Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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There was one kid in high school. Lets start off by saying that for freshman year, he wore this shirt:

CottonFlame.jpg


Yeah, he was that kid.

He had no social filter and was desperate for attention. During cooking class, if someone dared him to drink dish soap, he'd do it. He put some in a muffin before baking it once and ate it. I have no idea how he never got sick from that.

One time I jokingly said, "Bite me," and he bit me on the neck during the middle of class. I guess I was kind of asking for it, since I knew he was nuts...

Another time, during the middle of English class, he starts singing the M*A*S*H theme song. Specifically, "Suicide is painless..." which kind of worried everyone a little.

I met him after high school once. He had swastikas tattooed on his wrists and after I said, "Hello," he said that he doesn't speak to race traitors.

Never saw him again.
Holy shit, you went to school with Guy Fieri?
 
A few days ago, I spoke to Khalid for the first time in a while. His moods still seem balanced, but his other weird as fuck behaviors are still there. He now believes he's...something to do with genders? He's gender fluid, but also not gender fluid. I really have no idea because he went on a long and confusing diatribe which made me glad he stopped coming around. He still lives with his alcoholic mother, who sleeps nude in the same room as him (as far as I know, they don't share a bed, and he's not nude too). At one point, he was like "my mom's hot, I'd totally fuck her" which, knowing him, may or may not be a joke. At another, he just randomly started making these weird barking/yelping noises, and then acted as though it was normal behavior when we asked what the fuck that was.
 
Yesterday, I heard some news about Frank. He came up for business that also concerned Norman's mother, so they had to interact.

When he left for Florida, he took the maid with him. The maid has always been weirdly loyal to him, to the point of doing/saying things to make Norman's mother look bad. The maid has two kids, a teenager and a pre-school age one who is likely autistic. She took them with her when she moved to Florida, which happened during the school year. And they all lived together. This woman knows about the drug use and has been for some of Frank's freakouts, but still went ahead with this.

Well, to the surprise of some people, they were fucking. She's in her 30s and he's at least 65, though I'm sure he's older than that. His daughters are around her age. It ended because she found him in the pool with a woman younger than her. She freaked out and threw things and now she's no longer in his employ.
 
Okay, here's a story about a newer cow at my school:

I go to college at a super-loose, hippyish school where people can do really whatever the hell they want as long as it isn't off-putting. (For example, a friend of mine wears capes, robes, costumes, etc, but is perfectly nice and well-adjusted all the same.) But there's one kid, whom we'll call "Peter" who proves that doing what you want with no judgement can have its downsides.

As a part of my major, I have to take a class called Intro to Modern Art. It's not all that bad, I get to look at paintings, talk with my friend and just zone out. Peter's also in my class. Appearance-wise, Peter's an overweight mouth breather who either wears monochrome t-shirts that accentuate his gut and manboobs to a disturbing degree or tacky Goodwill shirts that say stuff like "New Hampshire Lobsterfest 2005", and is just generally sweaty and unwashed. I ignored him, until he got the class' attention in the weirdest way possible. What did he do specifically?

He eats paper in the middle of the class.

More specifically, Peter eats sheets of looseleaf that he tore into strips, tears off from the base, and eats with his mouth open. To make this even stranger, he also moans while eating and is prone to coughing fits. At times, it feels like we're in an episode of something like My Strange Addiction. He's so loud, obnoxious and public about his habit that in a class of eighty-something people, when you mention "Paperboy", they know exactly who you're talking about.

And Peter doesn't have anything like Down Syndrome, because he looks normal, and someone with Down Syndrome wouldn't be at my school, let alone in a class focused around analyzing artwork. As for my professional opinion, I believe that the :autism: is strong in Peter.

I'll post updates if something really stupid happens involving him.
 
Okay, here's a story about a newer cow at my school:

I go to college at a super-loose, hippyish school where people can do really whatever the hell they want as long as it isn't off-putting. (For example, a friend of mine wears capes, robes, costumes, etc, but is perfectly nice and well-adjusted all the same.) But there's one kid, whom we'll call "Peter" who proves that doing what you want with no judgement can have its downsides.

