Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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Dork Of Ages said:
I like how hypocrite she sounds when she says it's cultural appropiation over the Korean tea cup, but then she actually causes cultural appropiation with that Madame le Verre costume and accent Mary Sue shit. Especially in front of someone from the Caribbean.

She moved out, right? Do you still have contact with her?

I lived with her for a full year, actually. Again, I actually did like living with her, I have to say. She was very respectful of other peoples needs and space and I appreciate that, and always tried to show her the same respect.

We sort of fell out of contact. Sometimes one of her crazy SJW posts will pop up on my tumblr and I think, "Oh Beth. What would Madame le Verre think?"
 
I suppose she was alright, based on what you say. Not sure if I could tolerate her SJW and Mary Sue moments, though.
 
littlebiscuits said:
Dork Of Ages said:
I like how hypocrite she sounds when she says it's cultural appropiation over the Korean tea cup, but then she actually causes cultural appropiation with that Madame le Verre costume and accent Mary Sue shit. Especially in front of someone from the Caribbean.

She moved out, right? Do you still have contact with her?

I lived with her for a full year, actually. Again, I actually did like living with her, I have to say. She was very respectful of other peoples needs and space and I appreciate that, and always tried to show her the same respect.

We sort of fell out of contact. Sometimes one of her crazy SJW posts will pop up on my tumblr and I think, "Oh Beth. What would Madame le Verre think?"
Any other story about your former housemate to post tonight? Rather interested to read more about her personal lol-cow antics.
 
My personal lolcow works at a KFC with my brother's girlfriend so he has some wacky stories to tell about that kid.
Like he was bagging the food which isn't particularly difficult and he just screams "MY STRESS LEVEL IS UP TO HERE" right the fuck out of no where and then it became a running joke in his work place.
 
c-no said:
littlebiscuits said:
Dork Of Ages said:
I like how hypocrite she sounds when she says it's cultural appropiation over the Korean tea cup, but then she actually causes cultural appropiation with that Madame le Verre costume and accent Mary Sue shit. Especially in front of someone from the Caribbean.

She moved out, right? Do you still have contact with her?

I lived with her for a full year, actually. Again, I actually did like living with her, I have to say. She was very respectful of other peoples needs and space and I appreciate that, and always tried to show her the same respect.

We sort of fell out of contact. Sometimes one of her crazy SJW posts will pop up on my tumblr and I think, "Oh Beth. What would Madame le Verre think?"
Any other story about your former housemate to post tonight? Rather interested to read more about her personal lol-cow antics.

Oh, I'll post some more tomorrow. I've got some really funny ones and one that's a little scary, but still an interesting read.
 
My personal lolcow is the guy who writes the www.kiwipolitico.com blog.

He's an expat American academic living in NZ with rage issues. He's extremely arrogant and tends to flip out if you correct minor mistakes in his blog posts, e.g. his calling the Falkland islands an 'atoll' or calling the head of New Zealand's NSA the 'Director General'. He got fired from a local university for insulting a student and is still burned up about it six years later.
 
I've got one that I found on that bastion of spergy goodness: Fimfiction.net. It's a long story how I wound up there, suffice it to say I heard of a terrible Mary Sue story that is no longer there and it piqued my interest.

He's very much like Chris in just about every sense of the word. He's 25, still living at home, a pathetic virgin, seems to have Aspergers, has never had a job and loves ponies. Considering that he's on a pony fiction site that stands to reason but I mean he loves them. Seriously. He would like nothing better than to have sex with a pony. Or a dog. I've been trolling this guy for maybe a year now under several names and accounts. At some point I actually started to feel sorry for him and tried to give him actual advice to turn his life around but like our dear Mr. Chandler he's always got excuses as to why he can't do stuff.
 
I once had homeroom a guy back in high school who was OBSESSED with hentai and Yu-Gi-Oh and other things like that. I never hung out with him, but I did hear stories about the guy, such as that he'd throw fits over losing Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokemon card games and that he'd show his hentai collection to random people so that he'd think he was cool or something. And he'd think real girls would be turned on by the hentai crap. He moved away after just one year, missed by nobody.
 
i was looking at vintage backpacks on ebay, and I just remembered this lolcow from middle and high school days, Sean Hubbard. Something was UP with that kid. I think he was a smart kid, but he was just so awkward, tall, and loud, and gangly, and his teeth were all gum. He'd try to act cool on the bus, and try to converse with the other kids, but it was just this loud nonsense that would come out his mouth.

