Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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FierceBrosnan said:
I think the their focus on their partners is just enough to keep them on the hook for sex and whatnot. It's just the bare minimum of emotional investment with a nice dose of gaslighting to keep their partners around.
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Exactly. One's partners are for sexual fun, financial convenience, and validation, in no particular order.
 
Skimming for content on the subreddit I was able to find a full polyamory journey for one man, let's see how it works out for him.

Starting 3 years ago on an Online Affair subreddit (wtf?) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineAffa...f_being_ignored_even_today_being_my_birthday/ (http://archive.is/NKr6b)
Well, even with today being my birthday I was pretty much ignored. I am looking for some to fill that void. Looking for someone that is missing the same thing.
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I am father of 3 girls and 2 are teenagers and 1 preteen. Yes, heaven help me!
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Rocky marriage, three kids. Already starting off on a high point.

Two years later it looks like then went from kind of swinging to full on poly, although the wife didn't take to it initially.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/7u4t01/partner_is_having_a_hard_time_with_this_all/ (http://archive.is/9t531)
Right now, wife is still not dating anyone or even wanting too. She is in a monogamous stance if you want to call it that. She suggested that we go see her counselor to work on our marriage some more.
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... she finally agreed to it. So, now I have a LDGF[Tanner Note : LDGF is Long Distance Girlfriend] and my wife. Things are going fine, wife and I are still working on communication with each other.
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So, he has a side chick now and he is working out the issues with his wife - a happy ending?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/8f5cos/anyone_else_run_into_these_feelings/ (http://archive.is/D6XjV) - 6 months later
I am just having one of those days, where I am feeling very unwanted or unneeded. Nothing happened today, just feeling having those feelings. I am trying to hide those feelings so I don't have to explain myself.
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https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/87uax4/dating/ (http://archive.is/ltwU4) - same time
I have been using OKC, POF, Tindr, and Feeld for apps, trying to find someone local. Also, have used polymatchmaking.com and fetlife too. Anyone know of any other possible apps or sites that they have had good luck with? Heck, I have even used/r/polyamoryR4R...
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I have my age range set for 25-45 or so. I get the whole standards thing too.
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So it looks like it isn't exactly working out, but at least his wife is mono?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9hj6wm/brick_wall_after_brick_wall/ (http://archive.is/OYMiQ) - 1 month ago
I am struggling, wife is happy with her guys and I am sitting here just running into brick wall after brick wall in the dating world.
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She has two amazing guys in her life, and I am just sitting here just hitting every brick wall possible. I have even been OK with LDRs.
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I have been struggling to find someone myself. Wife is having all the luck and I am not.
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I am in Poly FB groups, I have tried dating apps, those suck. I have just tried to be myself, honest, and open.
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Yep, I went on a date with a gal that was that way. We hit it off over text and said she would be fine with it. Then after the date, she said nope and changed her mind and just stopped talk to me.
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https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9p2u3t/effort/(http://archive.is/GBIKc) - today
Does anyone else hate it when your making all the effort and you get zero effort back? That is how I am feeling right now and it sucks big time! Sorry for venting!
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TL;DR - Guy was willing to cheat on his wife, turned it into poly so he could get more needed love and affection. This did not happen as his wife and LDGF ignore him frequently especially as the wife now has two extra boyfriends that she is super happy with.

redditCLOTHESON.jpg

Don't rate me :islamic: or :horrifying: - you clicked through two spoiler tags nigga.
redditCLOTHESOFF.jpg
 
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Tanner Glass said:
Skimming for content on the subreddit I was able to find a full polyamory journey for one man, let's see how it works out for him.

Starting 3 years ago on an Online Affair subreddit (wtf?) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineAffa...f_being_ignored_even_today_being_my_birthday/ (http://archive.is/NKr6b)




Rocky marriage, three kids. Already starting off on a high point.

