Burned Docs Parenting Class

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Since he had to take this "Parenting Class" now I understand why he expected a Dating Education class.
 
Well, Chris likely chose to take the child rearing class as an elective because there were no prerequisites and he needed the credits.
 
The Maxx said:
Also remember that he wanted to be a stay at home dad while his wife did all the work. I'm sure Chris thought that he would need a class like this to get ready for when he got married.
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I mean, with taking a parenting class, a wife was BASICALLY PROMISED, right?

Also, did the sympathy (:lol:) belly bend Chris' duck?
 
In sixth grade, they acknowledged sex with a very short unit in health class regarding anatomy, functions, stds and contraceptives. Very lame. The highlight was when a kid named Darren asked the female teacher if were going to get rubbers. She didn't know what he meant, and my friend George told her he was asking for condoms. George got detention, another case of the messenger being killed. In eighth grade, we moved into a little darker territory and actually had to get permission slips to take the unit, again split from the regular health class but segregated by sex. I was considering ignoring the class and not getting the slip signed, but when I surveyed my friends, they all said they were staying in the class, so I gave in to peer pressure. They passed around rubber scrotums that had something like 20 different lumps under the surface so you could know what you were searching for. They hit us with some graphic pictures of sexual disease sufferers, and put a condom on a rubber penis. They went all out for that, opting for the model with the suction cup base. I later learned that's exactly what some gay men use in their bathtubs. Of course, I didn't learn anything useful or interesting like that in class. This was around '96-'97. I'm sure we wrote our assignments in cursive, also. We'd actually be berated if we printed, since handwriting was no longer taught but supposed to be practiced in most everything we did, unless it was math or we were using a "word processor."
I really didn't learn anything, but I imagine some of the kids that didn't have a decent library at home or premium cable did.
I do wish they would have mentioned masturbation and homosexuality at some point. At that age, we believed homosexuals only existed in bus station bathrooms, and the nearest one of those was over an hour away. Legend also had it that something like only 0.00034% of the population masturbated.
A more memorable part of the eighth grade class was when the male history teacher they recruited to talk (he was semi-young, semi-cool and well-liked) told us if we got our mother's measuring spoons from the kitchen to measure our ejaculate, we'd find it filled about two tablespoons. He then sheepishly reminded us to not cream in any of our familial cooking instruments. Chris's class must've used the same textbook, since he made sure to use a plastic cup in the recycling video.
 
Pinhead said:
What do you mean, when you say "legitimately"? Obviously there are things you can say, and can't say, but could you elaborate?
I appreciate the reply, however. You didn't have to provide one.
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Brother:

[youtube]cNgxyL5zEAk[/youtube]

Only replace Austin with Christian and Vince McMahon with Rocky, brother!
 
Mogambo said:
Other stuff of interest... Chris depicts himself as fat, oddly enough, and with a continuing lack of fashion sense well into his adult years. Still wearing a striped shirt (albeit, not his classic red,white and blue look), the pedo glasses (though oddly both eyes are blue; Chris is normally so proud of his heterochromia), and an unflattering bowl cut.
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I assume that the reason for this is that Chris is so dumb that he didn't even realize that his eyes were (slightly) different colors until after he got pink eye that one time. If we could place this drawing chronologically ahead of that incident, it would provide more evidence supporting this.
 
Damocles_Sword said:
I mean, with taking a parenting class, a wife was BASICALLY PROMISED, right?

Also, did the sympathy (:lol:) belly bend Chris' duck?
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**~~new theory~~**

___

I thought the ducks with the suction cups were made so chicks could use them in the shower.
 
Mogambo said:
Again, I still don't think he actually had sex, but for the sake of argument, let's say Chris did have sex. There's no guarantee of conception. Some people struggle to have children. And even assuming she did get pregnant, odds are she'd just have an abortion. She's a prostitute, and I'm sure she knows the risks of her job. Easiest to just get scraped out and go back to working.
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I really wouldn't be surprised if Chris was infertile. He's the dead end of the gene pool and it shows.
 
My first sex ed was in grade 2 and we had this book and a textbook with naked laaaaaadies and men and we were supposed to label their private parts. More in depth sex ed we had in grade 6 and the class got divided by gender, us girls watched a movie about periods and stuff and the guys... guys things I guess.
The 'real' sex ed was in grade 8 and some lady came in and handed out condoms and brochures about STDs for everyone and some free samples of pads and tampons, we did the condom on the plastic dick thing and I think that concluded it.
 
My sex ed was in Year 6. We got to watch a lot of videos about how the body is going to change for both boys and girls, how to make a baby and there was a vid of a live birth discouraging kids from making the baby.
 
CWCissey said:
My sex ed was in Year 6. We got to watch a lot of videos about how the body is going to change for both boys and girls, how to make a baby and there was a vid of a live birth discouraging kids from making the baby.
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And here you can see the miracle of life.

"THIS IS YOUR FAULT! I HATE YOU! ARRRRRRRGH!!!! LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO MEEEEE!!! AAAUUURGGGH!!"
 
I sort of wish they offered parenting classes in high school when I was there (I am only a couple years older than Chris,so I mean, this wasn't the Stone Age) because we got one sex ed class and that was one afternoon only. My mom had the talk with me when I was 10, but that same year in school they pulled all of the girls in the 5th grade into the cafeteria and showed us a very outdated film from the 70's starring the broadway cast of... Annie. Annie explained to us where not only babies but also periods come from, why we grow pubes and even explained toxic shock syndrome.

It must have worked somehow, because there were no teen pregnancies in my graduating year all the way through high school.
 
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