Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Fatal Walter]

I feel like DARE could use that video. "Oh, don't smoke pot or you might end up like Lucas."

I might be showing my age. They probably don't even have DARE anymore but this could definitely be used in a PSA about drugs.

Edit: Wow, this video is the gift that keeps on giving. He still wants to make all drugs legal? After making such a big deal out of his neighbors? That's laughable. Lucas is trying to seem so against anything that's illegal and so for anything that is legal. So he's trying to normalize the behavior so he can take advantage of the age of consent. The supposed age of consent, of course. He's still wrong about it.

 

[Rescuetoast]

I feel like DARE could use that video. "Oh, don't smoke pot or you might end up like Lucas."

I might be showing my age. They probably don't even have DARE anymore but this could definitely be used in a PSA about drugs.

Edit: Wow, this video is the gift that keeps on giving. He still wants to make all drugs legal? After making such a big deal out of his neighbors? That's laughable. Lucas is trying to seem so against anything that's illegal and so for anything that is legal. So he's trying to normalize the behavior so he can take advantage of the age of consent. The supposed age of consent, of course. He's still wrong about it.

Off topic but no, they don’t have DARE anymore, largely because it increased drug use. I just think it’s funny. Perhaps we should not have told fifth graders that hallucinogens exist?

 

[The Original DEP]

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Off topic but no, they don’t have DARE anymore, largely because it increased drug use. I just think it’s funny. Perhaps we should not have told fifth graders that hallucinogens exist?

First post, read through everything and wow, just, anyway. DARE does still exist. I do live in a small town, so it may not be everywhere, but my son's school has a DARE officier.

Also this was posted on Cracked today, thought Lucas would find it informative.

 

[Rescuetoast]

View attachment 1316466

First post, read through everything and wow, just, anyway. DARE does still exist. I do live in a small town, so it may not be everywhere, but my son's school has a DARE officier.

Also this was posted on Cracked today, thought Lucas would find it informative.
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Weird, they phased it out in my state because it didn’t work at all lol

 

[Coach McGuirk]

Some of Lucas' posts are creepier than silent hill descriptions, his escapades are definitely worth achieving

 

[wenttobermuda]

View attachment 1328836

What a cursed selfie, and exhibit of his lack of self awareness.

Lucas's beard is headed in a silly direction. His chin hairs are longer than his penis.

I suppose its difficult for lazy, schizo bums to shave regularly. But a fellow with his level of hygiene may find a long beard difficult to pull off. Even if it does cover up some of his ugly mug.

 

[Wernology]

Some of Lucas' posts are creepier than silent hill descriptions, his escapades are definitely worth achieving
View attachment 1328836

Love how he not only blurred his skin (anyone who's seen his videos knows THAT picture is a lie) and part of his facial hair, but also one of his entire eyes.

Facetune isn't that fucking hard to learn, Lucas.

Goddamn.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Lucas looks worse with no eyebrows, although it may be because I think it's synonymous with being really really fat thanks to other lolcows.

 

[teleméres69]

Airbrushing doesn't make him look any less of a creep, though it's pointless to do beyond his fragile ego since everyone knows he has the complexion of a 60+ year old

Some of Lucas' posts are creepier than silent hill descriptions, his escapades are definitely worth achieving
View attachment 1328836

It's a good thing Lucas can't photoshop his photos properly, it's more funny when he has to show what he really looks like

Love how he not only blurred his skin (anyone who's seen his videos knows THAT picture is a lie) and part of his facial hair, but also one of his entire eyes.

Facetune isn't that fucking hard to learn, Lucas.

Goddamn.

 

[Krathnami]

Here’s a much more honest selfie of Lucas

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

Headphone warning for the first part and a few other random parts, he's outside and shouting over traffic in a few bits.

Edit: Watching him tear apart that burrito and eat it with his hand while treating the sauce like shots at a bar...fucking hell.

