Funny how they've removed the 2 from the title when they're planning on introducing what seems like McCree 2, Doomfist 2: Flame On!, Zarya Queen, Genji 2: No, YOU Need Healing, and Juno 2: Mew Mew Power.
Hopefully this brown-shaded female character has a personality to go along with her tits. She's better than Female Soldier in the looks department by miles, hopefully she isn't as cardboard as Pharah and Illari.
Also, the emphasis on story (aka the current team merrily having their Star Trek: New Generation Because Fuck The Old Generation! moment) when absolutely none of these characters are immediately related to anyone
existing important is hilarious (and no, Water Zuko's sister Fire Azula doesn't count).
Jetpack Cat might be from the same space colony as Winston/Wrecking Ball because that's where all the sentient animals seem to come from, but there isn't one Overwatch,
Talon, Junkertown, or even
Vishkar uniform in sight.
Corrections because I looked into this:
- Domina is from Vishkar and her being Indian explains why she doesn't look like absolute trash: she's got the same stylist as Symmetra. Sojourn, the sole African-Adjacent woman, retains her title as the ugliest brown female in the game!
- Emre is yet another Overwatch-turned-Mercenary character because what else could veterans possibly do, right? Some more spit in Overwatch's face because this guy went to Talon. How brave, how bold. He's Reaper 76 with anime hair.
- Mizuki-chan is part of the fucking Hashimoto gang because yes, Kiriko and her baby gang wars are truly that important! He looks like one of the Talon agents from an old Archives event. I'd say I don't know why they didn't just make him a Talon agent but I do: ner ner Talon was created by the old guard and we're the newer betterer guard ner ner.
- Jetpack Cat is just some random stray cat Brigitte adopted and outfitted with gear, holy shit
Null Sector's entire storyline has been pushed aside for WuWu Magic China School (totally not Avatar Airbenders btw) and a Girl Boss Talon Takeover, so no new robots. D.Va's MEKA squad continues to contain a single member on the roster, now less than the WuWu Magic School, all these years after launch; Jetpack Cat would have been a fun addition to D.Va's persona and her celeb/war hero/vtuber crossover thing in my opinion but I digress.
What is the purpose of the PHREAKS? Or the Deadlock Gang? How is there still only one member of the Russian Defense Force (we know the answer to that but again, I digress). What is happening within Overwatch? Are they seriously gutting Doomfist in the story?
Like, genuinely, who is meant to give a shit? No legacy characters fucking matter anymore. They were the characters people wanted stories and lore about.
Soldier and Ana confronting their guilt but rising above their woe is me / violence is bad bullshit to try and save the world (again). Hanzo and Genji reuniting and reconciling as brothers and possibly teammates as Hanzo ends his aimless quest for redemption. Widowmaker's brainwashing wearing off so she can begin her melodramatic Winter Soldier/Bucky Barnes arc. Select members of Talon and Overwatch begrudgingly working together to fend of the Null Sector menace and reluctantly finding common ground despite their differences.
When I cared about the story of Overwatch, this is what I wanted. Interpersonal stories. I did not care if the omnic crisis was eternal. If there was anything to care about narratively, I figured it had to be character focused. The type of bullshit that would alter voice lines in spawn but still justify each game mode's objectives.
But now we have writers who don't know what a person is so they cannot write characters beyond them being mouth pieces for their personal values and narrow worldview. They are all so cookie cutter and detached now, it's painful. And the original characters have been watered down, even if some of them were cliched, at least they were bombastic in their personalities.
Now it's just Gayweaver: The Nice Gay, Wuyang the Nice Water Boy (he has no personality aside from water references, I kid you not), and Girl Boss: My Dad was Boss and Now I'm Gonna Be The Boss Because I'm For Modern Audiences #9294!
Fuck me.
