Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[mothman96]

More of the same, though I wonder who was off camera that he said something to at the beginning of the video:

Right at the beginning someone must have said something to him and he replied back. He doesn't look happy about what was said and continues to talk for a bit behind the sheet of paper.

 

[HackerX]

More of the same, though I wonder who was off camera that he said something to at the beginning of the video:

Man with highly defective sperm writing shizofrenic diatribe on the back of a completed word search. How wet are all the women getting from this?

 

[WonderWino]

Man with highly defective sperm writing shizofrenic diatribe on the back of a completed word search. How wet are all the women getting from this?

Oh they get wet. Lucas talking like this gets the zoomer baes absolutely drenched

.....from all the tears they produce while laughing at how pathetic and creepy lucas is and how he's never going to get anywhere near a zoomer bae, let alone while ranting like that

 

[mothman96]

Next up:

"Can Men Still Be Cheeky"

 

[HackerX]

Next up:

"Can Men Still Be Cheeky"
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I like how his thumb is stained from the sharpie. I do not like how we're not using word searches or crossword puzzles anymore. I also do not like how his wrist goes limp after he does his weird seductive stare into the camera. He needs to go ahead and admit he's gay.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Luke’s newest YouTube short is full of Wern classics
Opens with Luke dead-eyed staring in to your soul:

Then he gives us a look at the back of his head with a sassy hair flip. What little hair he has left is stringy, greasy from clearly not being washed in weeks, and rapidly disappearing (lol OLD Luke):

Gross. Then he shakily holds up his latest Creeper Sign:

And closes it out by pulling what I’m sure he believes is a thoughtful face, whereas he just ends up looking like a constipated, fat bulldog:

The end. Have a nice night in your nursing home, Luke! Take a shower!

 

[Bassomatic]

Oh Lordy I wa hoping we'd hear from Herr Werner Aryan uber Baron again.

We now have absolute proof King Roy reads Lucas stuff. I legitimately can't think of a better way to lose anything from them then bragging what you'll take when they die.

A trust fund is possible but I highly doubt it for two reasons one they are revokable. Secondly if the had one when baby retard was around they could have spent it or closed it seeing who Lucas really is. While I am in finserv my specialty isn't trusts but I know passing information. Being it would be for care, they could have pulled and put him into a private loony bin for better care housing during hobo sagas etc. Now for there's a possibility there's one sitting and if so he's got a payee. I highly guess Lucas was told you'll be ok when we die IE he's staying on Medicaid SSI and rewrote it to he's heir to the family fortune.

I'd love that he's got 20k coming and it's to be doled out to Mallon. He'd be so angry.

I think King Roy is much better off fiscally and he's middle class. He was a life long public servant he put his time in gets his pension and SS. We don't know much about him or his wife because he's smart enough to not post online regarding his bovine son. Perhaps he has more than we know but from what we've seen and Lucas word he's comfortable not rich.

We've seen the Zillows Myrna and Larry move a lot and don't make any money on these houses cheap small ones. That speaks a lot to me. Both on overall wealth and financial motivation and understanding.

Didn't Lucas see that new study zoomie and alpha kids think you need 500k a year to be middle class? Two years middle class salary isn't what I'd call right rich. He has no clue with money. Thanks to housing costs and inflation a million isn't a lot. People Lucas age should have about,2.5 mm to retire. At Lucas age he should be a millionaire already to meet middle class retirement goals. 13 dollars a month if he saved it all he could be where he should be in 6100+ years. Lmao. Almost 15000 years for 2.5.

I'll actually go out and beg all of you to look into saving more for that day. You won't think of the off brand cheezits you ate 25 years ago when you're sleeping in not punching a time clock at 70.

But back to it it's hard to say medical costs kill a lot of savvy investor when it comes to the end. I did know a guy who was retired 20+ years died noticably wealthier but he kept busy on cheap home paid for and dropped dead. That's rare tho. As I said a million isn't much anymore. I know for a fact there are millionaires in this very thread Lucas. Still have to go to work still have to wash their own clothes still need to chop their own veggies etc. They worked hard for it and don't want to squander it early.

It's also funny Lucas who hates women and talks down to them so much feels they can be smart enough to wait for his money. When we've seen him on his covid checks and tugboat. Lucas would fail the marshmallow test at his current age let alone as a kid.

