I'm going to unban Scot and I apologize Scot for banning you. Uh, the biggest reason perhaps is because whatever you did that annoyed me, uh—let's face facts—on a completely different day, the— If there was a punishment, it would have been effectively nothing. You probably just would have been removed from the game and that's about it.
It's— It's wrong for a person to receive a greater punishment for factors entirely outside of their control that they had no ability to influence. Even my expectation that you heard—that I wanted experienced people—was perhaps unjustified because people joined the stream any given time. Um, I attribute more malice to your actions than— then is warranted. It's not like I spent a lot of time making sure everyone in that room was experienced as— experienced as I desired, you know. That's on me.
I suppose one of the greatest things I enjoy about this job is that I have the ability to make other people's days very easily. I respond to a message and people like, "Oh, this is wonderful," and stuff. And that's why I used to spend so much time, uh, answering all my DMs possible on any platform, just because I knew people would really enjoy it. I have less time do that now, of course, and that's why I've closed my Twitter DMs.
But there's a flip side to that where I can ruin a person's day really easily and it's something that— because you— I have never really stopped thinking of myself as just a guy. It's still always a surprise when people treat me as more than that. I am just myself sitting in a room. But that's clearly not the case. Uh, people look up to me. People expect certain things of me. Whether that's warranted or not, people do expect such things.
And I'm clearly— I clearly didn't act in a way that, you know, meets people's expectations or even my own expectations. But I often stress, I am just a dude. We are all emotional. We all do things that are— you know, aren't on the basis of just reasons, rational thought. It's— Every single person in this world has acted as I did yesterday. It's just, in my position, it has grander ramifications than it does for a normal person, where they just, you know, move on their next day or the other person thinks, you know, "that guy was a dick" and moves on with their day as well.
Mine— My actions can have greater ramifications and for that I should be as quick as possible to— as I try to be, um— right wrongs when I cause them because I do cause them. I've caused them many times over the course of, uh, these years. As I mentioned in the comments, many of my— my VIPs—the— the people who get the little diamond next their name—are just people that I feel like I've wronged in some small way. Because while I can't control myself at all times—because we are emotional as humans—I can certainly control my response after the fact. And while I still think some response was warranted, the response I gave was clearly unwarranted.
So again, I apologize Scot. Uh, while I planned to apologize already, I— I'd receive— Someone— Well, someone put your comment on Twitter, um, and it seems we do have a lot in common in terms of anxiety and worrying about whether people hate us and— and whatnot. Um, I'm sorry I've let you down, you know. I cannot undo what was done but if you want VIP and 12 months worth of sub in my chat, I'll give it to you. I'm— I'll be happy to have you around. If for nothing else, you'll be a reminder for me to, you know, introspect whenever one of these events happens and— and more quickly come to the realization that I always feel bad after something like this happens, uh, and that I should, you know, may either not say anything until I've, uh, had enough time for my head to clear or just accept that eventually I'm gonna feel terrible and, uh— and actually just right the wrong as soon as it happens.
I'm sorry again and sorry to everyone that I've let down or communicated with badly over the course of, uh, this day.
