🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Nod Flenders]

I guarantee that every moment he’s not online, he’s thinking about online. This is addiction in action. Not shocking considering who we’re dealing with.

The Gunt has an addiction to being online. He can't live without it.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

The Gunt has an addiction to being online. He can't live without it.

He will just use his sock puppets while pretending to be offline.

I’m not sure what the allure of AC is for him since he basically just places sportsbook bets on his phone, just like at home. He doesn’t play the table games that the average degenerate gambler heads to casinos for.

He just hates his nasty ghetto home so much a grimy cheap hotel in Atlantic City seems better.

I’m just waiting for his required photo of Pantsu sitting across from Gunt in a AC restaurant. The fact he made a big deal about getting offline during this trip is suspicious. No photos means he left Pantsu and Rozy at home, but didn’t want KF laughing about him abandoning his family a week after his two week trans-Atlantic escape.

If there’s no photos then he just left them in Richmond to go lose money and bang hookers. Him wanting to avoid admitting he abandoned his family for casino trip could keep him off his official accounts for a few days.

The irony is leaving them at home would have been the best choice (other than not going at all) because who the fuck drags a three month old baby to a horrible place like AC? Bizarre. Rozy had such fun being strapped in her car seat for ten hours and sitting in a dark, dingy $60 hotel room covered in germs and filth for days! Ralph is definitely the best dad ever!

 

[Polyboros2]

We're about 1 hour away from Ralph not tweeting for 24 hours. If he makes it, I'll have to give him credit and take the L.

I honestly didn't think he had it in him.

 

[Sam Losco]

We're about 1 hour away from Ralph not tweeting for 24 hours. If he makes it, I'll have to give him credit and take the L.

I honestly didn't think he had it in him.

He may not be Tweeting, but he's still reading.

 

[Individualism Incarnate]

I'm pretty sure that Ralph is poor enough that some sort of government assistance for obese people will get him one from daddy Biden.

Can't get gibs with a felony on his record

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

We're about 1 hour away from Ralph not tweeting for 24 hours. If he makes it, I'll have to give him credit and take the L.

I honestly didn't think he had it in him.

Don’t kid yourself, he’s just using his sock accounts to tweet and still reading everything.

It will be easier for him to stay off in AC because he will be focusing on his gambling addiction instead of his internet addiction and they have pretty strict rules for where you can use your phone. He can’t use it if goes to the table games.

Oddly Gunt seems to focus on sports book betting and slots when he goes to casinos - two activities he doesn’t even need to leave Richmond to do.

Can't get gibs with a felony on his record

That’s what baby mamas are for.

 

[Fìddlesticks]

Ralph could live in Ronnie’s crack shack right now, he’s Evan’s legal guardian plus already owns a 50% interest in the property which is vacant. The reason he doesn’t is because that would mean a move back to West Memphis where people in town actually know him, (and I’m talking about knowing the real Ethan Ralph, not the character he tries to portray on his “show”). Ralph was bullied so hard in public school his mama had to pull him out to save him. A lot of his fellow classmates never left town, they’re all still there, and I doubt they’re big fans of the Killstream.

Ralph had also run out all the potential new step daddies that his mother could have happily been with. So new town it was.

Sandra would have benefitted so much in having a partner to help her with her 2 retarded sons.

 

[AnOminous]

Imagine being Meigh and being such a degraded slut you're okay with being gunted and then cucked under your own roof by a rage pig gambling away your Subway pay, who takes constant "vacations" to fuck other women and leaves you in a vile, filthy shithole in a neighborhood full of violent sex offenders. With a baby. Lmao.

 

[Procrastinhater]

He may not be Tweeting, but he's still reading.

And seething. And coping.
And most likely dilating.

 

[Telemeter]

And seething. And coping.
And most likely dilating.

He read your post, seethed, then refreshed the page 5 times to see if it was updated by now.

 

[Leibowitz]

The Ralphs are looking at buying a home?

Lmao. As chance would have it, I actually know a guy who lives in Manchester, just south down Hull Street from where Ralph lives. This is the one area in central Virginia where house prices barely budged over the course of the pandemic, because it's that shitty. Crime is pervasive and growing. The schools are terrible. White flight started in the late 2000s, and now there are only blacks, hispanics, and old white people too poor to move out.

My acquaintance bought a house down there (against the advice of his family) because it was the one area where prices were consistently within what he could afford. He could have landed a humble home in one of the suburbs, but he couldn't be assed to fight with all the other buyers competing for those properties. So now he lives in a tiny house in one of the shittiest neighborhoods in Richmond. Luckily for him, his neighbors are hispanic, otherwise he'd be even worse off. Every time I drive through Virginia I thank God that they built interstate 295 so I can loop around Richmond rather than driving through it.

In summary: Ethan is exactly where he belongs and there is no way he can afford to escape.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Lmao. As chance would have it, I actually know a guy who lives in Manchester, just south down Hull Street from where Ralph lives. This is the one area in central Virginia where house prices barely budged over the course of the pandemic, because it's that shitty. Crime is pervasive and growing. The schools are terrible. White flight started in the late 2000s, and now there are only blacks, hispanics, and old white people too poor to move out.

