3/26/23 - Day 5 of The Sober Spring Ends in Total A-log Death
Broke Dick Farms on Suicide Watch as Ralph Makes untold Hundreds of Dollars in a Single Night
Yesterday was a pretty interesting day for the Ralphamale, as he promised us a show where
he actually does prep before hand like literally everyone else does in the sektur. What, exactly, was this prep you may ask? Well, i'm a little confused as well, considering last nights show was just watching the same three videos over and over again, as per the usual, but i do have some theories which i will be touching on later.
Anyway, last nights show started unusually late after Ralph admitted on twitter that he was having webcam problems, an issue that took him about two hours to fix. After getting it fixed, he decided to wait for another streamer to end so he can grift off his numbers (which were in the high 700's, something Ralph cannot achieve anymore). Once he started the show, he revealed his new dono goal at $250 dollars, which is the lowest it's ever been at (down from 350). After a sip of
Modelo Apple Juice, A well known pay pig, Smeagolfan, single-handily donated the entire goals worth:
as if this wasn't enough to make a-logs shit their pants, Smeagol donates
another 250 dollars to top off a huge stream of pay piggy support later in the show:
But things went from bad to worse for the a-logs, as our precious re-stream by
@CringeMomma starts to get struck down by a surge of copyright strikes from several Iphone devices at once:
Ralph felts the re-stream multiple times that night, with
@CringeMomma having to restart the stream around 5 times that night:
Ralph, who is always up for a challenge, would proceed to tap the report button angrily on his Iphone for about an hour while saying absolutely nothing and just letting some whores stream play throughout the flagging spree. Piggy eventually got tired of flagging and just claimed he took the channel down and won bigly, even though it was still up and streamed what was left of the show, which, by the way,
ended with a total of $1,135 dollars made in only 4 1/2 hours worth of streaming! Smeagol coming in with the clutch W! Now Ralph doesn't have to take out a loan to pay the $800 dollars a month he owes to The Vickers Crime Family, thanks Smeagol!
Quite an unusual night to say the least... What
exactly was going on behind the scenes yesterday? Time to do a little investigating:
At 1:36PM, Ralph made his last tweet on his account stating he is going to prep for yesterdays show.
at 3:33PM, Pantsu starts tweeting her coverage over an article by Mr.Girl titled the destiny report, with Ralphs account being radio silent throughout her correspondence.
"""May""" would go on to make several tweets throughout the day,
even referring back to tweets her husband made almost a year ago as reference (something May, being the stupidest known cunt on earth, definitely has the mental capacity for both recalling and finding this unbelievably obscure and forgetful tweet to reference.):
Ralph Meigh would finish the tweeting spree just in time for Ralph to fix his webcam problems and start his late night show.
Meigh then finalized her report with 3 tweets,
all at 9:59PM exactly, meaning they were all definitely scheduled to drop mysteriously at this time:
Here are some things that I infer from all this strange behavior yesterday:
- The show prep was DSP tier pay piggery gay-ops, with Smeagol and Ralph planning on when and how much money to drop on the show.
- Ralph was too embarrassed to report on the destiny drama despite being a supposed journalist, and decided to post it under Meighs account instead for whatever reason.
There's also the possibility that i am just huffing large amounts of copium and schizo posting, and that last nights show is the beginning of Ralph making 1k a night again... Actually he's streaming right now, let's go take a look:

Where's Smeagol when you need him...