As a part of my major, I have to take a class called Intro to Modern Art. It's not all that bad, I get to look at paintings, talk with my friend and just zone out. Peter's also in my class. Appearance-wise, Peter's an overweight mouth breather who either wears monochrome t-shirts that accentuate his gut and manboobs to a disturbing degree or tacky Goodwill shirts that say stuff like "New Hampshire Lobsterfest 2005", and is just generally sweaty and unwashed. I ignored him, until he got the class' attention in the weirdest way possible. What did he do specifically?

He eats paper in the middle of the class.

More specifically, Peter eats sheets of looseleaf that he tore into strips, tears off from the base, and eats with his mouth open. To make this even stranger, he also moans while eating and is prone to coughing fits. At times, it feels like we're in an episode of something like My Strange Addiction. He's so loud, obnoxious and public about his habit that in a class of eighty-something people, when you mention "Paperboy", they know exactly who you're talking about.

And Peter doesn't have anything like Down Syndrome, because he looks normal, and someone with Down Syndrome wouldn't be at my school, let alone in a class focused around analyzing artwork. As for my professional opinion, I believe that the :autism: is strong in Peter.

I'll post updates if something really stupid happens involving him.

Is it possible he's an edgelord trying to freak people out on purpose?
 
Is it possible he's an edgelord trying to freak people out on purpose?
No, he's too dumb to be an edgelord, and if he was, he'd have to think of something better to do than that.
 
Okay, here's a story about a newer cow at my school:

I go to college at a super-loose, hippyish school where people can do really whatever the hell they want as long as it isn't off-putting. (For example, a friend of mine wears capes, robes, costumes, etc, but is perfectly nice and well-adjusted all the same.) But there's one kid, whom we'll call "Peter" who proves that doing what you want with no judgement can have its downsides.

As a part of my major, I have to take a class called Intro to Modern Art. It's not all that bad, I get to look at paintings, talk with my friend and just zone out. Peter's also in my class. Appearance-wise, Peter's an overweight mouth breather who either wears monochrome t-shirts that accentuate his gut and manboobs to a disturbing degree or tacky Goodwill shirts that say stuff like "New Hampshire Lobsterfest 2005", and is just generally sweaty and unwashed. I ignored him, until he got the class' attention in the weirdest way possible. What did he do specifically?

He eats paper in the middle of the class.

More specifically, Peter eats sheets of looseleaf that he tore into strips, tears off from the base, and eats with his mouth open. To make this even stranger, he also moans while eating and is prone to coughing fits. At times, it feels like we're in an episode of something like My Strange Addiction. He's so loud, obnoxious and public about his habit that in a class of eighty-something people, when you mention "Paperboy", they know exactly who you're talking about.

And Peter doesn't have anything like Down Syndrome, because he looks normal, and someone with Down Syndrome wouldn't be at my school, let alone in a class focused around analyzing artwork. As for my professional opinion, I believe that the :autism: is strong in Peter.

I'll post updates if something really stupid happens involving him.
Is it possible that he has Pica? Overweight + compulsion to eat non-food usually points to Pica. (Of course, even if it is Pica or a similar eating disorder, I deffo understand why you (general "you") would be super annoyed to have to witness that nonsense.)
 
Is it possible that he has Pica? Overweight + compulsion to eat non-food usually points to Pica. (Of course, even if it is Pica or a similar eating disorder, I deffo understand why you (general "you") would be super annoyed to have to witness that nonsense.)
It's entirely possible seeing how he'll eat paper every class, but I've seen him eat actual food before.
 
A little over a year ago, I found a site where furry artists can subscribe and livestream their art. For the most part, it's a really enjoyable site. A lot of the artists know each other, are very welcoming to newcomers, and are all around pleasant people. Very rarely do I see anything resembling drama on this site, and for the furry community that's really saying something.

