Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[WonderWino]

This has been such an ugly spectacle. Highly watchable, of course.

This episode painfully illustrates that Lucas can not take care of himself. In case there was any doubt.

He lacks the basic life skills and judgment of an independent adult. Left to his own devices, he'll show up penniless in a strange city to meet a clumsy catfish. He's done this twice now.

Three times actually. Idaho, spokane and now LA

Apparently the third time is not a charm for lucas

Is this happening, or is she just making shit up?

I vote 'making shit up' like every other time shes made up stories about herself and coworkers being harassed by lucas at work.....despite the fact she lives on the other side of the country. She has also made statements much like that several times now and disappears whenever someone calls her on it

and surprise surprise, didn't I say dream catcher would be involved in this. I bloody well knew it

I'll feed you some info for kiwi because I don't want to get doxed or hear their shit about it

Maybe she should be hearing our shit about it and should be doxed for enabling a literal sexual predator and pedo to get away with no consequences for his actions. Might knock some sense into that idiot brain of hers. If what shes doing is such a good idea and not a stupid thing to do at all why is she so worried about getting shit for it or anybody finding out shes enabling a predator?

 

[mothman96]

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No no, the ticket is real!

So, is the ticket payer a Texas woman with children?

 

[Da Dude123]

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No no, the ticket is real!

Couldn't someone get him an Uber or
taxi to an airport? Or, somehow Lucas could get on a bus or some sort of transit to the airport? I would think that would still be cheaper then riding the dog all the way back to Spokane? It would take some logistics and communication with Lucas, which would be a challenge. But still, there are ways to get from downtown LA to an airport.

So, was it dreamchaser who bought him the bus ticket? Or who exactly was it? And why?

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

How a random mother from Texas finds out about Lucas Werner, and then somehow thinks to herself "I'll reach out to him and waste $250 on him." and knowing she'd get shit on for doing it is mind boggling. That money couldn't be better used on your kids, charity, anything else? I'm flummoxed.

 

[teleméres69]

He's not gonna stay in LA sadly. He'll run back to Spokane where he can be smelly and free to yell all the slurs he wants without looking over his shoulder. Kinda funny he admitted to not showering for weeks despite having access to with the shelters. He really is a crusty old pervert. Funny he mentions when he gets housing and a shower he'll look good enough to get women again, despite looking like a human marshmallow when living at Pioneer

This has been such an ugly spectacle. Highly watchable, of course.

This episode painfully illustrates that Lucas can not take care of himself. In case there was any doubt.

He lacks the basic life skills and judgment of an independent adult. Left to his own devices, he'll show up penniless in a strange city to meet a clumsy catfish. He's done this twice now.

Day to day, he cannot provide for his own needs. He cannot maintain housing, or stay out of trouble. He is always getting into conflict with the people around him and getting banned from places. Lucas is absolutely helpless. He is just savvy enough, and familiar enough with the social safety net in Spokane, to keep himself alive. But even then his existence is so precarious and miserable. He can't do any better.

What do you do with a Lucas Werner?

And now he's talking about staying in LA, because he feels "comfortable" there and is pleasantly surprised that it isn't like an 80's hair metal video. Because, you see, the media has represented to Lucas that LA, skidrow specifically, is like an all white 80's hair metal video. But it isn't. And Lucas is now an expert on the cultural vibrancy of urban LA.

Coming to LA was a terrible decision. Staying would also be a terrible decision. Not that he has much waiting for him back in Spokane.

Fascinating. Some of the best Lucas quotes in a long time.

To rape a teen girl*

The Spokane Freak is going to achieve his goal -- soon.

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Fuck you dude (not Goldaor), you know exactly what kind of monster you're enabling. You're not taking some moral high ground helping a pedophile. I hope people know you support people like this as an alleged parent, I sure as hell wouldn't trust you around any kids if you're comfortable with people like that. You want to feel good for the holiday? Actually donate to people who really need this money. This is why Lucas never learns, people like this jackass will always bail him out of dumb decisions

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No no, the ticket is real!