The utter disgust I had watching the part of the video where Lucas is eating that burrito almost made me forget how incredibly stupid his political rantings were earlier on (especially the “everyone from a CEO to a restaurant worker makes the same wage” bit.) The smacking of the lips, the chewing sounds, seeing him eat the filling off that dirty tray with his fingers... all the while reminding the ladies that this is the quality of life they could be enjoying with him viscerally repulsed me to the point I felt a little queasy.

And wtf was he trying to say through the haze of his pot addled brain at the end when talking about his board game? Something like “Everybody working on it can’t know anybody else, but that‘s fine because I am the only one working on this project.”

Wut?

 

[dingobaby]

"my dick right in

Some of Lucas' posts are creepier than silent hill descriptions, his escapades are definitely worth achieving
View attachment 1328836

The way Lucas looks at young men as miserly hoarders of fertile women is cuckaroo.

Gen Z Flatbill: Ay, extra bae, I gotta stop cockblocking my elders, how does a nice meal sound to you?
Gen Z Bae: Yeet me the fuck out of here!
Gen Z Flatbill: Bitch I can't be an agephobe anymore and I need a hundred dollars. Let me tell you about the potential of his balls and DNA

 

[PrincessKidana]

View attachment 1329199Here’s a much more honest selfie of Lucas

That is absolutely nightmare inspiring.

 

[WonderWino]

That is absolutely nightmare inspiring.

For some reason that pic reminds me of this:

I can totally see lucas's morning routine being eerily similar

 

[Mertor]

"my dick right in

The way Lucas looks at young men as miserly hoarders of fertile women is cuckaroo.

Gen Z Flatbill: Ay, extra bae, I gotta stop cockblocking my elders, how does a nice meal sound to you?
Gen Z Bae: Yeet me the fuck out of here!
Gen Z Flatbill: Bitch I can't be an agephobe anymore and I need a hundred dollars. Let me tell you about the potential of his balls and DNA

Does he honestly believe, that $100 is a lot of money for a nice dinner for two? XD It baffles me.

 

[dirtydeanna96]

1 BTC per person per year, Lucas says.
That is $9,381
The federal poverty level is $12,760

 

[Wernology]

1 BTC per person per year, Lucas says.
That is $9,381
The federal poverty level is $12,760

Makes sense though.
When he says he wants people to all be equal, he means equal to him.
If everyone were equal to him, he'd be a default desirable person to "the honies", after all.

And his poor ass is well below the federal poverty level.

 

[WonderWino]

Does he honestly believe, that $100 is a lot of money for a nice dinner for two? XD It baffles me.

Its not surprising when you think about it. Lucas has a childs understanding of money because he has no understanding of its real value because he has never really had to earn it himself in any significant way.

To put it simply, his understanding of what constitutes a large amount of money and being a big spender the same way a child does when they get money from their parents for their birthday or christmas. Consider how a child that gets $100 from a relative for christmas sees that kind of money as a ten year old. Its a huge sum to a kid. Now consider that same $100 as a 25 year old and a 45 year old. Its nothing. Its what you spend on a decent trip to the movies, a decent meal at a good steakhouse or buying the deluxe edition of a new game on steam. Most people don't consider it to be that much money. But to lucas? He's thinking about how he can act like hes super rich and eat out every single week and how you can too if you just date him. Just look at how he talks about that wrap he tore apart on camera - he was whining about how he usually gets the one with sour cream but 'didn't have enough money' for that one...only to mention shortly after that its only like $1 more than what he spent on what he bought. He said it like it was a huge deal. Hell just look at what he considers the best food in spokane. Its barely a step above mcdonalds and in some cases i'd argue the mcdonalds would probably be better quality, like with that shitty wrap

I mean really, this is a guy who brags about having an EBT card like he's a billionaire talking about his black american express card

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

$100 is a lot when you're getting roughly ~$650/month, and you're legally not allowed to ever have more than $2000 of assets at any time.

 

[GoutfootHorseface]

Lucas is on a upload spree, 6 videos over the past hour or so, all on the same tired theme but all of them include him screaming (to the point it distorts the audio) the word greed over and over again on the streets of Spokane.