Other kids: Did you see the mtv awards last night??
Sean: THE PRODIGY GUY SPIT ON THE STAGE!

Also, one time he was eating a pomegranate on the bus, (this was before they were popular), and he was like, "DOES ANYBODY WANT ANY POMEGRANATE??"

He also had this GIANT camping backpack, but for school. It was this one:

$(KGrHqJ,!qQFJVtCKeu5BSZGn2iKp!~~60_57.JPG


One time he threw it on the bus seat, and it nearly hit this girl, and she pitched a beautiful bitch fit about it.

Sean's probably a fucking engineer now.
 
As promised, Beth Part 2.
Note: In retrospect, this story is more about her parents. But I think it explains a lot about why Beth is the way she is.

The house we shared was beautiful, 3 bedrooms, 2.1 baths. Yes, 2.1 bathrooms. Not 2.5. You see, the house this bizarre little feature, a room just off of the kitchen we affectionately called, “Toilet room.”

“Toilet Room” was really all that could be said for it. It was literally just a room with a toilet. There was no sink, no tub, no mirror. Just a bare light bulb, a glow-in-the-dark Virgin Mary light switch, and a toilet. The previous owners of the house (themselves a story for another time) had also replaced the original seat with a novelty pornographic seat. I thought it was hilarious, but then again I have the maturity of a developmentally delayed five year old. Beth was offended by Toilet Room’s crude attempt at humor and refused to use it. Not that she, ah, could. You see, Toilet Room didn’t exactly allow for ample leg room. I was the shortest and skinniest person in the house and even I had to tuck my legs bellow the bowl in order to comfortably fit. Beth was not exactly the slenderest person in the world, and fitting her into Toilet Room was out of the question.


Our first week in the house was amazing. The weather was warm and beautiful, classes hadn’t started, and we had a badass house to party in. I was worried Beth wouldn’t like living with other people- she was so shy after all- but since she had her own room, she assured me she was fine with it.
I should have known something was up when her parents came to visit on the very first weekend. At the time I rationalized that perhaps Beth needed help unpacking or had forgotten something from home. But when they showed up again the second weekend, and again on the third, I began to get worried.
There visits when something like this. Beth’s mother and father would arrive at around 7 am and block my car into the driveway. This happened everything single time they visited, despite there being an abundance of available parking around back. And if I decided to park in the back to avoid being trapped, I swear they would get out and move their car to punish me for my forethought.


Beth’s mother would do her daughter’s laundry while Beth sat on the computer and watched “Let’s plays”. Beth’s father would be in the bathroom. You see, as soon as her parents walked over the threshold the father would break out the newspaper and head for the bathroom, where he would remain for the duration of the visit. I once ventured to ask, “Is everything alright with your Dad, like, internally?” And she just laughed and said he was always like that. Really, I couldn’t blame Beth for how she turned out. A father is an important figure in a young girl’s life, and hers did all his parenting from the shitter.
In a house with 2.1 bathrooms, you wouldn’t really think having to sacrifice one would really be so much of a problem. But it was a problem. A big problem.
I am the soundest sleeper I’ve ever met. I can sleep through anything, alarms, TV’s, fires...anything. When I sleep, it’s basically like I die. It takes an act of God to wake me. Which is why when a strange grunting noise emanating from the bathroom roused me from my bed early one morning, I was a tad disturbed. I shared the master suite with Lana, so we had our own private bathroom. Beth and Joey had their own single rooms and shared the bathroom in the hallway. They never used our bathroom, so I assumed that it was Lana who was grunting from the bathroom. That is, until I felt her poke me.

“Hey, sleepy. You got to wake up. A thing happened.”

“ Don’t wanna.”

“Beth’s Dad flooded the hall bathroom and now water is pouring through the ceiling and now he’s taking a dump in our bathroom.”

“It’s seven a.m. Why is this happening?” I whined as Lana physically pulled me from the bed.