My acquaintance bought a house down there (against the advice of his family) because it was the one area where prices were consistently within what he could afford. He could have landed a humble home in one of the suburbs, but he couldn't be assed to fight with all the other buyers competing for those properties. So now he lives in a tiny house in one of the shittiest neighborhoods in Richmond. Luckily for him, his neighbors are hispanic, otherwise he'd be even worse off. Every time I drive through Virginia I thank God that they built interstate 295 so I can loop around Richmond rather than driving through it.

In summary: Ethan is exactly where he belongs and there is no way he can afford to escape.

This is the most hilarious about Ralph pretending he knows anything about a housing bubble. South Richmond is about as cheap as you are going to find anywhere for a house in any city in America. The only places any cheaper would be rural areas or trailer parks.

What retard Ralph doesn’t realize is he’s fucked not because of the (non-existent housing bubble in So. Richmond) but because now mortgage rates have sky-rocketed. He, well a person with good credit, could have gotten a mortgage at 2 or 3% interest the last two years. Everyone refinanced because the rates were so damn good. Now it’s close to 6%. In layman’s terms, for a house in Gunt’s price range, that adds an addition $8k per year to a mortgage payments.

Gunt will be a renter till he drops dead of a heart attack.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Shouldn’t have to say this but y’all do see the irony that Ralph has taken time off of the internet and y’all have spent your time writing stories on the internet about how obsessed with the internet he is.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Shouldn’t have to say this but y’all do see the irony that Ralph has taken time off of the internet and y’all have spent your time writing stories on the internet about how obsessed with the internet he is.

I kinda hope he stays off, even if it means we lose our best cow.
It's not too late for him to come to a realization, what alcoholics like Ralph call a moment of clarity, that his constant searching the Farms and Twitter for stuff to rage about isn't good for him, and his lack of self control is fucking his life at an ever increasing pace, like a big shit snowball rolling down hill.
A fucking week away from his seething and raging might be the break he needs to get some clarity.
But I'm deep in rainbow country now, and even if it is Fag Month, thats as far as I'm taking it.
I don't think Ralph is capable of learning.

He's probably reading these threads right now, fighting the urge to respond.
Day by Day, Gunty, like they tell you at 12 Step.
This sorry fucking Circus that you call a life doesn't have to be this way.
You can end it at any time.

 

[The Big Dream]

Shouldn’t have to say this but y’all do see the irony that Ralph has taken time off of the internet and y’all have spent your time writing stories on the internet about how obsessed with the internet he is.

Matter ah fact I think it's yew who is obsessed with the internet

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

I kinda hope he stays off, even if it means we lose our best cow.
It's not too late for him to come to a realization, what alcoholics like Ralph call a moment of clarity, that his constant searching the Farms and Twitter for stuff to rage about isn't good for him, and his lack of self control is fucking his life at an ever increasing pace, like a big shit snowball rolling down hill.
A fucking week away from his seething and raging might be the break he needs to get some clarity.
But I'm deep in rainbow country now, and even if it is Fag Month, thats as far as I'm taking it.
I don't think Ralph is capable of learning.

He's probably reading these threads right now, fighting the urge to respond.
Day by Day, Gunty, like they tell you at 12 Step.
This sorry fucking Circus that you call a life doesn't have to be this way.
You can end it at any time.

He's not offline, he's just not posting on twitter. He doxed his own paypig on telegram, and you can bet that indian tennis money he his definitely reading the farms and twitter.

 

[GayestFurryTrash]

Shouldn’t have to say this but y’all do see the irony that Ralph has taken time off of the internet and y’all have spent your time writing stories on the internet about how obsessed with the internet he is.

I browse the farms while at work, reading autistic fan fiction is better than actually doing my job.

 

[MeltyTW]

Shouldn’t have to say this but y’all do see the irony that Ralph has taken time off of the internet and y’all have spent your time writing stories on the internet about how obsessed with the internet he is.

dont have to care, ralph calls it out he looks obsessed and drives more traffic here , ralph doesnt call it out then im free to be as obsessed as i want anyway.

Gunt will be a renter till he drops dead of a heart attack.

not necessarily he could become homeless and forced to live in the eternal streaming rv/ralpha mobile residence.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

dont have to care, ralph calls it out he looks obsessed and drives more traffic here , ralph doesnt call it out then im free to be as obsessed as i want anyway.

not necessarily he could become homeless and forced to live in the eternal streaming rv/ralpha mobile residence.

Considering the apt Drachenlord comparisons, he'll have to sell it and then live in someone's basement. Who's basement? Who knows?

 

[ChromaQuack]

Considering the apt Drachenlord comparisons, he'll have to sell it and then live in someone's basement. Who's basement? Who knows?

He'll have to go to Null's basement in Florida.