🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

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Will the "MMA" fight between Gabe Hoffman and Ethan Ralph 🐷 happen?

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  • lol no

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Rage Pig said:
Gunt is sober posting again. 30 days more boring than watching paint dry.
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We've been here before of course. Last time his big milestone was 60 days. Fell of the wagon more than half a dozen times following these tweets. Never stopped eating Xannies, obviously lying about it. Imagine being such a failure that you need to post this kind of embarrassing shit to strangers on the internet.
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my favorite part about Ralph is that this is like the 3rd go round of:

-claim to be sober
-at some point show up on stream obviously fucked up
-claim to be just tired or internet alogging him to make him seem fucked up
-squeal that he's sober and everyone is wrong
-get too fucked up to continue the charade
-admit that he was lying about being sober
-claim this time he really he is sober
-repeat without rinsing (because he's fat and doesn't bathe)
 
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You're gonna have to step up your game and take pictures with a 'sober' filter too, Ralph.
Just remember. There is no fooling that shadow.

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Ralph has supposedly been going to AA for a month but has offered no proof. Last time he tried sobriety he had chips to show for his time (he bought them on Amazon.)

More likely he's been taking Thursdays off so he has the whole day to stalk his physiotherapist. The actual session is in the evening, leaving the entire morning and afternoon to himself

Sometime last week on air Ralph got a call from a Mexican number. Uncharacteristically, he answered with no delay. The caller was a man who spoke Spanish and was very angry. Ralph had to translates some of the insults but he didn't share what they were. I'm now of the mind that caller was somebody close to the therapist, brother/cousin/uncle/boyfriend etc, telling Ralph to leave her be. Since the call, he's missed two sessions and has declared he's "basically fully healed and doesn't need to go anymore".

TL;DR Ralph's sobriety and " AA meetings" are a cover for his time harassing his physiotherapist.
 
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Mynameisdark said:
Sometime last week on air Ralph got a call from a Mexican number. Uncharacteristically, he answered with no delay. The caller was a man who spoke Spanish and was very angry. Ralph had to translates some of the insults but he didn't share what they were. I'm now of the mind that caller was somebody close to the therapist, brother/cousin/uncle/boyfriend etc, telling Ralph to leave her be. Since the call, he's missed two sessions and has declared he's "basically fully healed and doesn't need to go anymore".
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I had the same suspicion when I saw the tweets about his creepy stalking behavior. There are 128.5 million Mexican citizens, and not a single one of them wants to interact with piggy without getting paid. Pantsuela, Torta dealer, lawyer- plumber and his therapist are the only Mexicans he ever mentioned having a conversation with that lasted longer than a minute.
Pantsuela wasn’t able to suppress her feelings of disgust any longer and left the Guntosphere. Torta dealer pays for his kids college by selling spic slop to the pig, has no reason to be angry. Lawyer plumber is his landlord, piggy wouldn't dare to get cheeky as he did during the call. That leaves only someone close to the therapist as you mentioned.
 
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FiveStarAce said:
I don't know if "Trying to hook his physio therapist with Hunter S Thompson trivia" is a new low for Ralph. This is pathetic, yes, but in a bold and new way that's hard to describe. An aquired taste of cringe.
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You just know when she asked what he did he rambled about being a “gonzo journalist” and ofc she had no idea what that was. To clear the matter up he gave her a book with Johnny Depp on the cover to clear the matter up.

(I always thought it was funny that pretty boy Depp played HST. It’s akin to Jake Paul playing Ralph)
 
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Defending pedophiles is hard, being a 60 year old man who's at risk of diabetes is even harder. That's why Ralph relies on the sweet, illustrious flavor of French Toast Crunch to bail him out of having to dissect the pontifications that come out of that there Meltons mouth of his. Not like this is necessary in the first place, he is a Comedian after all (says so right there in the Twitter bio!) but it's always nice to have junkies addicted to Crystal Meth like Assmaster33 bail you out at the last minute with a $1.00 tip coated with syrup & cinnamon flavoring.
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:diddler:Dat derr French Toast Crunch so useful, ah think ah'll dew a RalphamaleTriesIt live on air! If only eating food for 8 year olds could get mah son and daughtah back... Oh well, can't win 'em all ah suppose.
 
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