NewOld Content Part 2 - This is where the rest of this shit goes

[zap2theextreme]

There was no email after that so that probably means we spoke over the phone. I imagine it was me sternly telling him that I did not appreciate him getting sassy with me. Chris has balls when he can just type it all out, but he recoils when he has to hear it. You can also thank @Alec Benson Leary for his contributions to the emails.

two more questions

1. In all the 7-8 years of you talking to him has he ever taken one piece of advice from you and followed through on it?

2. Chris has been on 100s of dating websites do you know if he has ever actually gone a real date that wasn't one a troll planned?

 

[The American Hedgehog]

This was during probably the peak of Chris' spending habits because he started lying about what he was buying.

That's some impressive tard rage.

 

[butt in trouble]

That was honestly one of the funniest chimp outs I've ever seen from Chris. It's practically oozing with cwcisms. And all that brought it on was you basically saying "no Chris, it's YOUR fault."
Also, these seem to be from around the same time as the jackie emails and seem to follow the same pattern. Chris even uses the same "is it so hard for someone to feel sorry me" line in a slightly different manner.

 

[CWCforPresident2016]

I am doing what I can to stay in the emotionally and socially costing house my senior citizen parents own

Because he could have spread his wings and left whenever he wished to be self-sufficient, but he stayed to support and care for his parents and should be commended for what a fantastic job he's done.

I am slow in the head and autistic but I do what I can

Honestly, he has never used his autism as an excuse nor has he let it hold him back from becoming the best he could possibly be.

I have been sarcastic throughout this message

So have I Chris, so have I.

 

[butt in trouble]

I remember reading some messages on the Cwcki where Chris tried to get a guy friend to pick through OKCupid women and send them messages for him--thus eliminating any work for himself

I remember this too. It seemed like Chris wanted the guy to meet a woman, get to know her, take her out on dates and then when the sex was about to happen Chris would take over from there.

 

[Iam]

This was during probably the peak of Chris' spending habits because he started lying about what he was buying.

Chris sounds like an absolute idiot in these. Not that is anything new but at times one cannot help but feel sorry for him and then one stumbles on things like this and all sympathy goes down the drain. The spiteful tone is hard to take so I am very glad you brought some dose of reality his way, not that he would ever accept it for what it is.

And it's nothing short of extraordinary how he complains about not wanting a fat girl and then tries to make you come across as the one who is insulting overweighted girls. It's mind boggling. Also, he completely ignored the fact that the girl in question was actually working out and trying to improve herself. Instead of, I don't know, being supportive of her- which would be a great starting point for a friendship- he just goes 'I'm not fat and am not attracted to fat people'. If Chris is not fat, I don't know who is, really.

 

[LoveYouLongTime]

Chris is completely sane and stable.

two more questions

1. In all the 7-8 years of you talking to him has he ever taken one piece of advice from you and followed through on it?

2. Chris has been on 100s of dating websites do you know if he has ever actually gone a real date that wasn't one a troll planned?

He started wearing a bra after I told him he should when he complained about his manboobs jiggling too much.

Other than that? He would half ass everything. I tried encouraging him to actual exercise. You've all seen those work out videos. He actually applied to a few jobs and got an interview with Target. Is that new information? But he basically creeped on the interviewer.

 

[The American Hedgehog]

Chris is completely sane and stable.

That's a great A-log impression from Chris.

He started wearing a bra after I told him he should when he complained about his manboobs jiggling too much.

Other than that? He would half ass everything. I tried encouraging him to actual exercise. You've all seen those work out videos. He actually applied to a few jobs and got an interview with Target. Is that new information? But he basically creeped on the interviewer.

What'd he say to the interviewer?

 

[Gunslinger]

This was during probably the peak of Chris' spending habits because he started lying about what he was buying.

You really have the patience of Job and I have to commend you for it. You were brutally honest with him but not in a way that was overly hurtful. I'm sure Chris didn't see it that way, though. I shouldn't be surprised that he said you were the one who needed a 'tude check' and 'manners reeducation', especially with the attitude he copped, but I'm still taken aback sometimes by his gall.