Two years later it looks like then went from kind of swinging to full on poly, although the wife didn't take to it initially.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/7u4t01/partner_is_having_a_hard_time_with_this_all/ (http://archive.is/9t531)



So, he has a side chick now and he is working out the issues with his wife - a happy ending?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/8f5cos/anyone_else_run_into_these_feelings/ (http://archive.is/D6XjV) - 6 months later


https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/87uax4/dating/ (http://archive.is/ltwU4) - same time



So it looks like it isn't exactly working out, but at least his wife is mono?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9hj6wm/brick_wall_after_brick_wall/ (http://archive.is/OYMiQ) - 1 month ago






https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9p2u3t/effort/(http://archive.is/GBIKc) - today


TL;DR - Guy was willing to cheat on his wife, turned it into poly so he could get more needed love and affection. This did not happen as his wife and LDGF ignore him frequently especially as the wife now has two extra boyfriends that she is super happy with.

View attachment 571128
Don't rate me :islamic: or :horrifying: - you clicked through two spoiler tags nigga.
View attachment 571130
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Absolutely beautiful. I've always considered polygamists to be the kind of people who like to have their cake and eat it, too. Looks like this guy took that literally.
 
Tanner Glass said:
Skimming for content on the subreddit I was able to find a full polyamory journey for one man, let's see how it works out for him.

Starting 3 years ago on an Online Affair subreddit (wtf?) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineAffa...f_being_ignored_even_today_being_my_birthday/ (http://archive.is/NKr6b)




Rocky marriage, three kids. Already starting off on a high point.

Two years later it looks like then went from kind of swinging to full on poly, although the wife didn't take to it initially.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/7u4t01/partner_is_having_a_hard_time_with_this_all/ (http://archive.is/9t531)



So, he has a side chick now and he is working out the issues with his wife - a happy ending?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/8f5cos/anyone_else_run_into_these_feelings/ (http://archive.is/D6XjV) - 6 months later


https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/87uax4/dating/ (http://archive.is/ltwU4) - same time



So it looks like it isn't exactly working out, but at least his wife is mono?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9hj6wm/brick_wall_after_brick_wall/ (http://archive.is/OYMiQ) - 1 month ago






https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9p2u3t/effort/(http://archive.is/GBIKc) - today


TL;DR - Guy was willing to cheat on his wife, turned it into poly so he could get more needed love and affection. This did not happen as his wife and LDGF ignore him frequently especially as the wife now has two extra boyfriends that she is super happy with.

View attachment 571128
Don't rate me :islamic: or :horrifying: - you clicked through two spoiler tags nigga.
View attachment 571130
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Where the fuck is his dick (literally)
 
Tanner Glass said:
Skimming for content on the subreddit I was able to find a full polyamory journey for one man, let's see how it works out for him.

Starting 3 years ago on an Online Affair subreddit (wtf?) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineAffa...f_being_ignored_even_today_being_my_birthday/ (http://archive.is/NKr6b)




Rocky marriage, three kids. Already starting off on a high point.

Two years later it looks like then went from kind of swinging to full on poly, although the wife didn't take to it initially.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/7u4t01/partner_is_having_a_hard_time_with_this_all/ (http://archive.is/9t531)



So, he has a side chick now and he is working out the issues with his wife - a happy ending?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/8f5cos/anyone_else_run_into_these_feelings/ (http://archive.is/D6XjV) - 6 months later


https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/87uax4/dating/ (http://archive.is/ltwU4) - same time



So it looks like it isn't exactly working out, but at least his wife is mono?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9hj6wm/brick_wall_after_brick_wall/ (http://archive.is/OYMiQ) - 1 month ago






https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9p2u3t/effort/(http://archive.is/GBIKc) - today


TL;DR - Guy was willing to cheat on his wife, turned it into poly so he could get more needed love and affection. This did not happen as his wife and LDGF ignore him frequently especially as the wife now has two extra boyfriends that she is super happy with.