The kitchen was a disaster. Water was pouring down onto the kitchen table, spilling onto everything. Lana’s computer had been hit, her backpack, my homework, Joey’s clean laundry. I rounded up pots and pans to catch the water while Lana went next door to ask our neighbors for more paper towels. Lana and I were trying to mop the floor with bath towels, but it felt like we were just making a bigger mess.

All the while, Beth and her mother glared at us from the living room couch. Beth’s mother was inexplicably furious with us. “You girls shouldn’t leave so much stuff around! You girls are lazy! You have to pick up after yourselves! This is what I have to deal with whenever I come over here, you girls and your laziness! What kind of a girl just leaves her computer downstairs where anything could happen to it? If you had put it away before you went to bed, this wouldn’t have happened.”
My brain couldn’t process so much anger and chaos so suddenly after waking up. I think I actually ended up apologizing to Beth and her mother, though for what I still don’t know. They sat completely immobile while Lana and I zipped around the kitchen doing damage control as fast as we could.

Suddenly, Joey burst in through the front door. I hadn’t even noticed he wasn’t home. “I’m sick. I’m sick, I’m so sick, something has gone wrong. Oh God what the fuck is happening in here?”
“The toilet broke.” Lana announced.
He swore and started bounding up the stairs. “Then I have to use yours.”
“Beth’s dad is in there.”

“GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. EVERYONE CLEAR OUT. I’M ABOUT TO DO BAD THINGS TO TOILET ROOM.”
I could hear Joey suffering. Being a large man, he could not even begin to close Toilet Room’s door, or even sit properly on the pot. He was forced to kind of, side-saddle it, while staring into the decimation of the kitchen. Joey later told me that he had eaten 6 cups of activia, not realizing that they had a laxative effect and was now experiencing the vengeful wrath of “Bifitus Regularus”.

Lana and I fled for the living room where Beth and her mother were now watching T.V.
“I hope girls don’t think you’re done in there.” Beth’s mother sneered.
“You have to call a plumber. I’m out of minutes on my phone so I can’t do it.” Beth added helpfully.

“Of course not! You’ve done so much already. You just sit there while Lana and I take care of everything.” I said, now in full bitch mode.

“Well I have homework. I don’t have time to deal with this! And it’s not my fault I don’t have minutes! It’s your fault! You used my phone the other day to call yours when you lost yours. This is your entire fault!” We should have beaten her. It was clearly the right thing to do. Instead I stopped bitching and called the plumber like a goddamn adult. And later that night I and got fall down drunk while playing Pokémon. Like a goddamn adult.
 
My personal lolcow is a guy named Daftworld.
He's this French dude who's fucking obsessed with Daft Punk. And I mean, obsessed to the point where he posted Thomas Bangalter's home address in LA.
If you know anything about Daft Punk, they're the guys who dress up as robots. They do this to protect their own identities and to separate their personal lives from their music. Mind that Thomas and Guy are both in their late thirties and have families of their own.
Daftworld denies them every single right to privacy. This includes taking pictures of their kids, posting one of Thomas's kid's videos for a school project on his Youtube channel. He also met Guy-manuel and kissed him on the cheek and nearly strangled him with a scarf.
He gets really mad when people call him out on his shit, and I mean like on his Facebook he has an entire album dedicated to making fun of people who have made fun of him. Like dude you're stalking to people who are very secretive. What's wrong with you?
Oh he also doesn't source art when he posts it on his Facebook. Huge pet peeve of mine.

Edit: Just as a bit of a note, I consider him a lolcow because of his obsession with Daft Punk and his inability to take criticism or realize what he's doing wrong. This guy has a family - a wife, and like 2 kids. Apparently he works at McDonalds and spends his paycheck on Daft Punk merchandise. He's a strange, strange man.
 
