Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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Tanner Glass said:
I love these, it's like a Tarantino movie or a weird written math problem.


Did the OP ruin a 6 year relationship by transitioning and then shamble into this poly nonsense? Was he used to actual love and intimacy in a stable relationship and thought that this would be even better? Perhaps we'll never know, but that's my version of events.
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I've seen a lot of people do this. They start small, by being friends with people who are trans, and they persuade them that they're trans too and that their live will be meaningless until they transition. So they fuck up their whole lives in pursuit of this fucking lie, because we all know that trannies are massively unhappy what with nearly half offing themselves.

In short, I can totally believe that what you've said is pretty spot on, just going off my own totally anecdotal experiences
 
Tanner Glass said:
I love these, it's like a Tarantino movie or a weird written math problem.

> OP is Trans, F to M.
> R is a girl (allegedly) and is having "very serious and real tramua with sex", however is still banging T but not the OP.
> T is a man (allegedly) but apparently is bi? It's unclear if T + OP started dating when he was a she or if he was a he the whole time. Double for R as well.
> T is also banging S, who's gender is not specified, although it should be. It could be T isn't onto Man on Man anymore.

Some more clues about OP from the comments section.
OP - Yeah for me I sincerely don’t enjoy “romance”. Like I have been in long looooong happy relationships but can’t say I’ve “been in love”.
OP - I think for me I carry a lot of baggage because my last big relationship of 6 years ended after my now ex admitted he hadn’t found me attractive for the previous year. It felt more like a betrayal and like... idk the emotional equivalent of realizing you had toilet paper on your shoe. It feels weirdly both public and humiliating, despite being in a private relationship.

Did the OP ruin a 6 year relationship by transitioning and then shamble into this poly nonsense? Was he used to actual love and intimacy in a stable relationship and thought that this would be even better? Perhaps we'll never know, but that's my version of events.
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everyone involved here is a huge fag

The funniest thing to do with an r/polyamory poster is to go through their account history.
OP posted in r/DecidingToBeBetter asking for books to help with self esteem and insecurity. They posted in r/NeckbeardNests asking why they fall back into their nesting ways. They posted in r/AskDocs and r/Testosterone asking about their health issues caused by T. It just goes on. They have ADHD, and anxiety, and OCD, and Bipolar, and Borderline Personality Disorder, and they posted in r/asktransgender if they're confusing their BPD for dysphoria, since they mirror other people. And they work for their dad who won't tell them how much money they make, and they've posted on r/RaisedByNarcissists about him. They've been suicidal since age 8. They impulse buy and have credit card debt. They have a weed problem even though their older posts have them saying they're never going back to weed. In short, they're a fucking mess.

Here's a before and after photo:
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(age 25 to age 27)

A sad post from three years ago:
My body is a strange thing for me to accept or even love. I'm tall (nearly 6'1"), broad as fuck, built very straight but since I've been gaining weight (I'm 220 now)... it doesn't feel like my body is as "good" as before. I used to get comments like, "Oh, you're so statuesque!" but now I'm hiding under layers of clothing.

I'm not "curvy" enough to have this acceptable plus-size kind of look and I feel like the way I want to dress (cute, pink and sparkly) is so unattainable because I'm just this blocky bulky thing.
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And the ex-boyfriend was from a Muslim family.
 
Jesus Christ what a decline in her looks. She needs a therapist not a sex change. What the trans community does, with throwing gender "changes" at people rather than suggesting they seek help, is abuse in it's purest form. "Noooo, don't work on your issues or talk them through! Get a neopenis/vagina and ALLL your problems will be solved!! ALL OF THEM!!!"

What a bunch of utter bastards they are. bad enough they ruin their own lives, they have to drag others down too, just like fat acceptance fans
 
I'm so crazy for wanting my husband and not to share intimate physical and emotional closeness with other women. Haha hormones amirite?
 
vertexwindi said:
I'm so crazy for wanting my husband and not to share intimate physical and emotional closeness with other women. Haha hormones amirite?
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I'll just re-read those recommended books again, I'm sure I'll sort it out.

Edit - Oh this poor woman, lmao. She's actually been going through the recommended books for several months. Bless her heart. She articulates so well why it's a bad idea and just can't stop herself.

Fucking imagine your husband wants to fuck other women after being married for 10 years and he has you fill out exercises in a workbook like you're in grade school.

It’s been about 1.5 months since my spouse of ten years dropped the poly bomb on me.
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I have been reading this subreddit and More Than Two
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I have been making my way through The Jealousy Workbook and Nonviolent Communication
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After going through some of the exercises in The Jealousy Workbook I have discovered that my jealousy mainly lies in insecurity
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I am grateful that he has never cheated on me, and think it speaks volumes to the respect he has for me that we have been in a monogamous relationship this long without the betrayal of cheating.
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((When asked "Why are you in couple's counciling?)) We originally went for our own sex life.
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I wish there could be a cultural exchange between r/polyamory and r/relationships, so r/relationships could tell her to dump the motherfucker already.