View attachment 571128
Don't rate me :islamic: or :horrifying: - you clicked through two spoiler tags nigga.
View attachment 571130
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Most people who get divorced think "oh FUCK, I have to deal with dating again!" horrified of how difficult it is compared to having a spouse. these dumb fucks elect to date and get upset when it's depressing and complicated :story: yep, that's dating! It can be great but usually only after sifting through a bunch of incompatible partners. He's got nothing compelling to share on the dating scene.
 
Tanner Glass said:
Skimming for content on the subreddit I was able to find a full polyamory journey for one man, let's see how it works out for him.

Starting 3 years ago on an Online Affair subreddit (wtf?) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineAffa...f_being_ignored_even_today_being_my_birthday/ (http://archive.is/NKr6b)




Rocky marriage, three kids. Already starting off on a high point.

Two years later it looks like then went from kind of swinging to full on poly, although the wife didn't take to it initially.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/7u4t01/partner_is_having_a_hard_time_with_this_all/ (http://archive.is/9t531)



So, he has a side chick now and he is working out the issues with his wife - a happy ending?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/8f5cos/anyone_else_run_into_these_feelings/ (http://archive.is/D6XjV) - 6 months later


https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/87uax4/dating/ (http://archive.is/ltwU4) - same time



So it looks like it isn't exactly working out, but at least his wife is mono?

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9hj6wm/brick_wall_after_brick_wall/ (http://archive.is/OYMiQ) - 1 month ago






https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9p2u3t/effort/(http://archive.is/GBIKc) - today


TL;DR - Guy was willing to cheat on his wife, turned it into poly so he could get more needed love and affection. This did not happen as his wife and LDGF ignore him frequently especially as the wife now has two extra boyfriends that she is super happy with.

View attachment 571128
Don't rate me :islamic: or :horrifying: - you clicked through two spoiler tags nigga.
View attachment 571130
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Don't wait for me to cry a river for the dude that was willing to hurt his wife and ruin his family just to end up cucking himself.
 
Polyamory is degeneracy at its finest. It shows how uncommited a person is and how their sex drives are so through the roof that they cant settle with one partner. Its just nasty and its so full of drama
 
Kylie Raina said:
It shows how uncommited a person is and how their sex drives are so through the roof that they cant settle with one partner
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I don't think it's even a matter of them being rabid sex apes. Usually when a relationship "goes poly" it's really just one partner cheating on the other and abandoning them while still living under the same roof.
If anything, what they're addicted to is that so-called "new relationship energy" (i.e. infatuation) rather than sex itself.
 
Kylie Raina said:
Polyamory is degeneracy at its finest. It shows how uncommited a person is and how their sex drives are so through the roof that they cant settle with one partner. Its just nasty and its so full of drama
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I don't think it's strictly about sex (although obviously it's a component) - despite frequently posting in this thread I don't have an issue with polyamory itself; if it works and everyone is happy then god bless. The key point is if it works for everyone. Because of jealousy and other issues it rarely works - and then on top of that a lot of these folks try and use it to save a failing relationship or to address cheating, instead of ending the relationship and moving on.

Trawling through, here's another sad polyamory tale.

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9qv1l7/my_partner_and_i_are_having_issues_because_he/ (http://archive.is/kCzd1)
https://snew.github.io/r/relationsh...artner_43m_and_i_25f_have_a_very_complicated/ (this is different from the above link in one specific way)

This is a tale of our protagonist Elle and her journey into not realizing that her on and off again boyfriend will tell her what she wants to hear and she's clearly the side chick. I'm not sure why she posted this in r/polyamory aside from the fact her boyfriend has a girlfriend, but it's tragic enough to post here.

I (we'll call me Elle) am a 25 year old woman who has been in a relationship with my 43 year old male partner (let's call him Brad) in some regard for 4 years.