Hornets said:
My personal lolcow is a guy named Daftworld.
He's this French dude who's fucking obsessed with Daft Punk. And I mean, obsessed to the point where he posted Thomas Bangalter's home address in LA.
If you know anything about Daft Punk, they're the guys who dress up as robots. They do this to protect their own identities and to separate their personal lives from their music. Mind that Thomas and Guy are both in their late thirties and have families of their own.
Daftworld denies them every single right to privacy. This includes taking pictures of their kids, posting one of Thomas's kid's videos for a school project on his Youtube channel. He also met Guy-manuel and kissed him on the cheek and nearly strangled him with a scarf.
He gets really mad when people call him out on his shit, and I mean like on his Facebook he has an entire album dedicated to making fun of people who have made fun of him. Like dude you're stalking to people who are very secretive. What's wrong with you?
Oh he also doesn't source art when he posts it on his Facebook. Huge pet peeve of mine.

Edit: Just as a bit of a note, I consider him a lolcow because of his obsession with Daft Punk and his inability to take criticism or realize what he's doing wrong. This guy has a family - a wife, and like 2 kids. Apparently he works at McDonalds and spends his paycheck on Daft Punk merchandise. He's a strange, strange man.
Having read that, I though he would be some teenager or college student until I read the edit part. Having a family and spending the paycheck on Daft Punk merchandise, isn't that nice?
 
What was his wife like? How can anyone put up with their spouse spending their money on crap and not on grocery and bills when you got kids?
 
AtroposHeart said:
What was his wife like? How can anyone put up with their spouse spending their money on crap and not on grocery and bills when you got kids?

Honestly, I'm not sure how she puts up with it. He has videos of him opening merchandise he's gotten in the mail and his children help him and stuff. His children are really young looking too. There's also a video of him and his wife doing some karaoke thing and they seem to be happy together (which, in my opinion, seems impossible).
 
sparklemilhouse said:
I looked him up on google images. His face even exudes "loser".

He's a huge loser. There's also pictures of him with other French music artists, such as Justice.
Oh and btw he lives right near where Daft Punk both live in France. It's sad, really.
There's an in-joke with the Daft Punk fandom that whenever they see him, they just roll their eyes and say "Oh, it's THAT guy again."
 
So, this is the story of Tweedleweeb and Tweedleboo.

I've stated before I love Super Sentai. And I have a fanfiction account where once in a while I'll post fanfics.

In December 2012, the series Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger was almost over. It also brought really bad writers to fanfiction.net.

These writers were total weebs and were newbies to the sentai world--they were crossovers from Power Rangers, the neo-Saban era (they think Power Rangers Samurai is a work of art, it's not, it's a pile of shit with corn in it): gratuitous Japanese in their fics (romanji, actually) and reviews, and no understanding of Japanese. I'll include Japanese in my sentai fics but only based off of the situation, or if I can't find a good English substitute for the word.

They clearly watched sentai with blinders on. Before then, the gokaiger fics weren't really ship-heavy. And then all of the sudden, there were a shitload of MarvelousxAhim (GokaiRed, Captain Marvelous, and GokaiPink, Ahim who is a princess. Pirate/princess cliche BLECH!).

I better give you some background info:

In episode 41, Ahim goes ballistic and tries to fight the Monster of the Week, who destroyed her homeplanet. And you find out why she joined the crew, and why they keep her, because she has this really peaceful aura. At the end of the episode, it's revealed that Marvelous didn't want to lose her, and everyone assumed that it was because he loved Ahim. It's because she was an important part of the crew. Usually the dilemmas the Gokaigers encounter affect the whole crew, they are like a family, and they all need each other. A lot of these shippers ignored the fact that early on in the series, and even towards the end, the only real romance the writers hinted at was Joe (Gokai Blue, the first mate, who has a legitimately angsty history) and Ahim. Usually when Joe is undergoing a crisis, Ahim is right there. And they seem to spend a lot of time together, whenever the crew splits up. At the end of episode 4, Ahim even licks frosting off of Joe's nose, causing Joe to blush.

