behavior somehow constitutes 'stand up comedy' shows how broke brained he is. He just makes himself sound like a particularly stupid predator trying to cover his ass (and badly at that) Exactly which part of suicide baiting until you got thrown into the psych ward for a forced evaluation was stand up comedy lucas? Which part about screeching about trump, pedos and this woman being a traitor? The only funny part of any of it is the fact that lucas actually thinks any of it will lead to him getting a woman. and the jokes on him on that one. We're all laughing at that one. Laughing like the laugh react emotes that anger him so much

I guess this means that jim carrey really did have the dedication to the role of lloyd to have himself locked up in the nuthouse for 20 years between films. All for the comedy, right lucas?

Also shows even more that he reads here and sees it getting pointed out that if any of his behavior is reported to mallon place it wouldn't end well for him

mothman96 said:
Everyone cross “I’m doing stand up comedy” off their classic Wern bingo cards! What are we missing now? Obviously a classic screech of “gen zeeeeeeeee!” Claiming to be royalty, maybe, or something about an “inheritance”? Oh and obviously a “nigga” or two.
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With his mothers poor health i'm surprised he isn't reeeing more about inheriting something. Not that he'll get much and whatever he does get will be put behind some kind of trust for retards to provide for his necessities so he couldn't use it as date bait or blow it on clinkerdaggers in a week

I wonder if he'll try to serenade his obsession and give us an updated version of his broker b schizo song. You know, the money gets the honey.....bernie sanders is a socialist, your savior is a socialist, you are a socialist, I am a socialist, we are all socialists lunacy as he's waddling down the street in the middle of the night
 
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Blasterisk said:
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I gotta say I agree, he should.
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Sugar daddy dating sites must infuriate lucas. I wonder if he tried any, thinking he could offer his steak monthly steak dinner and $1000 for a date only to get banned like every other site he's every tried. Wouldn't surprise me

and lucas is the last person who should be demanding other people get a job. Funny, I don't see him waddling down to spokanes mcdonalds to get a job as a fry cook, the one thing he has actual experience in and might actually get hired for. Hell he's too lazy and entitled to even panhandle or collect bottles for money
 
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WonderWino said:
Sugar daddy dating sites must infuriate lucas. I wonder if he tried any, thinking he could offer his steak monthly steak dinner and $1000 for a date only to get banned like every other site he's every tried. Wouldn't surprise me
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Pretty sure those cost money to send messages. I'd lol for him to spend money to chat with a bot and get his hopes up. He already assumes all the bots on Tinder that send a message, then ghost him, are real. So I can only imagine how that episode would go.
WonderWino said:
and lucas is the last person who should be demanding other people get a job. Funny, I don't see him waddling down to spokanes mcdonalds to get a job as a fry cook, the one thing he has actual experience in and might actually get hired for. Hell he's too lazy and entitled to even panhandle or collect bottles for money
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This is the shit that shifts Lucas from "insane schizo incel" territory into "there's something legitimately wrong with how his brain works". He'll moorage about capitalism and materialism one moment, then tell women to get jobs and brag $100 steaks the next. All the while never having held a job, outside of the short stint at Walmart. His neurons are broken.
 
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mothman96 said:
No you Creep -- The truth is we get you and know your social media is not standup comedy. Years of documented evidence show it is your despicable, deranged, predator self coming through. You are trying to cover up you're a complete psycho POS.

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This means the cow must be getting blowback from his autistic rants that he has put on video. He thinks claiming he is being a comedian excuses it.

Russell Greer likes to do the same thing when he gets flack for his autistic rants and antics and says that he was being a "shock jock". They both then think you should "moooove on". A couple of lolcows those two are.

It's not comedy or being a shock jock, it's who these two exceptional individuals are.
 
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Wow, so much to catch up on, but I think as a Christmas miracle, I'll be short in my post. Lucas is about to be homeless, or a ward of the state. Santa is real, god made him Lucas and he's rewarding us with your suffering.

Maybe I'll chug a nice glass of scotch that's worth more than half a year of Lucas allowance and ramble later on but this is SUPER Wern content. I hope someone's saving these for when he's dead/locked up.

Lastly, after the King Roy post, I'd like to say, I'm sorry I called you poor King Roy, I was mostly tormenting your freak disowned spawn since he reads here and thinks he's getting all your shit when you pass on. You worked as a public servant for years and deserve your little elk kingdom even if those aren't your elk.
 
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