We are heavily involved in the BDSM community. I started playing with him in 2014. He collared me (we entered a power exchange relationship) in 2016. We broke up in Nov 2017. We got back together this May 2018.
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Brad has another collared 30 year old female partner (we'll call her Lizzie). They're both from the northwest, Brad and I live together in the midwest. They've been together for 15+ years.
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Special Note - On the most recent post the user changed "30 year old" to "35 year old" but is sure sounds like Brad was 28 and "Lizzie" was 15. I have included the ceddit link that uses the "30 year old" as I don't believe that to be a mistake as Elle was 21 and Brad was 39 when their relationship started.

Lizzie very much lets Brad make all the decisions and seems to be happy letting him lie to her.
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They don't spend much time together anymore and barely have sex. He told me 4 times in the last year.
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Over the course of 4 years however we gave reached a point where we both want to be monogamous (kind of on his part).
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Brad and I had an emotional breakup in 2017. He went through a mental health crisis afterwards and got a lot of therapy which led to us getting back together this last May.
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... we discussed getting married and having kids. This is our 2 year plan basically.
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He hasn't even told her that we're back together. We live together, we wear rings. He's met my whole family and I've met his. We're supposed to be getting married next October.
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He refuses to commit to talking to her about this and I can't help but feel that he's putting his own selfish wants above both mine and her needs.
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I seem like the other woman and it's heartbreaking to spend time with his family and get close to them but I can't even friend his sister on facebook in case Lizzie sees it.
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He's promised me that me and our future family comes first now but his actions aren't really lining up. He gives me mixed messages. They don't spend much time together, they don't have sex, etc, but he loves her and can't leave her even though I'm the only woman he's ever wanted to marry and have kids with - according to him
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I've put a lot of energy into this relationship. I've sacrificed relationships, lost jobs, lost apartments, put my masters degree on the line, and I constantly try to do the emotional work. If we broke up again I would be in my mom's house again, no job, and my masters program that I just restarted an hour and a half away.
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He has been manipulative in the past but is one of the few who actually went to therapy and is trying to be a better person. I have met his therapist. I am going to be a therapist. I don't think he's using me for sex.
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The first break up was BDSM related about our power dynamic being unhealthy because of his control issues. I wanted to renegotiate the dynamic and he didn't so we broke up.
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This one is just a bit funnier as the last few have been depressing.

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9r6ufh/between_a_rock_and_a_hard_place_or_sex_with_two/ (http://archive.is/bUOhb)

My wife of ten years came out as Asexual this year and informed me that she doesn't enjoy sex and only does it to make me happy. At this point we opened the marriage up to allow me to find another partner I'm sexually compatible with.
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So i tell N about our decision to open and she immediately starts to hit on me.
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we have amazing sex, I go to visit her, again awesome sex. We start to develop a relationship, emotionally
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She continues that she doesn't really enjoy sex, she just does it to make her partner happy.
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So now i have two wonderful ladies in my life that neither one WANTS to have sex with me
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I'd like to think I'm a very generous lover, I just seem to be attracted to a certain type of woman it seems lol.
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TL;DR - Guy's wife no longer wants to have sex on the basis she doesn't enjoy it. Opens marriage, guy has sex with new girlfriend twice only to find that the new girlfriend does not enjoy sex either.

Another small one in two parts.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9rabit/i_took_a_wrong_turn/ (http://archive.is/ZFPJ7)
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9lvp95/breaking_up/ (http://archive.is/3xKIx)

Today
My girlfriend and I parted ways last night because her boyfriend gave her an ultimatum. I either like him and her or I can't have her all.
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I'm actually really heart broken but have to act like everything is ok. I really loved the girl and we spent every day together it hurts.
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How do I get over this level of pain?
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19 Days Ago
I'm madly in love with the girl and have no feelings for the guy. Our feelings for each other makes it hard for us to break up and stay that way.
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We've broken up twice already in 6 months. Third time will be the last
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I (35f) her (35f) him (40m)
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TL;DR - "I broke up with a poly on-and-off girlfriend I've been kind of seeing for six months. "HOW DO I GET OVER THIS LEVEL OF PAIN?"" - a 35 year old adult woman.

