Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

The suspicion that Lucas's recent dark period was due to yet another trip to the laughing academy has been confirmed.

After "arguing" with another vagrant(s?) and being expelled from his favored homeless shelter for 24 hours, Lucas took a brief trip to the laughing academy. It does not seem that the men with butterfly nets apprehended him, but rather that he announced his intent to harm himself and got himself a bed.
The fact that she acts like Lucas's tales of grandiosity when he phones are somehow positive is either indicative of her trying to put a brave face on his situation, or that she doesn't know her son as well as she thinks she does.

We all know Lucas is the king of grandiosity; during his periods of mania he will boast that his life is going quite well, he's doing great in college ...he's cooking great meals, and it all means less than nothing, because all of these opinions are colored by his narcissism and his mental illness.

If anything, I would be worried about a Lucas who acted like his life was going so well, because I've been around so many times when the other shoe dropped.

Myrna is either not very observant, or deliberately deluding herself.
I think it's a matter of learned, lowered expectations. Lucas has historically done so poorly, been so dysfunctional, that any hint of stability must seem like a victory. So long as Lucas isn't in jail or the laughing academy, isn't a catatonic, 400 lb. pants shitter, she probably feels like he's doing well.

This isn't to say that Mommy Myrna isn't a narcissist, or delusional, or tempted to believe the best about the very troubled man that came screaming out of her birth canal. Just that in the context of Lucas's life, a roof and a place to cook cheesy cukes is doing fucking fantastic.
I get the feeling that the reach out from Larry was less "we care about you and love you, Lucas" and more, "Well if he dies on the streets or kills himself we'll probably feel guilty so..."

It's still funny to me that the last birthday gift these alleged millionaires sent to him was a $25 PF Chang's gift card and he tried to flex that on Youtube.
I share this feeling with you, most of it anyway, though I suspect that it was fear more than guilt that drove them.
Edit: right before 14 minutes, he says he's been " walking around happy with a boner" just so's you know...gross. So the acorn has grown into a... slightly more oblong acorn.
That's some quality content right there. I love it when Lucas proudly reminds us that he is male. He gets hard, guys. He is capable of fornication. He isn't a sexless, useless thing. He's a man, and he is fully capable of running some guts with his functional penis.
 
Does anyone else think it's strange that Lucas has referred to himself as a girl in two of today's videos?

In the video where he tied his hair back the title refers to him as a girl tying his "Easter Bob" back, and in the rite aid video the title talks about your girlfriend's snacks. Im sparing you his ghetto fabulous misspellings.

At first I thought this was just some of his oh so clever wordplay, but it really seems like these references are to himself, right?

Or is this some malapropism of Gen Z slang that ya boi Q-bert Don't know?

Best guess is that he's straight up in a, "Hello fellow youths" level of trying and failing to understand how slang works or he's trying to subtly indicate that he's a stereotypically effeminate gay man despite claiming to be straight in one of the newest videos because those are typically the only sort of man who says "gurl"

Also, I decided the banana in the youtube channel banner was giving him too much credit, so the new banner features an acorn instead.
 
I'm not against social services but Lucas is such an effective ironclad argument against it I'm having a hard time reconciling my principles lol. It's actually making me physically recoil listening to him smugly drone about the stimulus checks he got and the one he's about to get ("the biggest one yet")

The whole point of the stimulus checks were to help out the general (working) population who were presumedly affected by the rona. Lucas has been nothing but a leech on society his whole life, with potential to be great harm with him being a degenerate pedo (fortunately he's a disgusting smelly tard who's so far been too slow moving and utterly inept to get close to a potential victim)

But corona shouldn't have affected his living out his wretched life as a fat pedo fuck in any way so it makes zero sense he is eligible to get one. I think it's especially hard to swallow when there are undocumented workers who bust their ass in 16-18 hour days in the service industry, who were definitely affected by corona but cannot get any kind of help

While this piss soaked fuck gets to spend thousands of dollars in greasy food and hotel rooms, so he can continue to obsessively plot a way to get his rotting beetus fingers on a young girl to fist

Like other posts have pointed out already, he does suddenly look like he's aged at an alarming rate. Seeing him all greyed out, looking like he hasn't slept in weeks, with a bunch of sores on his face, talking about creating a board game does put things into perspective and I suppose I don't have be such a moti faggot
 
Still going at it:


IF YOU'RE GONNA WRITE IN YOUR 2ND GRADE SYTLE HANDWRITING YOU GOTTA KEEP IT IN FRAME, FUCKTARD.

Mark 23 isn't...a real thing.

There is no Mark 23.

There's Mark 1:23, Mark 2:3, and Mark 2:23 but none of them are about hypocrites (I might be transcribing his stupid notebook scrawls at the moment).