But there was this one artist who kept popping into other streams and typing like a 14 year old girl. Lots of ALL CAPS, lots of exclamation points and abbreviations, lots of "lol"s. Despite this, she did buy a few in-stream commissions from some of the other artists, and to her credit, she handled this well. The artists always got their money, and she always seemed to enjoy the art she got without ever nitpicking about it.

She also had a subscription to the site and seemed to be streaming constantly, but almost never seeming to get any work done. One day, a couple other artists happened to be in her stream, and they caught her flat out tracing another artist's work. Cue a ton of screencaps, and the artist in question getting B&.

But it doesn't end there. Despite irrefutable proof that she had been tracing (I saw the screencaps, and I heard one of the other artists talking about it), she posted this in her FurAffinity journal:

Fine whatever im done with the bullshit. I dont want this drama. Im only bringing it up cause i didnt want my supporters to be like why ist't she streaming.
Continuing on, I dont sit here and trace line for line and some of my work may be similar to an image i referenced but its not identical. And images i do reference for poses or expressions, i post where i found the image and who the original artist is if applicable.

But the majority of my poses do come from human modeling pics or actual animal poses or even my own animals i've taken pics of. Like seriously guys, referencing a pose is not illegal. You know what, here's a test, Google image search for "cute puppy lineart" now scroll through and see if you start noticing a pattern of repeated poses. Sitting, standing, jumping, playful crouch. There are many same repeated poses but whats different about them you ask, simple, each one has a unique art style. STYLE!! Each one is a little different but still similar but you dont see those artist getting bitch slapped and slandered cause their art closely resembles another similar image.

This shit is ridiculous and i have spent time at the beginning of my streams practicing free hand and making a true effort to not need reference material, but sometimes the torso or and arm or the angle of the head seems off so i copy and paste a picture (usually not another's art, but a photo) and fix my drawing to look better then i delete that image and continue. I dont fucking draw line for line like people are saying. And they take stuff out of context/ screen shot it and only think "oooh i see there's another image thats not their own in their drawing so im gonna tattle cause what i see is wrong!!""" WELL FUCK YOU!! You had to start somewhere, you referenced stuff at one point or another, you cant tell me you just magically drew something and its perfect the first time.

I am pissed as all hell, and i think i know whats going on here, the second i became apart of Trusted Artists was the second i got "watched" and all my drawings get scoped to the highest setting and people didnt approve of my methods and declare that im blatantly tracing. Thats your GOD DAMN FUCKING OPINION, BUT KEEP IT TO YOURSELF!!! I dont go put my nose in other's business, so dont do it to me. I dont sit there and track an artists movements to find fault, that just you being a dick.

tl;dr: I don't trace, but I do because I suck, fuck you if you hate me for it.

Also, her art, whether traced or otherwise, is pretty wonky. However, she's also a fursuit maker, and honestly her suits don't look too bad. Maybe she should just stick to that.
 
A little over a year ago, I found a site where furry artists can subscribe and livestream their art. For the most part, it's a really enjoyable site. A lot of the artists know each other, are very welcoming to newcomers, and are all around pleasant people. Very rarely do I see anything resembling drama on this site, and for the furry community that's really saying something.

But there was this one artist who kept popping into other streams and typing like a 14 year old girl. Lots of ALL CAPS, lots of exclamation points and abbreviations, lots of "lol"s. Despite this, she did buy a few in-stream commissions from some of the other artists, and to her credit, she handled this well. The artists always got their money, and she always seemed to enjoy the art she got without ever nitpicking about it.

She also had a subscription to the site and seemed to be streaming constantly, but almost never seeming to get any work done. One day, a couple other artists happened to be in her stream, and they caught her flat out tracing another artist's work. Cue a ton of screencaps, and the artist in question getting B&.

But it doesn't end there. Despite irrefutable proof that she had been tracing (I saw the screencaps, and I heard one of the other artists talking about it), she posted this in her FurAffinity journal:



tl;dr: I don't trace, but I do because I suck, fuck you if you hate me for it.

