So Sara had a ton of guys that were crushing hard on her in our dorm area. She was pretty oblivious to a lot of these dude's advances, but our little group kind of just found it interesting to see how clueless she was. There was one guy in particular though that was just so exceptional, and that was Johnny. One of the few conversations I remember having with them before they started dating was basically Johnny talking about how he's going to be the next Stephen King, and I shit you not, recited a poem he wrote for Sara in front of our entire group, then left. If you couldn't tell already, Johnny's an English major. Out all the guys that had a thing for her, he was by far the worst.
Weeks later, I see there in a relationship on Facebook, and I audibly groan, because I have to now hang out with this fucking sperg. He was the first guy who had the courage to ask Sara to be his girlfriend, and Johnny was her first boyfriend. From the moment this began, Sara was not happy. Her and Johnny had almost nothing in common, and Johnny would try and crack these fucking horrible jokes constantly that not even Sara would pity laugh at. She also looked incredibly uncomfortable every time he put his arm around her and tried to make out with her in front of everybody. I remember this one time he ditched her on a Friday night to go play D&D, and while our group was watching a movie in our dorm lounge, he barges in after his session, forcibly embraces her on the couch, then takes his shirt off in front of a group of several people, and proceeds to ruin the movie with both his bad commentary and his BO, with his arm tightly wound around his sweetheart. There was also another time he "serenaded" her outside her window (his words, not mine) and it sounded like a trapped cat. My room was a floor below hers, so I got to hear all of this. I got more stories about him, but these are the most cow worthy, and I don't want to type all my experiences with this jerk off.
The break up was messy to say the least. Sara had enough after months of her having to put up with his behavior, and she broke it off. He kept following her around everywhere, and they had phone calls that lasted for 2 hours that left her crying sometimes. There was one time I managed to catch a quick glimpse of her laptop and saw the whole page was filled with a fucking essay on Facebook by Johnny about something. I didn't read it because I'm a huge asshole, but not enough of an asshole to read someone's private messages like that. There was just so much text that it took up the entire screen and I couldn't not see it. For some reason, he got real classy and announced to our entire group behind Sara's back that they were just friends with benefits. Don't know why he told us that, but after that stunt, our group hated him even more than we already did, and from that day forward, many of us shunned him.