Respectively the three real bible verses it could be don't make much sense apart from the one about the man with the impure spirit which is definitely Lucas.

Mark 2:3 is "Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them."

Mark 2:23 is "One Sabbath Jesus was going through the grainfields, and as his disciples walked along, they began to pick some heads of grain."

Mark 1:23 is "Just then a man in their synagogue who was possessed by an impure spirit cried out"

There's also Mark 3:23 "And He called them to Himself and began speaking to them in parables, "How can Satan cast out Satan?"

And Mark 4:23 "If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear."

BUT THERE'S NO FUCKING MARK 23, goddamn, he really is stupid. Powerlevel of I grew up having the strictest damned confirmation/sunday school teacher who made us do so much memorization that when I saw him write Mark 23, I paused it right there because my brain did a record scratch and, "Wait, the gospel of Mark is only 4 fucking chapters, there is no Mark 23!"

Anyway I got past the part where he tries to write with the pen upside down and he's back to bible verses.

It's not even at the halfway mark yet, this is torture.
 
Last edited:
Perhaps the predictions of Lucas trooning out will soon come to fruition.

He talks a LOOOOTTT about other guys for someone who's straight, could be some suppressed sexual desire in there. Remember that video a while back where he kept saying shit like "what do you think I'd want, your cock up my ass?"

Lucas never fails to reach new levels of depraved so I don't think its entirely out of the question that he pulled a complete 180 and trooned out, changed his stance to wanting to be a stay at home wife then started telling all the gen Z baes to stop hoarding all the flatbills. Remember that one video where he was talking about why he's husband material and then just rattled off 50's stay at home housewife skills?

20210321_213856.jpg
 
Last edited:
I'm not against social services but Lucas is such an effective ironclad argument against it I'm having a hard time reconciling my principles lol. It's actually making me physically recoil listening to him smugly drone about the stimulus checks he got and the one he's about to get ("the biggest one yet")

The whole point of the stimulus checks were to help out the general (working) population who were presumedly affected by the rona. Lucas has been nothing but a leech on society his whole life, with potential to be great harm with him being a degenerate pedo (fortunately he's a disgusting smelly tard who's so far been too slow moving and utterly inept to get close to a potential victim)

But corona shouldn't have affected his living out his wretched life as a fat pedo fuck in any way so it makes zero sense he is eligible to get one. I think it's especially hard to swallow when there are undocumented workers who bust their ass in 16-18 hour days in the service industry, who were definitely affected by corona but cannot get any kind of help

While this piss soaked fuck gets to spend thousands of dollars in greasy food and hotel rooms, so he can continue to obsessively plot a way to get his rotting beetus fingers on a young girl to fist

Like other posts have pointed out already, he does suddenly look like he's aged at an alarming rate. Seeing him all greyed out, looking like he hasn't slept in weeks, with a bunch of sores on his face, talking about creating a board game does put things into perspective and I suppose I don't have be such a moti faggot


Observing Lucas over a period of time is a black pill, for sure.

It shows that some people are just incapable of helping themselves and making their lives better no matter what tools and how much money you give them.
 
Cruel Summer playing in the background.

Foreshadowing, perhaps?

Hobo Hut needs to let him scream until they get tired of him and kick him out, I'm not digging having to transcribe this bullshit.

It's not that I can't read his handwriting, mine is arguably shittier half the time, it's that it's so boring, it's literally the written version of all the big boy words he knows on a loop.
 
Jeeezus, his mind is deteriorating at an alarming rate. The way he compulsively mutters "hypocrite" while writing "I love you, Gen Z" is just fucking grim. He's spent the better part of a decade just cycling the same ten or twelve thoughts and phrases through his decaying brain trying to make himself feel better and reassure himself that nothing is his fault. But he's clearly just getting more and more miserable, more and more desperate, to the point where he makes a video like this. He can't rant and rave verbally because there are people around, but he can't wait til he's alone, he needs to vomit his insanity in some form. Fuck dude
 
Cause & Effect - underlined at the very end there, that's a little chilling.

Edit: Kind of reminds me of journals full of ramblings people have left at the bus stop or shoved in newspaper holders for some reason. This would take the cake though I'd be more than a little freaked out finding that journal.
 
Last edited:
Between his "I wanna die, Gen Zeeeee" bullshit and his making notes whilst muttering his buzzwords under his breath, I'm getting the feeling that he's heading for some sort of "event"; whether that's another rubber-room sojourn or something more... amusing.
I'm not sure whether to rate this "horrifying" or "optimistic".
This thread really seems to get the usual calls of "this is it, Lucas is gearing up to do something!" just for Lucas to continue living on as a loner hobo pussy afraid of confrontation.

On the flip side I don't want to have any optimism for the thought of Wern actually doing something to someone.
 
Back