Also, her art, whether traced or otherwise, is pretty wonky. However, she's also a fursuit maker, and honestly her suits don't look too bad. Maybe she should just stick to that.
"Fine whatever im done with the bullshit. I dont want this drama."

A true siren's call.
 
I work with two guys. We'll call them J and B. These two bounce between being a stereotype of an old Jewish couple to being youtube comment sections given human form. They are openly the main form of entertainment for everybody else during breaks or lunch. One moment arguing over conspiracies , the next J arguing over how B drives like a grandma, the next how one was shouting "nigger" over and over again after a couple of drink at the Tilted Kilt, and finally end with how could B expect a stripper to pay back a supposed loan of $1000. B swore it was a loan, not for a lapdance which made it even sadder.

These are the more rational arguments they've had. I'm almost positive J is slightly autistic, but I have no idea what is going on with B.

Whatever, it's free entertainment.
 
My personal lolcow the superannuated she-hippie continues to post hilarious nonsense.

- She forgives everyone who's called her a conspiracy theorist because it's not their fault they've been pumped full of mercury and chemicals and neurotoxins and brainwashed by the media, all at the behest of THEM.
- She believes now that the Pyramids in Egypt, Angkor Wat, Aztec temples, etc. are all giant machines to tap into the resonant frequency of the earth and create teleportation.
- She believes that both Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are fronts for THEM.
- She now has a job description of "Spiritual Warrior Woman" on her Facebook. No, seriously.

I'm so, so, so, tempted to make a fakebook profile just to yank her chain.
 
So there's this guy who used to frequent a Jeopardy! fan forum.

First, a little backstory: The Sony website used to have a dedicated forum for all of its shows, including Jeopardy! and Wheel of Fortune. I'm a game show buff, so I frequented both forums until they were hacked in 2011. The fandoms of both shows quickly migrated to new fan forums, where they are to this day.

One user who carried over from the old Jeopardy! forum to the new one was mbclev.

He frequently complained about a clue a few years back asking people to name Edith Head, the woman who holds the record for the most Academy Award wins. His complaint was that "nobody outside the academy knows" who she is. And when someone corrected him on the wording of the clue, he told them that they were wrong about the wording, even after they linked him to the episode.

He's still hung up on a 1995 Tournament of Champions game where a contestant forgot to phrase an early clue in the form of a question, and lost the tournament by the value of the clue. This makes no sense for many reasons: the clue was early in the tournament, and there's no way that everything else would've played out the same had he gotten the clue right.

Another game that bothers him is a 1998 Tournament of Champions where two of the contestants made self-deprecating quips when they got clues wrong. Never mind that one of the contestants happened to be a comedian by trade; all mbclev can think is that he (the comedian contestant) and the other one were "being jerks" and "not taking the game seriously". Because God forbid anyone have fun on a game show.

Another time, he argued that a Final Jeopardy! asking for the total value of all of the dollar bills with Presidential faces on them was "impossible" because "I thought then (and still do) that it was a despicable thing for the show to do, because I'm sure those contestants that day had never seen a $2 bill in their lives." Yes, Final Jeopardy! is supposed to be tricky. It's supposed to make you think: do bills larger than $100 still circulate? Who's on each bill? Does the $2 still circulate? I actually knew all of this, but I still got the clue wrong because I made a math error. (Correct response: what is 78? [1+2+5+20+50]). And for further context, one of the regular posters on this forum is a six-day champion and Tournament of Champions semifinalist who was once faced with a very byzantine clue about Liederkranz cheese, which is still a fandom gold standard for clue obscurity.

His last tactic was to post a clip of some Australian Rules Football commentator screaming every time someone made a wager that he disagreed with.

Finally, he's also noted repeatedly that anyone who makes a mistake on national television should be haunted by it for the rest of their lives.

Quote time!