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Her first reddit post.
 
>My husband insists that "am I good enough" is the wrong question to ask, because in truth nobody is.

Wow. So close to a conventionally wise but reasonable answer, and then he goes all Dennis Reynolds in the last clause.
 
I am grateful that he has never cheated on me, and think it speaks volumes to the respect he has for me that we have been in a monogamous relationship this long without the betrayal of cheating.
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I am grateful that the restaurant I have lunch daily at has never poisoned me, and I think it speaks volumes to the respect the cooks have for me that I've been their customer this long without the betrayal of poisoning.
 
SubtleInvitation said:
I am grateful that the restaurant I have lunch daily at has never poisoned me, and I think it speaks volumes to the respect the cooks have for me that I've been their customer this long without the betrayal of poisoning.
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Yeah but don't you get tired of having the same food over and over again? Isn't natural and right to go to a different restaurant whenever you feel like it, and establish a similar bond with the cooks there? Checkmate, monotheists.
 
Brain Problems said:
Yeah but don't you get tired of having the same food over and over again? Isn't natural and right to go to a different restaurant whenever you feel like it, and establish a similar bond with the cooks there? Checkmate, monotheists.
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To quote Exodus 20:5 but with all instances of God replaced with cook/chef
You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the CHEF your Cook, am a jealous Cook, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who don't eat at my restaurant,
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Brain Problems said:
Yeah but don't you get tired of having the same food over and over again? Isn't natural and right to go to a different restaurant whenever you feel like it, and establish a similar bond with the cooks there? Checkmate, monotheists.
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Going to different restaurants is fine, but it's different when you've been running one for ten years and are now trying to spring a shaky franchise agreement onto your business partner with no warning.

EDIT - "Please educate yourself by reading More Than One Location and The Franchisee Workbook".
 
Tanner Glass said:
Going to different restaurants is fine, but it's different when you've been running one for ten years and are now trying to spring a shaky franchise agreement onto your business partner with no warning.

EDIT - "Please educate yourself by reading More Than One Location and The Franchisee Workbook".
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I prefer The Ethical Glutton, thanks.
 
Putting the 'munch' in 'poly munch', hunh?

Reminds me of that Chris Rock skit.
Niggas always want credit for some shit they supposed to do. A nigga will brag about some shit a normal man just does. A nigga will say some shit like, "I take care of my kids." You're supposed to, you dumb motherfucker! What kind of ignorant shit is that? "I ain't never been to jail!" What do you want, a cookie?! You're not supposed to go to jail, you low-expectation-having motherfucker!
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Your husband not cheating on you is about the lowest bar there is.
Also if someone said 'yeah, my husband's great, he doesn't hit me.' I'd be kinda wondering if, well, maybe he doesn't hit her, but he's doing something almost as bad.
 
Another satisfied customer.
https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/aezagi/i_feel_violated/ (Archive)

After a long long slog of bad sex this week has been good between my husband and I. Then today I find it that immediately preceding each encounter he was graphically sexting with a new interest. I knew about her and was ok in general, but I now feel so dirty inside. I never would have consented to sex after a sext date with another woman. I feel like I was used to dump another woman’s load of cum in.
He swears he was only thinking of me but come on, telling one woman you’re going to go ice your groin and then 15 minutes later getting off in your wife? He would be absolutely livid if the tables were turned the other direction.
He didn’t violate any agreements and I have a new boundary very very clearly communicated that will prevent this from happening again, but in the mean time I feel horrible.
I guess it’s just one more thing to suck up and move on about.
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Who would have thought that tampering with a relationship would make it less intimate and personal.

OP from the comments
I feel like a flesh light. I do expect better than that
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Trust is definitely an issue. It’s the only reason I need the boundary. Not an issue with my other partner.
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Also, saw a familiar face in the crowd.
Crunchy Leaf said:
I wish there could be a cultural exchange between r/polyamory and r/relationships, so r/relationships could tell her to dump the motherfucker already.

View attachment 632774
Her first reddit post.
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She has a new post.
Came here to say that I am acknowledging the death of an emotional fantasy. A fantasy in which I am the love of my husband’s life and the only one he desires. There have been so many emotions that I have worked through already and I’ve finally made my way to really processing ‘loss of status as one and only’. Logically I understand that it has always been a fantasy but emotionally I want to bid it farewell. I was raised largely by grandparents who adored each other and truly were each other’s one and only and I always thought my relationship would look like theirs. While this fantasy is dead, I’m looking forward to exploring what else life has in store for us.
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This sounds like someone being forcibly walked to a guillotine thinking "at least it's finally over" and not actually someone excited to start a new chapter in their life.
 
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