A quick note notice Lucas has had pizza hut mentioned a few times? I'd bet that's Myrna's yearly "I'm a good mommy" tax for Lucas. That pizza hut goat video has to be theost cringe he's ever done. A guy who eats literal trash pretending to be a pizza snob? You're not Dave Portnoy. Also if you don't like it why did you buy it? We all know why.

I'm really enjoying his unhinged behavior. This does feel like a greatest hits album.

His tard rages must be bad when he's not filming because he's back to notes can't make too much noise in Mallon.

Also is it just me or more I look more I think those head phones are actually ear muffs? Could be shape but they seriously look it to me. If so that's funny AF.

God Lucas has a sexuality that would make Ed Gein blush. What's so crazy to me he's a basic faggot. In sexual terms. He does not like his homosexuality and has replaced it with something much darker. Lucas as a glory hole chaser is still 500x more socially acceptable than his rage towards women put into child rape fantasy. He's always hated gays because he is one and the voices in the wind tell him that. Even in his lifetime while views on homosexuality have loosened esp in a progressive area like WA state a lot of gays feel self loathing.

Suzanne was just a meal ticket to him and a beard. But more so a roof over the head. Lucas won't troon out because he's so "macho" in his mind but he sure seems to be the kinda guy who would.

This science shit is the best schizo we've seen from the cow. Remember how he invented light speed before by using a very well known debunk idea? Lmao. Love the ayyy lamo rambling definitely the kinda shit Art Bell would laugh at and ask you to see a shrink.

His eating is so repulsive an we know for him it's a mating gesture like a peacock spreading his feathers. Utterly disgusting and hilarious. He really thinks girls will be impressed he has 3 hours and a cot plus what he steal from pantries. It does look like a ramen brick. Big spending Wern from 100 steaks to 25 cent noodles . On my way from work to home I found more money than that. I'm sure girls did too. No one needs Lucas pantry scores. If you're that hard up you can go to a pantry and be fed and not need Lucas. I get a free drink often when I take clients to a restaurant I frequent. I look baller and they like to hook me up for bringing so many people. Lucas thinks him getting food from a church is the same baller flex. I don't know I've been on this thread since page one and in still often taken back how broken brain he is.

Lastly in regards to the notes. I'm sure he's too dumb to figure an overlay out but I also assume it's therapeutic to him to write this shit out. (Shit used literally and figuratively) Kinda like how he quiets the voices in the wind he probably feels good like he's drafting a thesis and hopes these will be seen after his death like a newly unearthed Newton or Shakespeare.

God he's so miserable and misshapen. That bald spot is peak kino.

 

[NoosJunki]

The dragonalls then levitate and fly off in 7 directions in the sky as Luke is howling in agony, suicide baiting. Then someone calls the crazy wagon on him and they haul him off to an asylum for life.

Got MY wish granted and I didn't even have to find some dragon's balls or something

 

[HackerX]

Lucas would fail the marshmallow test at his current age let alone as a kid.

I have my doubts he could pass the mirror test at his current age.

Suzanne was just a meal ticket to him and a beard.

I've always wondered how much she altered his trajectory, if at all. In one aspect, it gave him a taste of a relationship, whatever that means in this context. In another, I don't think he remembers much of anything from that period outside of it being 14 years ago. He remembers the "14 years ago" part really well.

 

[Bassomatic]

I have my doubts he could pass the mirror test at his current age.

I've always wondered how much she altered his trajectory, if at all. In one aspect, it gave him a taste of a relationship, whatever that means in this context. In another, I don't think he remembers much of anything from that period outside of it being 14 years ago. He remembers the "14 years ago" part really well.

Wow, that's a great question. Seriously, we know Lucas got away with murder with her. I think he was always so broken he could not manage a relationship in a healthy way but he got as other incels call "a fuck mommy" (aside they probably never had sex) he had another female provider.

In his most basic, he's a very lonely weirdo freak. I'm sure he still is angry towards her "abandoning him" much like when he drops the "best son" mask and chews out Mryna the window licker.

I think all of us remember those first night hitting a pillow in an empty bed after a serious relationship. He's still there a decade and a half later. That "I'll never replace her" feeling, is with him because deep down he knows it's true. He ruined it. He will never have (and hasn't) had stable housing since then, really the most interaction he's had is us dunking on the freak.

Suzanne has been smart to not get lured into the Wernoverse, and I hope no one reaches out to her. I'm sure she's got a tough enough life as is. I mean picture you being so lonely you let Lucas in your life, or so mentally ill, you feel pity for him.