 
Tanner Glass said:
I don't think it's strictly about sex (although obviously it's a component) - despite frequently posting in this thread I don't have an issue with polyamory itself; if it works and everyone is happy then god bless. The key point is if it works for everyone. Because of jealousy and other issues it rarely works - and then on top of that a lot of these folks try and use it to save a failing relationship or to address cheating, instead of ending the relationship and moving on.

Trawling through, here's another sad polyamory tale.

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9qv1l7/my_partner_and_i_are_having_issues_because_he/ (http://archive.is/kCzd1)
https://snew.github.io/r/relationsh...artner_43m_and_i_25f_have_a_very_complicated/ (this is different from the above link in one specific way)

This is a tale of our protagonist Elle and her journey into not realizing that her on and off again boyfriend will tell her what she wants to hear and she's clearly the side chick. I'm not sure why she posted this in r/polyamory aside from the fact her boyfriend has a girlfriend, but it's tragic enough to post here.




Special Note - On the most recent post the user changed "30 year old" to "35 year old" but is sure sounds like Brad was 28 and "Lizzie" was 15. I have included the ceddit link that uses the "30 year old" as I don't believe that to be a mistake as Elle was 21 and Brad was 39 when their relationship started.
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These BDSM fucks too. Stop trying to tell me this shit is "normal" and "healthy." Like, I'm one of the rare non-autistic asexuals, and I cannot goddamn stand these people.

Have you considered - and I know this is fucking extreme - but just fucking loving somebody? Like not pretending you "need" to constantly be fucking something, or introducing all this depraved fucking bullshit just to help you press your pleasure button like a fucking monkey?

In any other context this would be extreme drug addiction, but because the chemical is endogenous, it's okay.

Fuck these degens.
 
I wish this was more of a polyamory general thread, because there’s a whole lot of retardatīon that exists outside of the subreddit.
 
scathefire said:
I wish this was more of a polyamory general thread, because there’s a whole lot of retardatīon that exists outside of the subreddit.
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I don't think anyone would mind if you posted hilarity from other places here as long as it pretained to polyamory. Reddit is just the easiest place to find it.
 
Tanner Glass said:
This one is just a bit funnier as the last few have been depressing.

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9r6ufh/between_a_rock_and_a_hard_place_or_sex_with_two/ (http://archive.is/bUOhb)








TL;DR - Guy's wife no longer wants to have sex on the basis she doesn't enjoy it. Opens marriage, guy has sex with new girlfriend twice only to find that the new girlfriend does not enjoy sex either.

Another small one in two parts.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9rabit/i_took_a_wrong_turn/ (http://archive.is/ZFPJ7)
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9lvp95/breaking_up/ (http://archive.is/3xKIx)

Today




19 Days Ago




TL;DR - "I broke up with a poly on-and-off girlfriend I've been kind of seeing for six months. "HOW DO I GET OVER THIS LEVEL OF PAIN?"" - a 35 year old adult woman.
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If one chick doesn't enjoy having sex with you, it's her. If two chicks don't enjoy having sex with you, it's you.

Blarmed&Dangerous said:
These BDSM fucks too. Stop trying to tell me this shit is "normal" and "healthy." Like, I'm one of the rare non-autistic asexuals, and I cannot goddamn stand these people.

Have you considered - and I know this is fucking extreme - but just fucking loving somebody? Like not pretending you "need" to constantly be fucking something, or introducing all this depraved fucking bullshit just to help you press your pleasure button like a fucking monkey?

In any other context this would be extreme drug addiction, but because the chemical is endogenous, it's okay.

Fuck these degens.
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BDSM people trying to make everyone else accept them makes me mad. Most people don't wanna get hit during sex, okay?

scathefire said:
I wish this was more of a polyamory general thread, because there’s a whole lot of retardatīon that exists outside of the subreddit.
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There actually was a polyamory general thread and it got shut down because it was just people complaining about poly people being weirdos.
 
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