Then there's what they do to Luka. Luka is Gokai Yellow: she's tomboyish, yet sultry, strong, very naughty, greedy, a total klepto, who used to be a street urchin, her little sister died while she was carrying her on piggy-back to the hospital, was picked up by Marvelous and Joe, and is now the crew's lookout. She's the third-strongest fighter even. Basically, she's one of the first ever anti-heroines on a sentai team--all she wants is treasure, supposedly. People in this little clique like to pair her with Don or Hakase/Doc, as the crew calls him. Don is GokaiGreen who was pretty much kidnapped to be their techie/cook/maid. He's cowardly, a spazoid, a dork, and did I mention cowardly? Yellows fall victim to being paired with the second-best by the fans (fans automatically will pair red with pink). So people in this group paired Luka with Don. Why? Because, Luka hits Don. And if someone hits you, that means they love you. The reason Luka really hits Don is because he annoys the fuck out of her. He constantly hides behind her when he's scared, shake her, and touch her, and if not, he'll hide behind Joe or Marvelous. Luka's the only one with the gall to call him out. Which is funny, not romantic. Luka never blushes or anything towards him or vice versa. There's an episode where they switch bodies, and what does Luka do, give him a makeover and flirt with girls in his body. She tried to help him get dates. People think it's shippy, but you wouldn't be trying to get someone laid by someone else if you were oh so in love with him. Also, they are the members of the crew who are the biggest polar opposites, and it would be funny to see their bodies swapped. But OHEMGEE, it's so KAWAII!!!! The reason why I don't like this ship is because it would be hellish if they got together. Luka wants adventure, Don doesn't. Luka constantly breaks the law, Don is one of the good Gokaigers. I know opposites attract, but two people with entirely different lifegoals would never work out.

So December was when episode 41 came out, and that was when the bad lemming writers came pouring in. The ringleaders were two girls, TweedleWeeb and TweedleBoo. They were twins (scary!) supposedly fifteen-and-a-half years old (they act and write like they are nine), believe they can speak Japanese (they can't), and purged a shitload of MarvexAhim fics, and LukaxDon fics every fucking day.

Now, I'm a MarvelousxLuka, and JoexAhim shipper. Now Marvelous and Luka, why? Because, they are both strong, dominant members, they both want adventure, they both love treasure, both love fighting, both are mischievous, when Marvelous first saw Luka, who was stealing energy crystals, was dirty, with messy hair, wearing a dress made out of a feedsack, he said she was cute (Marvelous has never called Ahim cute, and when Marvelous is thinking something, he'll say it). As well, Marvelous and Luka got a whole episode together (same with Joe and Ahim). And even aesthetically. All of the Gokaigers wear a different type of necklace. Marvelous has a lock on his necklace. Luka has a key on her necklace. They want the same goals in life, and they both seem tailor-made to be pirates. So I decided, hey, why not write a fic with them together because these shippers were making Marvelous and Ahim look canon (it's not, it's non-canon). It was a one-shot called Marvelous and Luka make dinner because this pairing was just as viable as Marvelous and Ahim, and isn't canon either, but has evidence and deserves as much respect or acknowledgement as other pairings. I worked on it on and off, and had a great time writing it, and made sure not to make it slathering in ship, until I finally put it up. I initially get a bunch of nice reviews, until TweedleWeeb (the main antagonist throughout all of this) put up her review:

"No we DON'T need ANY MarvelousXLuka stories! Ewwww... GROSS! MarvelousXAhim
FOREVER! DocXLuka FOREVER!"

I'd like to mention, by the way, that I was 21, and in my senior year of undergrad. And I was definitely upset. Mainly because of the lack of respect. So I sent her a PM:

"This was a review section for my fanfic. I'd appreciate reviews, not someone shouting how they don't like my ship. I don't like Marvelous and Ahim and I don't like Doc and Luka either, so you don't see me writing on your review page "OMGOMG MARVEXLUKA FOREVAH!" And I don't read fics with ships I don't like, either. There have been a severe lack of Marvelous and Luka fics, and they are a viable couple with just as much "evidence" as Marvelous and Ahim, and deserve as much respect and coverage.

I'm not trying to sound rude, but if you don't like a ship, don't flame.

Thank you!"

And then, I get a PM back.

"Um no they have NO EVIDENCE what's so ever! He shows NO CAMPASTION OR feelings
toward her. I read your profile. You just ship redXyellow unless there is good
evidence. Weird! You like TakeruXKotoha (blah! No chemistry WHATSOEVER!)
TakeruXMako lots of chemistry! ChakkiXKotoha PERFECT CHEMISTRY! PERFECT FOR
ONE ANOTHER! just HATE it when people pair people whom have NO CHEMISTRY!
MarvelousXAhim have that, he shows feelings for her. DocXLuka have that, they
show feelings of one another. And it is EVEN WORSE for Power Rangers people!
JaydenXEmily?! Ah, no way would THAT EVER happen! MikeXEmily!!! So happing!
And very few people like this couple! On who likes it is my sister! Gahhhh!
Bugs me SO MUCH! anywho... Yah. So no evidence... No couple!"