 

[Flareon]

Holy christ is Chris ever delusional when it comes to his own appearance and self-worth. No one wants to be with a fat, balding, jobless, autistic manchild that lives in a hoard with his disgusting mother. He literally has nothing of value to offer in a relationship, and he won't consider contacting someone because they're fat? Fucking lol

 

[Iam]

Chris is completely sane and stable.

The violent threats would be truly terrifying if they were not so childish and impossible to at all take seriously. But the animosity behind them is very real and truly disturbing.

And it's amusing how all the insults he is throwing at Tito are dripping with projection. Calling him fat, low class, obnoxious, 'pug-ugly', etc. It's a textbook case of 'I know you are but what am I' and another example Chris has a playground mentality.

 

[Holdek]

@LoveYouLongTime Just curious, why have you decided to break cover now?

 

[InTheSidePocket]

I'll never comprehend what motivates Chris to reveal absolutely everything about himself, no matter how disgusting. I remember in his leaked Facebook message logs a girl told him (without knowing how weird he was) she wanted to meet, he then told her all about sonichu, the trolls and his life living with his parents as a high-functioning autistic.
She didn't respond.

the lot of us sat through the Un-Clit thread and I had a mostly cast-iron stomach.

But this... this makes me want to vomit. Somewhat snicker-inducing, but disgusting and off-putting. @LoveYouLongTime you and everyone who interacts with Chris are troopers.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

@LoveYouLongTime Just curious, why have you decided to break cover now?

Chris would creep me out when he tried crossing lines of being just friends, but I can't seem to think of an instance where I was absolutely mortified(though, I could have repressed that memory). I decided to start sharing these emails because I've been sitting on them for a while and I'm bored, so I figured that I can start filtering through them.

Emails are dated 2011, the 2016 date is the date I've pulled them.

 

[Trilby]

"You do not have to know anything about here to pretend to be me in a greeting. Do what you would normally do when flirting with a woman to get her response. I may even learn from you. All I'm asking is for you to find them and begin conversations with the first message. You won't have to send more than one message per woman."

Words fail me at the moment.

I think there was a Peanuts special where Charlie Brown pulled the same stunt on Linus to find a girl.

 

[Holdek]

One that sticks out for me is Chris complaining about how the employees at Burger King(or maybe McDonald's) fussed at him because he bought the cheapest drink they had then filled the cup with a more expensive drink. I explained to him that it was stealing because that wasn't what he bought, but he kept insisting it was okay to do because there were no signs saying otherwise.

Sounds like pure Barb, combining white trash grifting with Q-Sand reasoning.

 

[Among Which]

1 step forward and 2 steps back pretty much sums up his life

 

[Mark Corrigan]

This was during probably the peak of Chris' spending habits because he started lying about what he was buying.

I can't even imagine the stress sigh he must have uttered after that last e-mail. And his comments on your sex life... damn, what a salty cunt.

 

[Kosher Dill]

He actually applied to a few jobs and got an interview with Target. Is that new information? But he basically creeped on the interviewer.

I'd love to hear about this. Did he think that would help him get the job, or did he just decide the Fuck Quest took priority over getting hired?

 

[Karen Riley]

This was during probably the peak of Chris' spending habits because he started lying about what he was buying.

These emails are just beautiful. You did an amazing job of slapping him down after the email where he tried to call you out using his version of sarcasm.

Even for Chris, I'm kind of shocked how bitter he came across to you, especially in regards to your relationship with your boyfriend. It's like he had been constantly simmering in anger when you told him you had regular sex with your boyfriend, that he used the drama of whatever he was trying to do to get money from a DS to attack you on it. 'You have been most step sister like,' is an amazing quote at least.

Preface to this story: Chris asked me to locate women for him on OkCupid. He kept sending messages to girls who are way too pretty for him, so I picked a woman who was more on Chris' level. She definitely wasn't hammy or anything.

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In this he just comes across as an undeniably hypocritical asshole in the space of three emails. It's nothing surprising but to see Chris decry an overweight woman as undateable, only to throw a hissy fit when you tell him they might think the exact same of him is annoying and I'm glad you called him out on it.