In general

and if any of you try to further argue against my views on this, I will rebut those arguments until I turn blue in the virtual face (and maybe even beyond that).

Well, I try, at least, to make the complex simple, like Rush Limbaugh does on his radio show.

I refuse to understand because quite simply, it is WRONG.

Yes, I do have the right to do [call a Jeopardy! champion an idiot]. This is the United States of America, and people do have the right to call other people "idiots" if they do something stupid.

I put myself in that player's shoes, if you will, and if I did such a horrible thing such as making a stupid DD or FJ wager, or God forbid, forgetting to phrase a correct DJ or DD response in the form of a question (and losing the game because of it), I would be upset about it for the rest of my life. Keep in mind that I have played J! computer games for a lot of years starting in 1997.

I will not compromise my views to suit your whims. They are mine, and no one will ever change them, as long as I live, and if you do try to change them, I will recommend the same type of action that you are threatening me with.

Regarding the 1995 Tournament of Champions

That time was a bad time in my life with a negative family issue and the specter of the original Cleveland Browns planning to move, which they unfortunately did. That mistake is the basis for all of my subsequent rants about such mistakes.

It is what I thought when I initially watched those shows in 1995, long before boards like this one came into existence, and it has been implicitly backed up by sports commentators, especially the Australian rules football commentator who mentioned Collingwood's kick that should have been called a 1-point behind rather than a 6-point goal. (He said that if Collingwood were to have won the match by six points or less, that mistake would have cost Collingwood's opponent, Geelong, the match. That has essentially been my viewpoint on J! matters like this, and none of you will ever move me from that viewpoint, and if you try to do so, I will rebut those arguments vehemently.

No, there is more than one person that it is painful for. Do you not think that Siegel's [the contestant who lost] family has had to live with this pain for all these years? (I am sure other people besides me has reminded Siegel of this, either in jest or maliciously, through the years.) Plus I'm sure a lot of other Clevelanders besides myself have had to live with this pain, too.

No, but thoughts about my previous traumatic mistakes still enter my mind from time to time, and that is the basis for what I think David must be thinking.

Regarding a 2012 contestant who made a spelling error that caused them to be ruled wrong

What will she think if her mistake costs her a wild card spot? Will she not dwell on it then, and for the rest of her life?

Diana, are you happy with your mistake now, because that mistake cost you a spot in the semi-finals, and you're going to have to live with it FOR THE REST OF YOUR [BLEEP]IN' LIFE! People will remind you of it until then!

her mistake cost her a spot in that tournament's semi-finals, and I reckon that Diana's inner circle of friends and acquaintances will still remind her about it for the rest of her life, like I basically said in 2012. (That mistake was sort of like what our Cleveland sports teams have done in regards to post-season appearances, because they sometimes make these kinds of self-inflicted mistakes, so we Clevelanders perceive any kind of competition as sort of like life or death because of this, and we have long memories about it as well. In fact, there will be an upcoming ESPN "30 for 30" documentary about it in the not-too-distant future.)

Regarding the 1998 game where two of the contestants kept making quips

If I ever see this type of shenanigans again, I will write to the J! staff and suggest that the tournament winnings of those who pull such a stupid stunt be revoked.
Maybe there might even be a congressional investigation into whether or not those who pull such a stunt intended to rig the game.

====

Also, one of the posters on the site posted a link to an episode where a clue was "It's why you can't take a picture of a man with a wooden leg", to which no one correctly rang in with "because wooden legs can't take photographs". His response?

I remember seeing that clue, and when Alex gave the correct response, I was very upset, because that is a terrible joke about someone else's personal physical problems. My father essentially told me when I was young that jokes like that are bad jokes which should not be told. I wrote the J! staff after that show and I said in that letter that that clue "is insulting to people who have wooden legs due to many reasons, and to have a clue like that is dehumanizing to these people. THIS MUST STOP!!!!!!" The J! staff essentially responded that they would be more careful about such clues (that riddle came from an old joke book, probably published long before people were aware about being more sensitive to handicapped people).

the stand-alone joke brings the personal problem of a person possibly losing a leg in a painful accident or a battle in war, or to diabetes, and it reminds them of the pain they had to go through, and they do not want to be reminded of it. (I think the late baseball player Ron Santo would not have liked that joke, because he lost his legs to diabetes a long time ago, and if you told him that joke when he was still alive, he probably would have been upset at that.)

