Now that Chris-Chan's story is coming to a conclusion, who/what should be in the movie about his life?

[Plight of the Bumblebee]

This thread is exceptional but I nominate Tommy Wiseau to play Sonichu.

"I did not zap her! It's not true! It's bullshit! I did not zap her! I did nawwwt. Oh hi Magi-chan."

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

It should only live stream Chris's death.

 

[Second-Hand Boat Supplies]

I’m gonna suggest an avant-garde route and say every woman, (or at least every gal pal,) should be played by the same actor to lean into their interchangeability to Chris. Naturally, this culminates in post-transition Chris looking in the mirror and seeing the same image

This thread is exceptional but I nominate Tommy Wiseau to play Sonichu.

“I used to know a potential sweetheart, had a dozen brute males; one of them found out about it; beat her up so bad she ended up in a soup hotel on Geurrero Steet”

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

I’m gonna suggest an avant-garde route and say every woman, (or at least every gal pal,) should be played by the same actor to lean into their interchangeability to Chris. Naturally, this culminates in post-transition Chris looking in the mirror and seeing the same image

I think a CGI vaguely feminine blob with no face would do the trick even better.

 

[DownSouthBoi]

Chris should be played by an ugly troon so art can truly imitate life.

 

[Tikbalang]

Geno should be the narrator of the movie.

 

[Yksi_Toveri]

Chris should be played by an ugly troon so art can truly imitate life.

I don't know how well the Wachowski Sisters can act.

 

[♦️ King of Diamonds ♦️]

Make sure the ending of the film has the same cinematography as the ending of Suss The Jew (1934)

 

[PeggieBigCock]

You would star as Chris, nobody would be able to tell the difference so you'd be a perfect cast.

Lmfao you ratio’d that nigga

 

[Rapechu]

The movie HAS to be directed by Tommy Wiseau.

Think about it logically: Chris is funny. The way he talks is funny; his artwork is funny; the way he picks up girls is funny; the life lessons he gives to kids are funny; the way he responds to harassment is funny; the way he gets conned out of thousands of dollars is funny; his psychotic breakdown is funny. Literally everything about him is funny.

So the only way you can have a good movie about him, is if it's a funny movie by a funny director.

 

[Muu]

The rise and fall, start early life but cut out a lot of filler and just have a narration to sum up, end with Chris in prison and some text when he gets out or whatever with Geno's Chris Chan theme playing then play the infamous "and I just son clip" My pick would be:

Directed by David Lynch
Kevin Farley as Chris
Tom Hanks as Bob
Melissa McCarthy as Barb

 

[eDove]

The rise and fall, start early life but cut out a lot of filler and just have a narration to sum up, end with Chris in prison and some text when he gets out or whatever with Geno's Chris Chan theme playing then play the infamous "and I just son clip" My pick would be:

Directed by David Lynch
Kevin Farley as Chris
Tom Hanks as Bob
Melissa McCarthy as Barb


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Agree with the casting, except for Tom Hanks. That'd just be the obligatory celebrity and wouldn't be a good fit for Bob.

 

[Cletus Kasady]

I have a couple of ideas for the supporting cast

Anne Hathaway or Zooey Deschanel as Megan
Robert De Niro as Michael Snyder
Dane DeHaan or Shia LeBoeuf as Liquid Chris

 

[Yksi_Toveri]

The movie HAS to be directed by Tommy Wiseau.

Think about it logically: Chris is funny. The way he talks is funny; his artwork is funny; the way he picks up girls is funny; the life lessons he gives to kids are funny; the way he responds to harassment is funny; the way he gets conned out of thousands of dollars is funny; his psychotic breakdown is funny. Literally everything about him is funny.

So the only way you can have a good movie about him, is if it's a funny movie by a funny director.

EXT ROOFTOP: DAY
(Chris storms out of his room, stomping his feet.)
Chris
I fucked her! I was cleansing her!

Chris notices Null in that moment.

Chris
Oh, hi, Null

Null
(smoking pot)
Oh, hey Chris.

 

[NoodleFucker3000]

Not enough nominations for John C Reilly to be Chris.

Will Ferrel for Liquid Chris.

 

[T_Holygrail_Jesuschrist 2]

Nah, Paul Giamatti was born to play this fucked up role.

I could see Paul playing GIBi

 

[Chester Rigby]

Agree with the casting, except for Tom Hanks. That'd just be the obligatory celebrity and wouldn't be a good fit for Bob.

Bill Murray should play Bob.

 

[Pappy Striderite]

i just need Patton Oswalt to shave everything, do some coke, and recreate the making of 'flying elephants'.

no cuts, just 3 hours of moving the camera, checking frame, filming, stopping for a 'kid cuisine' nuggy lunch, moving the camera, putting a robe on to go buy cat food, checking frame, filming, stopping for fanta... "i'mma woodpecker!"

 

[A Pale Shadow]

My dream movie would be a surreal psychological horror comedy. Chris would be played by a really handsome actor, though it wouldn't necessarily need to be anyone famous. The story would be a retelling of Chris' life as he sees it, but there'd be little things here and there that are off to signal the audience that Chris is an unreliable narrator, like having a mirror in the background show his actual fat manchild appearance. Through the story Chris would be accompanied by a CGI Sonichu that only he can see that whispers terrible advice in his ear. Ideally he'd be voiced by Roger Craig Smith for bonus autist points.

 

[Hexbox]

Paula Deen as Barb.

“He’s high-functionin’ yawl!!!”