Guessing this person is shady themself and probably relates to Lucas being a fucked up monster on some level. I just don't see how anyone who's a parent would see Lucas and think that is a good investment unless they're the type to let their kids get molested

How a random mother from Texas finds out about Lucas Werner, and then somehow thinks to herself "I'll reach out to him and waste $250 on him." and knowing she'd get shit on for doing it is mind boggling. That money couldn't be better used on your kids, charity, anything else? I'm flummoxed.

 

[Nobleman]

Blast from the past. I think we all need to watch this and see how far we have came:

https://fb.watch/2ytTTP7E-9/

 

[cigarettesalsa]

Thread theme for tonight

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

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"..the best thing i've ever smelled aside from pizza cooking..."

Wow Lucas, truly a multi-faceted mind with many different experiences to relate to!

 

[Wernology]

Blast from the past. I think we all need to watch this and see how far we have came:

https://fb.watch/2ytTTP7E-9/

Holy fuck, thank you for posting that! I've only ever seen super low quality, short clips of it and somehow had never been able to find the whole Tosh.0 bit!

 

[VoidFace]

Fuck you dude (not Goldaor), you know exactly what kind of monster you're enabling. You're not taking some moral high ground helping a pedophile. I hope people know you support people like this as an alleged parent, I sure as hell wouldn't trust you around any kids if you're comfortable with people like that. You want to feel good for the holiday? Actually donate to people who really need this money. This is why Lucas never learns, people like this jackass will always bail him out of dumb decisions


Guessing this person is shady themself and probably relates to Lucas being a fucked up monster on some level. I just don't see how anyone who's a parent would see Lucas and think that is a good investment unless they're the type to let their kids get molested

I vote excommunication or banishment for the enabler, personally. Not only for ensuring Lucas doesn’t fucking learn, but for ruining a potentially incredible saga before it even begins.

Shame, enabler, shame.

 

[denysdemontfort]

I can't believe the "he can't get to the airport" excuse. There are several airports in Los Angeles and public transportation all over the place and cash wiring exists. The bus ticket enabler wasted a ton of money on this moron.

I hope Lucas gets kicked off the greyhound in Fresno.

 

[Jeremiah the Bullfrog]

I can't believe the "he can't get to the airport" excuse. There are several airports in Los Angeles and public transportation all over the place and cash wiring exists. The bus ticket enabler wasted a ton of money on this moron.

I hope Lucas gets kicked off the greyhound in Fresno.

You have him wait on a corner and send an Uber to him and drop him off at LAX (I don't the Ritz is all that far from LAX either).

This is just them fucking with him.

 

[wenttobermuda]

Three times actually. Idaho, spokane and now LA

I count the Couer d'Alene/Spokane episode as a single event. Lucas aimed for the former, ended up in the latter, and had many misadventures along the way. Including falling in love with catfish.

I wonder about the particulars of his move to Olympia (following Cyril and Michelle, I believe). Something tells me that there's a good story behind every change of scenery.

 

[Wernology]

You have him wait on a corner and send an Uber to him and drop him off at LAX (I don't the Ritz is all that far from LAX either).

This is just them fucking with him.

I feel bad for whoever gets stuck on that bus, driver included, with someone who freely admits they haven't slept in days or showered in weeks. Hopefully it'll be a mostly empty bus and he can sit in the back and not bother the bus driver.

Unrelated, but since he's currently stranded in LA, I figured now was a good time to get his cover of Welcome to the Jungle up on Youtube. This is AFTER lowering the volume by 15db and adjusting what I could adjust in the mixer of the editor and it's still ear bleeding level loud and tinny, so guard your ears and start with the volume damn near on mute.

 

[Jeremiah the Bullfrog]

I feel bad for whoever gets stuck on that bus, driver included, with someone who freely admits they haven't slept in days or showered in weeks. Hopefully it'll be a mostly empty bus and he can sit in the back and not bother the bus driver.

Unrelated, but since he's currently stranded in LA, I figured now was a good time to get his cover of Welcome to the Jungle up on Youtube. This is AFTER lowering the volume by 15db and adjusting what I could adjust in the mixer of the editor and it's still ear bleeding level loud and tinny, so guard your ears and start with the volume damn near on mute.