====

And finally, when someone asked him why he continues to harp on mistakes contestants made years ago:

Because I am still experiencing the consequences of such a mistake I made more than 24 years ago, but because it is a personal family matter, I will not comment on it in a public forum like this one, and I would ask that you not speculate on what that mistake is. I am sure other people are still experiencing the consequences of similar mistakes made long ago.

tl;dr: Jeopardy! is srs bzns, anyone who makes a mistake should be haunted by it for the rest of their lives, don't make jokes about wooden legs.
 
I think we found a clone of Jonathan Mack Sweet with that sobbing of his. Seriously, fuck-ups happen, and it's actually fine to fuck up. Just learn from those errors and grow, rather than regress and gibber uselessly about something that happened before millions of people literally came to life.

Besides, Cleveland is cursed when it comes to sports anyways, just ask the New Browns who did as poorly as the old ones did. Or ask the Reds, which also suck.
 
FWIW: I would've gotten it wrong, not for the $2, but the mistake in hindsight that I counted Benjamin Franklin on the $100, but he was never President.... the arrogance of assuming there's only one way to get something wrong, when the number of wrong answers is theoretically infinite, is a special kind of stupid all it's own.
 
tl;dr: Jeopardy! is srs bzns, anyone who makes a mistake should be haunted by it for the rest of their lives, don't make jokes about wooden legs.

I actually remember this giant autist even though I've never been on that forum. He was featured on some other lolcow-type forum, maybe even GOMI.
 
Can't really blame the metalfag fedora for his hateboner on the LSD church, whatever is his personal reasoning behind it. Mormons are just Jews without the media influence or obsessive need for subversion. They can't be trusted for shit and only care about themselves, if Mitt Romney and Harry Reid aren't glaring enough examples of such. They see the gentiles/goyim as marks, not people.
 
Here's one of my very personal and minor lolcows - a dude I was in college with a while back.

He doesn't chimp or cause drama or anything like that. From everything I witnessed when we were in class together, he's perfectly nice and a friendly (if cripplingly shy and incredibly awkward) guy, but he is obsessed with personal branding. Also, like a certain somebody, he's very interested in various kids/teen tv shows and Sonic.

His internet handle is CartoonistDude. If you google him you'll find a bizarre, detailed, lovingly constructed cradle of various sites and social media accounts that consist of him quietly and consistently doing his thing to an audience of around four to eight people. He also has an online store, that proudly ships to Canada and the USA. It's supposed to eventually ship to Europe, but that's been a promise for a few years now. (I check in on him every one or two years to see how he's getting on and if he's finally gotten the audience he so diligently works towards.)

From what I've gathered, he made his CartoonistDude logo and name in grade 10 for a class project, and it's stuck since then. In school every assignment he did would revolve around his CartoonistDude online handle and be covered in watermarks. He'd also wear his own 'CD' branded buttons and shirts regularly in class. I had to send him a polite message on facebook asking him to stop when he would constantly spam me (and I expect everyone else on his friend's list) with requests to like and follow his CartoonistDude accounts across various websites.

The one thing he's done that to me that is beyond normal levels of 'lol :autism:' is put up t-shirts in his online store featuring artwork of his deceased sister.


Here's all his CartoonistDude accounts that I can find through a quick search on google. This man is everywhere.
homepage
instagram
twitch
youtube
twitter
steam
facebook
pinterest
districtlines
tumblr
soundcloud
spreadshirt, for those who want a second shirt-purchasing option
google+
deviantart
8tracks
deviantart #2
and most likely more if I searched by his real name, which he throws around pretty openly.
 
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