Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[LeeLoo]

I think one of the other hobos stole it because they probably don't like him. It will be funny if they keep stealing them. Also couldn't he use that Gameboy to play music? (sorry Im a boomer and never owned a Gameboy that wasn't black n white)

It would be sweet justice if the fat fuck was pushed out of HOC by the others. I hope they keep stealing all his handouts, eventually driving the vile sack of shit to an epic meltdown.

 

[Da Dude123]

As we all know, Lucas does not drink coffee he drinks "hot cocoa", like a child. The pussy can't handle coffee.

Doing a daily update. He is still at HOC, and came out of Brew Brothers this morning getting a coffee and he was walking near the buses. No earbuds or phone which is evidence that he got his phone jacked or lost it. Every time I have had a Lucas sighting previously downtown or when he in or around the shelter, that phone is all he is focusing on.

 

[Nobleman]

As we all know, Lucas does not drink coffee he drinks "hot cocoa", like a child. The pussy can't handle coffee.

Lol my bad. I phrased that wrong, I WAS coming out of Brew Bros with the coffee. We all know of us Lucas’s infantile obsession with sweets, hot chocolate at Starbucks, mixed sody pops at McDonald’s.

 

[WonderWino]

Lol my bad. I phrased that wrong, I WAS coming out of Brew Bros with the coffee. We all know of us Lucas’s infantile obsession with sweets, hot chocolate at Starbucks, mixed sody pops at McDonald’s.

On that note, when I was a kid there was a guy in one of my elementary school classes that used to do the same thing at birthday parties and mix all the soda flavors together. Everybody used to refer to it as drinking swamp water. Namely because oddly enough they had tonic water included for some reason

It describes the kind of things lucas drinks to a T

 

[Rescuetoast]

On that note, when I was a kid there was a guy in one of my elementary school classes that used to do the same thing at birthday parties and mix all the soda flavors together. Everybody used to refer to it as drinking swamp water. Namely because oddly enough they had tonic water included for some reason

It describes the kind of things lucas drinks to a T

Everybody I knew called it a suicide when you mixed all the sodas, which is actually exactly what it is when you’re 40 years old and homeless with untreated diabetes.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

I assume his DS didn't last more than a day or two either. Poor Lucas. This is why you shut up and keep an apartment.

As we all know, Lucas does not drink coffee he drinks "hot cocoa", like a child. The pussy can't handle coffee.

Sodie pop is his excuse for terrifying the last and only girlfriend he ever had so he can't handle that either.

 

[LeeLoo]

Everybody I knew called it a suicide when you mixed all the sodas, which is actually exactly what it is when you’re 40 years old and homeless with untreated diabetes.

Does anyone remember late last year when he posted all his birthday celebration meals? He bragged about walking 3 miles to IHOP to get dulce de leche pancakes...smothered in whipped cream....and EVERY kind of syrup. Disgusting glutinous beast. He’s so fucking greedy he can’t have one thing; he has to have a little of everything.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Does anyone remember late last year when he posted all his birthday celebration meals? He bragged about walking 3 miles to IHOP to get dulce de leche pancakes...smothered in whipped cream....and EVERY kind of syrup. Disgusting glutinous beast. He’s so fucking greedy he can’t have one thing; he has to have a little of everything.

A LITTLE of everything?

I think you mean a LOT of every thing.

Lucas goes back for seconds and thirds.

When someone in his apartment building left some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in the entry way for people to take one each, Lucas bragged about taking eight.

So did he lose the DS too? If so, looks like Goldy lost his "gentlemen's" bet.

 

[Fatal Walter]

Oh shit, we're talking about Lucas being a glutton?
This is that one time he bought 40$ of Taco Bell. 8 Chalupas.
Bonus misuse of the word canard.

 

[Trainwreck]

@fatalwalter I passed through Aberdeen today on my way to vacation. Have you ever gotten bored enough to try and figure out where lucas /myrna/Roy lived at back in the day?

 

[Club Sandwich]

Oh shit, we're talking about Lucas being a glutton?

EBT revenue at most retail outlets (such as Taco Bell) is usually a loss that is made up for in net income adjustment either at month end, quarterly, or annually (depending on how they do their taxes). the government doesn't "double-dip" themselves and both pay Lucas' disability income and simultaneously gives a bonus of some sort to Taco Bell.

as a business owner that accepts EBT, here's some insight into what happens:

1. taxes from multiple sources are collected by the treasury department and input into a variety of accounts determined by legislation. these account are then administrated for disbursement by an agency (like the SSA) to individuals via various means. one of those means is a variation on the debit card, called EBT.

2. the recipient spends the funds from welfare via EBT at participating businesses. businesses are not required to accept welfare (outside of certain ones like fuel or groceries), but instead must actively apply for a permit to participate in the program(s).

3. during the transaction, the retailer has to determine if the items purchased on EBT are part of any specific programs like SNAP or WIC or something. the retailer would have paid for training employees and setting up systems that help determine this, however if the retailer gets it wrong, then the "virtual voucher" is denied and the retailer loses out on both the item and the payment. this is because the payment doesn't actually get approved until you batch submit the "virtual vouchers" electronically. it's not done at the point of sale. the POS only checks if the EBT account is valid and has appropriate funds and if so, will approve the transaction. typically POS software will have an internal list of SKU's that are qualified for various programs and vouchers and it'll do some "lining up" to ensure that the purchased item matches.

people that have worked grocery stores that deal with WIC purchases will know how specific the vouchers/coupons are and the special transaction procedure needed to carry them out. doing it improperly can result in denying the food item, the retailer not being reimbursed for the item via the voucher because it's invalid or something, et c.

