Old School Chris Crap

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I was actually unwinding with a bottle of Mike's Hard Cranberry Lemonade while reading this. I'm still going to drink it. Because, unlike Chris, I need it.
 
" ...I paused, founced over to my HDTV and try to feel her breasts."

Paris_Tuileries_Garden_Facepalm_statue.jpg
 
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I dunno, I remember the first few times I got drunk, I did things because I thought that was what drunk people do, or that it was "okay" because I was drunk. I doubt Chris actually thought Meg's titties were real, he just thought it would be a funny thing for a horny drunk guy to do.
 
Lack of use, probably. He lives with his mom and only goes out to pepper spray innocents buy more bideo shames so he doesn't get much practice with the spoken or written word.
Kind of makes you wonder if the trolls actually kept him socialized and more normal for those years. At least they kept him communicating.

In fact his early videos and written things are much more like the current garbled "blue arms" rants. Its as if only during the "golden years of trolling" his diction got more normalized.
 
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Chris thought that a mere digital-only copies for ~$48 of some anime was a "better bargain" then the physical copies for just about $2 more?

Chris mentioned needing a girlfriend to encourage him to "come to bed" at a normal time in order to fix his "biological clock".

I'm guessing Barb didn't do that for him.

Also, If CWCville were real, the US would invade with the goal of removing CWCville's monarchist government (by Chris' own admission) due to gross violations of the Constitution and US law. I'd like to see that in a Sonichu comic. Then again, Chris had some Goosebumps to read and some Zs to catch in civics class.
 
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I'm really interested in Bob 'n Barb's disapproval of Chris' drinking. Obviously his brief once-a-day drinking was bad, but it appears they never wanted Chris to have alcohol ever. I guess they couldn't bear the thought of their autistic baby growing up and getting drunk. I wonder if they heard stories or rumors of autistics going on drunken rampages or made the assumption on their own.

Also, Bob's beer of choice confirmed.
 
I'm really interested in Bob 'n Barb's disapproval of Chris' drinking. Obviously his brief once-a-day drinking was bad, but it appears they never wanted Chris to have alcohol ever. I guess they couldn't bear the thought of their autistic baby growing up and getting drunk. I wonder if they heard stories or rumors of autistics going on drunken rampages or made the assumption on their own.

Well, Chris has absolutely no self-control and zero sense of restraint. It's possible that they realized Chris developing a taste for booze would basically guarantee he'd become an alcoholic at some point. Maybe that's giving Barb too much credit, but I can definitely see Bob coming to that conclusion.
 
Yeah, you might allow your kid of normal or even slightly-less-than-normal intelligence drink with the reasonable hope that they would do so in moderation and only get really drunk in appropriate circumstances. But someone like Chris, with his poor judgement and addictive personality, is high risk for alcoholism. Of course Chris got addicted to lego instead, so bullet dodged, I guess?

Although given that he's capable of doing idiotic and dangerous stuff while stone cold sober, between that and begging for lego money, you could argue he's already got all the medium-term downsides of alcoholism anyway.
 
I'm really interested in Bob 'n Barb's disapproval of Chris' drinking. Obviously his brief once-a-day drinking was bad, but it appears they never wanted Chris to have alcohol ever. I guess they couldn't bear the thought of their autistic baby growing up and getting drunk. I wonder if they heard stories or rumors of autistics going on drunken rampages or made the assumption on their own.

Also, Bob's beer of choice confirmed.

To play Chandlers' advocate for a second, I'd hazard a guess that Bob, at least, had legitimate concerns about the fact that Chris was discovering alcohol at an age where he could legally buy it for himself, with no supervision at all and no sense of responsibility or real understanding. I imagine what he was trying to prevent, in his half-assed old-guy way, was the kind of shit that we see later in this e-mail block, where Chris sneaks out, buys a ridiculous assortment of garbage booze, and takes it home to get high-school-style shitfaced. If you were the parent of a developmentally disabled adult child, would you want to deal with this? Wouldn't you be concerned about the kid doing that in public?

There's actually something a little touching in the bit about Bob taking Chris to the liquor store to talk about his own experiences and history with alcohol. Sure, explaining that kind of thing is more age-appropriate for a 12-year-old than a 27-year-old, but at least Bob made a tiny effort to teach Chris something about being an adult, which he otherwise seems to have given up on sometime during the PVCC years.
 
Haha a prostitute hung up on him.

Wouldn't you? Imagine the scene. You're a Craigslist ho selling your dignity for a measly hundred dollars a time to fund your meth habit when some random retard calls up and says you're obligated to let him violate you for free - and on video no less! - because Jack Thaddeus stole a PSN account. Of course you're going to hang up. In fact, you'll probably wonder if it really happened or if you just hallucinated after smoking too much crystal.
 
"I have experienced the tipsy feeling"...sounds like the name of some fucked up K-pop/Metal mashup.

Also, wow, I never knew Chris' sleep schedule was THAT fucked up. Woke up at 6P.M., stayed up for over 24 hours, crashed into slumber, woke up at 6A.M.

I know Chris drank a few times in public, but I didn't know that he had snuck some cheap booze in. (at the age of 27 no less)
 
"Tipsy"? Man, what an understatement. I agree with a previous poster that it's a good thing Chris already has addictions taking up all his money (in this way). At least lego and video games won't destroy his liver/brain cells.
 
1.99$ per episode of anime.
Chris doesnt know what is a torrent right? He is bitching every day about his lack of money but he pays exorbitant prices for media. I just cant understand it.
 
1.99$ per episode of anime.
Chris doesnt know what is a torrent right? He is bitching every day about his lack of money but he pays exorbitant prices for media. I just cant understand it.

He really, really likes to have hard copies of things.
 
Has Chris mentioned alcohol when discussing his gay bar visits? Does he get ripped and shred the dancefloor, or sit in a corner with his 3DS? I'm curious as to whether he's back on drinking; also there is frustratingly little information that's been released as to his interactions with the LGBTQ community.
 
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