I know I've stated many times but even at his best and he's clearly far from anymore, he's too greedy and sick to understand what normal dynamics are. It's transactional and he feels worth most of the pie so to speak.

I know some people whom have been in abusive relationships and while moving on many still talk about a wound that's tucked away. Lucas was the abuser, I wonder in a morbid way what damage being able and willing to hurt someone and losing that.

Lastly and very importantly, remember Lucas is FAT. If I wasn't half asleep I'd probably try to think or say more but seriously that's a wild ass question and great one about what effect she's had. I do think for sure she being his only helped spawn the 6 other made up girl friends. He's very egotistical, and one GF wasn't enough to sound experienced or cool to him.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

Sort of unrelated to the current events, but I still really like this one from a few months back that's on the channel.

This is the one where the sperg asserts, with desperate confidence, that he and gen Z spokaner chicks (in the 18-25 range) have a lot in common.
Do you like mouth watering steak on the menu that costs maybe upwards of $100? Have you seen those crab legs that are like 135? Seafood tower, 150, that might be pretty good. They've got Ossubocu, chicken...they've got soups and salads, they have all different cuts of steak...oh I think we have a lot in common, childen.

It's incredible, trying to figure out what a modern college age female might be into, his mind exclusively conjures stereotypical foods for middle aged men.

I like it because it so clearly demonstrates the irony that this asshole is middle aged, he's as out of touch as an 80 year old, but only wants to get with teenagers.

It also demonstrates a critical error in the wern psychology: he attempts to flex by offering overpriced foods, not understanding that that only works (and not even well) if you have everything else in your life covered.
If you are a homeless man living off benefits and tell people about buying $150 dishes, it instead demonstrates that you are broke not because of misfortune, or an appreciation for austere living, but rather because you are a reprehensible, wasteful dimwit.

If he was not retarded, he'd understand that if you're broke but trying to look good, you would want to brag online about how little you spend to be fulfilled, and how you're so clever you manage to eat like a king for like $7.

He is so desperate to convince young women that they're kindred spirits, despite the fact he's even more fucking clueless, doddery, and un-hip than even the average man his age.

 

[WonderWino]

The way he talks is so unnatural and bizarre. Shall we fetch a tasty sip sounds like something a parody of a british guy would say, or some mr handy in fallout. Lucas really does act like a literal alien trying to understand and interact with humans

His choice of music is creepy again. No lucas, tequila won't be making any womans clothes fall off for you. Its definitely not in the cards

 

[HackerX]

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The way he talks is so unnatural and bizarre. Shall we fetch a tasty sip sounds like something a parody of a british guy would say, or some mr handy in fallout. Lucas really does act like a literal alien trying to understand and interact with humans

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His choice of music is creepy again. No lucas, tequila won't be making any womans clothes fall off for you. Its definitely not in the cards

You forgot the best part.

The babes will definitely get hot and bothered by a sped using a children's crossword puzzle as a canvas for his ramblings. The retard also needed multiple attempts to rip the paper in half. His motor skills are putting on a show during this clip.

 

[Disgruntled Pupper]

At this point I'm wondering if he's already been kicked out of Malon, or just ran away. He's obviously not taking his pyche meds and wherever he's hanging out he's always in his coat and beanie, day and night. When or if he runs out of his diabetes/heart/whatever else meds I think he'll crash pretty quickly and end up back in the hospital.

 

[mothman96]

At this point I'm wondering if he's already been kicked out of Malon, or just ran away. He's obviously not taking his pyche meds and wherever he's hanging out he's always in his coat and beanie, day and night. When or if he runs out of his diabetes/heart/whatever else meds I think he'll crash pretty quickly and end up back in the hospital.

I'd say he is still at Mallon. If at some pt he does get booted from Mallon he'd probably head to House of Charity. HOC is low barrier so even though he's been banned from there several times they would accept him back.

 

[Broadside]

At this point I'm wondering if he's already been kicked out of Malon, or just ran away. He's obviously not taking his pyche meds and wherever he's hanging out he's always in his coat and beanie, day and night. When or if he runs out of his diabetes/heart/whatever else meds I think he'll crash pretty quickly and end up back in the hospital.

Where would he be staying though? I'm under the impression he probably just bolts Mallon for the day because his sped love interest and her man hang around all day. Maybe he's at the library?

 

[Kingfisher9000]

Sort of unrelated to the current events, but I still really like this one from a few months back that's on the channel.