Where did you get this and why did he think this was a good idea to make it?

 

[Wernology]

Where did you get this and why did he think this was a good idea to make it?

There's a whole 'album' of either covers or songs he wrote (Teenage Bondage is...uh...well, it's called Teenage Bondage.): https://telomereking.bandcamp.com/releases

I had to download the whole horrific album to pick his Welcome to the Jungle cover out of the mix.

 

[boner_alert]

No, his goal is to marry a hot 18 year old, impregnate her, move back with King Roy in his millionaire mansion with tons of elk, and piss off his unapproving father-in-law that is Lucas' age or younger.

I'm being completely serious, I think the goal is assault a girl. I think he's sleep deprived, hangry, thirsty, frightened, and being forced to feel that sense of staggering shame and pain of having to be Lucas Werner and how the fuck he lives his life.. that he, as an astute kiwi (I'm blanking on who atm) speculated uses his mania and lunacy to distract himself from as much as possible

But now he's feeling it. And combined with a nearly decade long case of blue balls, he's starting to boil over.. his usual self soothing mechanisms of victimhood and entitlement of getting WHAT'S OWED TO HIM, A KINGLY KING, are working overdrive and I think he's hyped himself to decide to assault a young girl as soon as he sees one. He's saying as much at the end of that video where he will achieve his goal

Did the person who spent all that damn money to buy him a bus home not see that part of the video? How about this video like what the fuck?

Of course I don't want any harm to come to him but it's impossible to feel any sympathy, I'm almost feeling moti tbh. But it's just hard to stomach that this disgusting ticking time bomb of a mangy disease-ridden predator gets to spend all his days literally obsessing over and plotting ways to isolate underaged girls as he collects a monthly check (part of which he uses to buy alcohol and weed to lure teens), harasses every female in his vicinity (the hairdresser, the young homeless girls that Issac's kid brother felt he needed to protect from Lucas, shelter employees, etc), and make stupid decisions (/commit a crime) like this one and never experience any consequences. On top of that, he spit screams into the camera demanding complete strangers buy him all the junk food he wants, and in whatever excessive quantities, and it happens for him

So I wasn't surprised that demanding internet strangers help him was his go-to when he first landed in LA, a few feet from the Ritz Carlton, near tears after realizing that there was no attractive, wealthy 16 year old boyfriend free fecund ovulator eager to sire his children, as well as mother, baby, and support him. But absolute whatthefuckery that a demand for help this unreasonable and bullshit actually happened for him

 

[Narr Then]

Holy fuck

 

[ThomasAudley]

Lucas the globetrotter is an expert on Los Angeles and foreign cultures now after wandering around DTLA for a few hours. Hey Lucas, most people do wind up traveling to other cities and countries by the time they are 41, and many Americans deal with living in a dindu thunderdome and don't need you to lecture them about the virtue of Mexicans "frying up grub" and "entirely non-white crowds."

I can't believe the "he can't get to the airport" excuse. There are several airports in Los Angeles and public transportation all over the place and cash wiring exists. The bus ticket enabler wasted a ton of money on this moron.

I hope Lucas gets kicked off the greyhound in Fresno.

This would be amazing. LA is the big city that'd probably eat him alive, but if not he has ample resources to mooch off taxpayers more. And as he just discovered, the weather is nice. I'd love a homeless Lucas saga in some of California's shittier cities such as Bakersfield, Fresno, Visalia, or Sacramento, that are hot as fuck in the summer and generally smell bad even without unwashed Lucas stinking up entire city blocks.

 

[BIG CATS]

Hopefully Lucas misses his Greyhound tomorrow- the enabler is out their $250 and SoCal Lucas saga can kick into full swing.
If he makes it to Spokane he’s probably going to miss his shelter check-in time. So after all that travel he’ll be wandering around Spokane on Christmas Eve, where the nighttime low is supposed to be 21 degrees Thursday night.

This “Good Samaritan” really didn’t do him much of a favor did they?