And then a few minutes later, I get another PM from her.

"Ok, I... Am sorry. I mean, we all like different couples, right? Well, not
EVRYONE is going to like the same couple as me or you. So I apologize I
shouldnt have written that. I agrees with a few of your couples. it just makes
me mad sometimes that people like couples that don't have chemistry or like
eachother. So, again I would like to apologize. I am truly sorry. Forgive me?
Please...? Anyway, I gotta go. I'm kinda tierd. Long day and it is 11:07 here.
Night!"

Yeah. That's not even a good apology. Does she even know what "chemistry" is? It's such a loaded word. The damage was done. I never responded to her.

Here is another comment that she made on someone else's fic:

"I like this VERY MUCH! Demo... where are Eri and Ahim-san? Another thing... why do you pair AlataXKotoha, MarvelousXLuka, JoeXAhim? I mean... AlataXKotoha, COME ON? Like that would ever happen. I think he has feelings for Eri. Don't get me wrong, AlataXKotoha are a cute couple demo, I just don't EVER see it happening as i know it never will. And... MarvelousXLuka, they have no chemistry. JoeXAhim have a little demo, I think of it more as a father daughter/deal going on, thats only sometimes, though. Other times they are an adorable couple. MarvelousXAhim have perfect chemistry and he shows feelings for her. Another quick thing, it gets kinda hard to understand what is going on in the story when you have all of those Japanesse words in it. Japanesse is an AWESOME languige don't get me wrong! Demo... there is too much for an English story. Demo, even with that this story seems to be... AMAZING! I love it and hope for it to have more updates soon! So... update, Update, UPDATE! 3

P.S. I hope you take NONE of what I said offensively, I was just wondering on the couples and trying to help wih the Japanesse. So please don't get upset or something."

Fucking hypocrite.

She got herself and her group into all sorts of shenanigans. Like one member of her clique (who was nice to me, and eventually left when Tweedleweeb and Tweedleboo played a mean prank on her). Someone (and I think it might be one of the twins) started a few facebook pages, and touted them as official facebook pages for the actors playing Marvelous and Ahim. And in those pages, they both spoke English. All of a sudden they announced they were engaged. Okay. First off, Marvelous's actor and Luka's actor were rumored to be a couple by a Japanese tabloid. Secondly, I doubt any of these Japanese actors speak fluent English. Usually when the American fandom finds out a sentai actor speaks English or is American, we think it's kind of cool and it becomes noted. Thirdly, they don't use facebook, and they would have announced on their websites that they are engaged. And fourthly, they are in their early 20s. There is an image of youthfulness that they have to uphold. So the nice fangirl believed it was true, and posted a note at the end of one of her MarvexAhim fics saying "take that Joe and Ahim shippers". She made a mistake. And people commented on it, saying that what she said was mean, and that it's not true. And she apologized. But guess who were throwing tantrums, insisting that this rumor was true: Tweedleweeb and Tweedleboo.

Once Tweedleboo wrote a fanfic entirely in romanji. And I commented that it's frustrating for readers who don't speak Japanese, and I followed it by saying, in Japanese "日本語を話しますか” based off of my assumption that she didn't know Japanese at all (and this is coming from someone who only knows a little bit of Japanese, but can read hiragana, katakana, and some kanji). Some other reviewers offered suggestions. And tweedleboo PMs me, and some of the other reviewers, calling me a bitch. That was the last I heard of her, except for a positive review she gave one of my fics, in an attempt to apologize and maybe separate herself from her sister.

Now they are both Koreaboos, and focused more on Power Rangers Megaforce. They did ignite a shipping riot when Tweedleweeb freaked out that someone made a video shipping the Red Ranger and the Yellow Ranger. How dare they? They were a lot of fun to observe, to see what kind of shenanigans they got into. I seriously wonder what they are like in real life. Remember, there are two of them.
 
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