4. at this point the business has spent time/money in training, setting up equipment to process EBT stuff, having to set up some new accounts in the ledger and specifically separate EBT transactions from the GL and other things because it has many special rules. the EBT sale is typically a short term loss because the retailer isn't compensated for most items until month end or something or from the manufacturer of the product sold (in the case of, say, milk or cereal), and if they get money from this transaction, it's effectively the actual cost of goods sold and not a restock or replenish cost, or any indirect stuff like training or accounting fee increases. depending on the local economy, this might be a minor loss as well, if the cost of replacing the item is higher than the cost of selling it.

some states have tax breaks for certain types of businesses that accept EBT to discourage "food deserts" and other things, like a grocery stores in the ghetto. however often these are money pits due to other losses (vandalism, theft). a grocery in a more sustainable trailer park location where people are poor, but tend to not be a shrink/vandalism magnet would likely be profitable though, thanks to a tax break for employing people in a depressed area and accepting EBT in a food desert, and so on (varies by locality).

this was pretty rambling, but i hope it was useful in pointing out why Lucas is a moron.

i think he's conflating some companies getting tax breaks (meaning they have reduced tax liability, they don't get a check cut to them typically unless it's a refund owed on taxes already paid) with "welfare recipient spending money is good for the economy". welfare recipients spending money is good for the economy the same as any other spending, since it's the motion of money, the total moving volume of cash in the system, that allows everything to work.

when money isn't moving, it is losing value because there are no closed systems in modern economics besides direct bartering.

Spoiler: off-topic

this is also why stuffing a mattress with cash or letting it rot in a savings account is also losing you money - unless you are somehow offsetting the rate of inflation and the cost of ownership (maintaining an account, buying money-eating mouse repellent, et c) then the money loses value over time purely as a function of other people injecting time/money into your local economy (inflating it) and actively trading money around (increasing trade volume) both of which attract outside money (from the next town over or tourists or something) which increases the total amount of money in your local economy (devaluing all currency in the market). in the short term, the surplus is great for the locals, however devaluation naturally increases the costs of everything in the area, et c, et c.

 

[Wernology]

This morning, to nobody's surprise (apart from maybe Lucas'), a girlfriend is still not in the cards for him.

 

[Czolg]

Oh shit, we're talking about Lucas being a glutton?
View attachment 1447053 This is that one time he bought 40$ of Taco Bell. 8 Chalupas.
View attachment 1447057 Bonus misuse of the word canard.

Nothing attracts women like talking about shitting on the floor.

 

[Draxx them Sklounst]

Oh nooo, how is he gonna be on that really important podcast tomorrow?!

 

[pr3nt177]

View attachment 1447057

Food and shit in the same breath. Charming.

 

[Fatal Walter]

@fatalwalter I passed through Aberdeen today on my way to vacation. Have you ever gotten bored enough to try and figure out where lucas /myrna/Roy lived at back in the day?

The only thing I'd really be interested in is that property he keeps trying to claim is worth millions of dollars. I know that's not true because property here is really cheap but I'd like to see if it's really as glorious as he's made it out to be. It's a shame. Lucas is about 7 years older than I am. If it was 4 or less I'd probably be able to just make a facebook post asking about him and someone I know would probably remember. Then again, he probably didn't interact with people much back in school.

 

[BrightGold]

The only thing I'd really be interested in is that property he keeps trying to claim is worth millions of dollars. I know that's not true because property here is really cheap but I'd like to see if it's really as glorious as he's made it out to be. It's a shame. Lucas is about 7 years older than I am. If it was 4 or less I'd probably be able to just make a facebook post asking about him and someone I know would probably remember. Then again, he probably didn't interact with people much back in school.

Roy has posted at least a couple of pictures of the property on his Facebook and Instagram - even if no one's able to figure out where it is based on that, it might be interesting to give it a look-over and compare it to what you already know about property values in the area. I'm in Western WA too, but closer to the tech strongholds, so values are inflated over here.

ETA: I also think it's hilarious that Lucas thinks his parents are some fat cat millionaires because they had stock in Ocean Spray and Microsoft. Does he not realize most adults get some form of stock options, either through work or by maintaining even low-risk investment portfolios? It baffles me how truly ignorant he is about money in every way possible.

 

[Da Dude123]

I guess Lucas will have to wait for his first of the month check to buy a new phone to scream into if his is indeed lost or broken. I bet he is beside himself not being able to show the zoomer baes his Mexican restaurant dinners that he buys all the time. Wonder what kind of phone he had? You can get smart phones pretty cheap now and can find them for under $100. Fatty, of course, is not a thrifty person so he may not be able to.

Of course, his millionaire dad/king, Roy cannot help him. Lucas hasn't spoke to him in a year, but he is totally getting his money when he dies!

 

[WonderWino]

Nothing attracts women like talking about shitting on the floor.

I think we found the perfect zoomer for the wern

 

[Nobleman]

The only thing I'd really be interested in is that property he keeps trying to claim is worth millions of dollars. I know that's not true because property here is really cheap but I'd like to see if it's really as glorious as he's made it out to be. It's a shame. Lucas is about 7 years older than I am. If it was 4 or less I'd probably be able to just make a facebook post asking about him and someone I know would probably remember. Then again, he probably didn't interact with people much back in school.

It can't be true at all since Aberdeen and the surrounding area is a shithole. I mean Ocean Shores has its season during the summer, but for the rest of the year the entire region appears to be almost a third world country, so I can't imagine any land out there being worth millions.