This is the one where the sperg asserts, with desperate confidence, that he and gen Z spokaner chicks (in the 18-25 range) have a lot in common.
Do you like mouth watering steak on the menu that costs maybe upwards of $100? Have you seen those crab legs that are like 135? Seafood tower, 150, that might be pretty good. They've got Ossubocu, chicken...they've got soups and salads, they have all different cuts of steak...oh I think we have a lot in common, childen.

It's incredible, trying to figure out what a modern college age female might be into, his mind exclusively conjures stereotypical foods for middle aged men.

I like it because it so clearly demonstrates the irony that this asshole is middle aged, he's as out of touch as an 80 year old, but only wants to get with teenagers.

It also demonstrates a critical error in the wern psychology: he attempts to flex by offering overpriced foods, not understanding that that only works (and not even well) if you have everything else in your life covered.
If you are a homeless man living off benefits and tell people about buying $150 dishes, it instead demonstrates that you are broke not because of misfortune, or an appreciation for austere living, but rather because you are a reprehensible, wasteful dimwit.

If he was not retarded, he'd understand that if you're broke but trying to look good, you would want to brag online about how little you spend to be fulfilled, and how you're so clever you manage to eat like a king for like $7.

He is so desperate to convince young women that they're kindred spirits, despite the fact he's even more fucking clueless, doddery, and un-hip than even the average man his age.

My favorite part of the “$100 steak” series of videos is how he was clearly talking about a specific restaurant, but never once said its name.

 

[mothman96]

At this point I'm wondering if he's already been kicked out of Malon, or just ran away. He's obviously not taking his pyche meds and wherever he's hanging out he's always in his coat and beanie, day and night. When or if he runs out of his diabetes/heart/whatever else meds I think he'll crash pretty quickly and end up back in the hospital.

Where would he be staying though? I'm under the impression he probably just bolts Mallon for the day because his sped love interest and her man hang around all day. Maybe he's at the library?

His is making the videos inside Mallon Place.

This pic of Jesus is in a current video "There Was Nothing But Time":

Here is the same pic inside Mallon months back:

 

[NoosJunki]

Sort of unrelated to the current events, but I still really like this one from a few months back that's on the channel.

This is the one where the sperg asserts, with desperate confidence, that he and gen Z spokaner chicks (in the 18-25 range) have a lot in common.
Do you like mouth watering steak on the menu that costs maybe upwards of $100? Have you seen those crab legs that are like 135? Seafood tower, 150, that might be pretty good. They've got Ossubocu, chicken...they've got soups and salads, they have all different cuts of steak...oh I think we have a lot in common, childen.

It's incredible, trying to figure out what a modern college age female might be into, his mind exclusively conjures stereotypical foods for middle aged men.

I like it because it so clearly demonstrates the irony that this asshole is middle aged, he's as out of touch as an 80 year old, but only wants to get with teenagers.

It also demonstrates a critical error in the wern psychology: he attempts to flex by offering overpriced foods, not understanding that that only works (and not even well) if you have everything else in your life covered.
If you are a homeless man living off benefits and tell people about buying $150 dishes, it instead demonstrates that you are broke not because of misfortune, or an appreciation for austere living, but rather because you are a reprehensible, wasteful dimwit.

If he was not retarded, he'd understand that if you're broke but trying to look good, you would want to brag online about how little you spend to be fulfilled, and how you're so clever you manage to eat like a king for like $7.

He is so desperate to convince young women that they're kindred spirits, despite the fact he's even more fucking clueless, doddery, and un-hip than even the average man his age.

Baby girl do you like crab
I'm the coolest crab u know, baby
You want crab? I can get you crab. That's what you all are into nowadays, right?

Edit: literally an irl schizo goblin man like Charlie Kelly from It's Always Sunny. I hadn't made that connection until now

 

[HackerX]

Well... Do you?

Edit: Another upload

This one is deeply unnerving. The bumcel's dead eyes staring into the camera while holding up his feeble attempt to capture a boyfriend-free socialist zoomer for anal fisting. He seems so defeated, yet he'll never go give up his lovequest. The fact this is one thirst that'll never be quenched is known to everyone but the subject.

Second edit: Another clip

Any theories on why he didn't spell out alcohol? Only thing I've got is he didn't know how to spell it. If he were smarter, I'd have guessed it was to avoid algorithm shenanigans on YouTube, but that doesn't make a whole lot of sense in the first place.

Did he pierce his ears at some point?